Live from the Pathway Studios in Johnston proper. You are live from the path. And you're listening to live from the back coming from the Pathway Studios here in Johnston proper. Why do I feel like there's good talking and Ballyhoo going on? There's a Good Time book coming up.

Did you just say Ballyhoo? Yeah. There's ballet who happening. What is ballet? It's always going on behind me too. There's always a mic and some kind of jacking it chorus back there making some sort of roast when I'm trying to fire up a legitimate pseudo program. You tell me when you start this legitimate program, and I'll take my ways. There are at least a half dozen people that listen to the podcast, Mike. Yeah. Sorry, Ma. Alright. Anyway, you six people are listening live from the Path. Thanks for coming and hanging out with us tonight. Very much appreciate you. And here's what I think we're talking about.

Mike's got some deer live from the path. Did you happen to take a look at any of those? Yeah. I I looked at a couple of them. One of them has to do with the husband found out that his wife was cheating on him and he can't figure out how to deal with it. I'm pretty sure we'll slice and dice that one pretty fast. K. And then something else about a helicopter parent and then some kind of grandma suspicious of a generous gift from a boy to a gal. So Hey, that's fair. I just read the headlines. We might even read those. I'm not sure. Hey, man. So my wife was, like, as a special treat to the kids, the girls tonight was, like, curling their hair, and I about made her knock it off. Because, like, my, my middle kid, she was curling her hair, and she looked ten years older. Yeah. And I thought, that kid looks like I'm gonna have to send her off to some kinda some kinda dude.

And I thought, forget it. Uncurl the hair. Put her in the basement. Is that wrong? Uncurl the hair. Put her in the basement. The second part There's only a couple things wrong with that. One is I'm certain you don't have a basement. You just have a crawl space. Yeah. That's horrifying. Yeah. That's illegal. Yeah. And two, I thought maybe more I'd meet the fellow before I just sent her away. Here's the thing. I I've never I never thought I would say a sentence like this, but I know where Paul and David Koresh were both coming from given this this circumstance. But yeah. Absolutely.

Alright. You're gonna have to unpack that part. So Paul so so he's when he's talking about ladies and their hair, I think to myself, yeah. I don't really care. And then I see the girl growing up and having to go down the aisle with the dude, and I think, you know what? No. Don't do that with the hair and stuff and bring the guys in. And then David Koresh took a bunch of people and convinced them to live away from society in a building until the government came and got them. And I thought, yeah, I would do that. I would do that to hide. If let's say look, his name's gonna be like Brian. That's his freaking name. He's gonna come to the door and be like, hey,

is Layla here? And I'm gonna say, shut up, Brian. We're going to live in Texas. Yeah. So I was actually reading those Dear Life from the Past, and I found one about a some somewhat compulsive father that I think we'll go through. Or Alright. Or Dale. Dale Dale's

Dale's are coming back, and he wants to date my daughter, and I hate it. You think the two dudes that are gonna try and date your daughter are either Brian or Dale? I hate both them. You hate both of them. Yeah. Here's the deal. The truth is, you don't hate people you're praying for. I've been praying kinda praying against them. And I should dear Lord, please dispatch with Brian and Dale. I I God the Lord, I'm sure, doesn't listen to in this matter, and he's much more gracious than I. But I it's just something that I hope that my heart has to change about. In the meantime, there's about 50 acres in Texas that I feel like got my name on it.

Hey. It was recently there. It's gorgeous. Thank you. I'll take that as a personal compliment. You need to go. Alright. You've been listening live Friday. Here's here's what we got going on. Oh, hey. Hey, man. Daniel Johnson's in the studio. Hey. Hey. It's good as so here's the deal. Is he got thrown out of here last time he was in here for taking his shirt off repeatedly during the broadcast. Yeah. It was uncomfortable for everybody. Did you do that? No. You don't remember. Shut up, Brian. That

was in your energy drink phase. You don't remember a lot. That was a long time ago. It's been a few years, man. No. That's true. It's been a while. So, hey, so what have you been up to? It's so weird that I can't see you. Yeah. I see a monitor. Not really up to a lot. I just just started, oh, hi. Hi, microphone. How are you?

I'm actually starting a brand now. I've left music. I've been out of music since 2013, And, I decided to had to sit down, take a long look in the mirror, figure out what I wanted to do with my life and came to the conclusion that even though I'm not going to make it in the music industry, that I'm gonna start a brand with the sole purpose of helping others make it in the music industry. So, yeah, that that's kind of what I've been up to. It's been been a long process in the making, but we're we're getting there finally. So is that beard part of that deal? Yeah. Yeah. The beard the beard, I started I started to grow the beard when the idea came, and I'm just gonna keep it growing until the idea comes to fruition. Then I'll shave it. So is there is there a certain amount of of of of passion you have for both spectrums? Like, one, you know, being being part of the music when you were a musician, but, also just just part of the business of of of branding and selling musicians as well? Oh, yeah. I mean, I think my experience as a musician has really fueled this because I know when I was a musician, there were things that I wish that I had or I wish that somebody would have given me. Like a beard. Like a beard. Like exactly. And I wanna be the guy that supports musicians in the way that I wish I was supported.

So the idea is, like, we have a brand. I mean, we're called ninety one nineteen, and the hashtag is dreamers welcome because the whole concept is if you have a dream, we want you here. So we partner with them. We help them. We fund them. We help them grow in in hopes that one day they leave and get signed by a bigger label like, bigger record label or go on to do something else. And we kinda wanna be the middle guy, the guy that they come to, we work with them until they're ready, and then we send them off to do bigger and better things. That sounds pretty cool. So, actually, is there is there, like, where are we at in the stage of this thing? The

company technically started the end of November, so we finally got all the the filing done. I have I'm in Iowa for the next three days because I have meetings with videographers, photographers, graphic designers to try to put the pieces together. We're hoping to go live with the first line in April. So we're And by line, you mean what? The brand itself because it's gonna be a good shirt brand. It's a streetwear brand similar to, I don't know if you know, like, Co, Obey.

It's very skateboard streetwear, like, very I'm actually known for having legit streetwear. So absolutely. So, yeah, we're we're we're that kind of style, and, yeah, hopefully gonna go live with the first official line in in April.

And so is there are you are you sourcing the products, like, solely through you, or they'll be sourced through, many places? To start us, we'll be online. We're gonna operate it all out of my friend's basement because we're doing all of our screen printing ourselves. Absolutely. So all all in house. And then hopefully in time, we can start branching out and selling at other places. But for now, it's just us. Hey, man. You might leave that off the pitch. I've had that same reaction when I say, hey. We run a podcast. Yeah. No. We're we're we've started my friend's basement.

Actually, I was just thinking I would wear his clothes that are marked as my friend's basement. Yeah. I feel like I would wear those everywhere. So if you wanna do a special limited run of say one, I will certainly purchase it. Perfect. I will I'll make that happen for you. Good. We're we're we're not done with this conversation. We're gonna come back and talk to Jay a little bit more about what he's got going. So that's that's pretty cool, man. Thanks for coming in. Yeah. No problem. Alright. So so here's the deal. There was an article that came out. Oh, come on. Man, I swear. We got troubles over here. Alright. So so John, John Piper,

respected pastor, at a well, is he x? What's the right way to say that, Dave Herrick? What? He's like, he's not the he's not the pastor there anymore at the was it Bethlehem in wherever he was at? Oh, Bethel. But he's not he's not an ex pastor. He's retired. Yeah. I guess he's retired, but he I mean, he still publishes all kinds of stuff. So Yeah. He's like the Larry David. Anyway, so so He's never he's not going away. No. Okay. So he offers seven reasons not to play the lottery, and this seems to be quite the, this is the popular deal to talk about given the the Powerball's reached in the billions. So it it says, theologian John Piper explains what it means.

Let's see. Here we go. With January's Powerball jackpot estimated at we're up to almost $1,500,000,000. Christians might be tempted to play, but pastor John Piper explains why he advises people to avoid the gambling track. Now here's what I don't want. I I wanna kinda react to the the reasons as opposed to just

our immediate reaction, which tend to be, I don't like Pharisees. Right? So, like, I get that, but, like, let's let's follow the discussion about what he's pointing to as to whether this seems like something we should be reacting to or not. Alright. Number one, It is spiritually suicidal. Playing the lottery could jeopardize your spiritual well-being, explains Piper, who gets right to the point with a quote from first Timothy. Those who desire to be rich fall into temptation into a snare into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. First Timothy.

Mike, is that a is that a risk? Well, I I I mean, I think it's a legit risk. I I don't know. I mean, it it's it's just like everything else. Right? Like, the the Bible operates in in the gray and with your heart and your aspirations. Right? Like the Bible shows proof of righteous rich and righteous poor and unrighteous rich and unrighteous poor. And so people who are following Christ that that have you know, if you can be trusted with little, you can be trusted with much.

I don't know if it necessarily the the lottery is is is the much. But I mean, just from the mere fact of of seeking to gain money, your motivation of what you choose to do with it is probably more of the conversation, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. So this is, if you desire to be rich, you, fall into a snare into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. So here's here's the thing I was thinking is that in all reality, I I think 1,500,000,000 would kill me.

Would point my life in a crappy direction and potentially physically kill me. Given the amount of foolishness that can be done with $1,500,000,000. I agree. And so here's

my here's the reason I think that is I I go every once in a while when I'm driving home from work, my wife will say, hey, will you stop stop at the store and get, you know, milk or eggs or something before you come home? And I'm by myself and I'm in the I'm in the Walmart or something, and I think to myself, I can buy anything in here to eat. Any snack possible. The kids aren't around, so I could eat it gluttonously in my car, and they won't know the difference. And then and then I think Just a quick aside. Your life is small and petty. Hey, I got some chocolate or a fudge peanut butter no bakes in the wheels at the moment. If you wanna shut your shut your trap and enjoy them later.

This is a product of this circumstance. That's what I'm saying. I bought them today. I'm done, man. I'm sorry. Just give me the chocolate no bakes and be my friend. So so it just I don't know. Like, it's that level of freedom that says I can do whatever you want. It makes me do foolish things. And I'd like to I'd like to make it sound as if I have the ability to control myself and won't do stupid things with money, but it is simply not the case. Like, in reality, there is a there is a amount of money probably on an annual basis that I can handle, and anything above that is extremely dangerous for me spiritually,

for my relationships, for my relationships with my wife, for what I actually value in life. And and I think I'm willing to buy this more than think some people are willing to push that off. But, like, in reality, I'd like to think that that I would not be susceptible to things, but, like, every doofus has thought that. I can get close to this woman and talk to her for a little bit and not end up cheating on my wife or otherwise making a jack and apes out myself. Yeah. Right. Everybody thought that. And so there's there's a little bit of humility that says, you know what? I I I cannot I should not win this money. I will do foolish things with it. It will cause me to do wrongness in my life. No. Actually,

like like it to to a broader point, like, you know, most people don't feel the weight of their paycheck. Like, you would feel the weight of, you know, $1,500,000,000.

Or we'll call it even the payout money, like the high the high mills. Yeah. But like, the things that come with that kind of maybe maybe it will not bring the worst out in you within the first day that you have it. It will bring out the worst in everybody you know. Like like, there's a reason that that that you can't worship God in money. Right? Because have you seen people's reaction to money? Just people in general. Like that mass amounts of money. They will they come out of the woodwork with with everything that you could ever imagine, and your your life is done. It is absolutely done and over with. And and frankly, I whatever you held dear prior to then will not be an option after it's done. Like, I just don't see how you could have it and not be completely corrupted from what you've created. Out of all the people that I know that that, you know, claim to be Christians, claim to not be Christians, whatever. Just whatever walk of life. Out of all the people I know, I probably know less than

two people that would not destroy themselves with that much money. I I mean, I can't imagine anybody that wouldn't would do the whole, you know, give to charities, give to churches, give to the right kind of people, live a an an honest life within good means and take care of their kids and not just completely screw

everything that they have going good for themselves up with that amount of money. So I I'm I'm hard pressed to agree with number one. I don't know. Any disagreements? Alright. Number two, it is a kind of embezzlement. Just as faithful trustees may not gamble with the trust fund, you are a caretaker of your money which belongs to God. Managers don't gamble with their master's money. All you have belongs to God. All of it.

The parable of the talent says Jesus will take account of how we handled his money. They went and worked. That is how we seek to provide for ourselves in the scriptures. Nah. I don't really get what he's saying there. Yeah. That's not scripture isn't against gambling. Well, he's saying that it's financially foolish to to take God's money and do something like this with it. So

wouldn't wouldn't you see like a don't don't churches do a lot of bingo? A lot a lot of bingo hall action? That's fair. Yeah. Do churches do a lot of bingo? Yeah. I mean, aren't there much aren't there bunch of little old folk in churches doing bingo? You know, I Or is is that a facade that the Internet has taught me? That parable, though, the the the one that wasn't, that didn't make his master happy was the one that went just buried it. Right? Am I thinking the right story? Moova says putting the money to work is putting it into the lottery. No. I'm not I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is I'm trying to make sure that I'm thinking the right story. That was No. Yeah. That's it. There's a that's a story about three guys. They they were each given a portion

to invest as a guy was taking off and leaving. But kind of the background of the story is that that happened historically, and they were expecting that the guy was gonna come back and, you know, disappear or something. Somehow misfortune was gonna happen to him. So the guy who went and buried it essentially was hoping that the guy disappears, in which case he can go unbury it and it's his now. Oh. Whereas everyone else, they would still have a paper trail associating that money with with the master. Oh.

I didn't know that. I also did not know that. Fair enough. Thanks, Eric. Hey, man. That now has nothing to do with this story. Hey. Go ahead, Mike. So I actually got in this argument with my grandma Because she said the same thing about gambling. And I said, well, where does your retirement money come from? And they were invested in mutual funds and and and whatever. And I mean, it wasn't a a large sum of money or anything, but like, the stock market is just as much of a gamble as blackjack. Yeah. And so, like, I I I don't know how you could how you could, you know, glorify one and shame the other and act like the like Buva's example of the talent man who sits on it and doesn't does bubbles. Yeah. In the parable of the talents, like, it's the guys who took some level of risk with the money. That's how the returns happened. Yeah. Right. Look at the dishonest manager parable. I mean, that guy straight up shaded everybody,

and he came out winning. I I know one of the big differences between the the mutual funds and and stock market and things like that versus gambling is the people that you are handing your money to are on your side in a mutual fund. They're trying to see the money in the business grow True. To to bring back more money. They they're your allies in this. Whereas when it comes to actual gambling, the house is your enemy in this. They win when you lose. So you end up doing some kind of a it's a whole different type of contest.

There's still risk associated with both, but when it comes to gambling, the entire design of the system is for you to fail. That's how the house wins. That's why they're in business is you fail at it. You should've argued on my grandma's behalf because I won and I shouldn't have. Sorry. Mike, you're a better man for admitting that. Touche, Eric. Yeah. There's there's there's an inner I don't know. It just depends what you're what you're struggling with here. Like, you wanna dump, you wanna deduct $10 in the in the quarter slots as

a form of entertainment. If you if you wanna as opposed to sending in your your $5 to help the the state fund, you wanna potentially win a billion and 0.5, for for giving $5 to the state. I don't know that I care. As but at least as as long as you understand what it is that you're actually getting into.

With the risk that if you're investing in this in such a way because, money is going to ruin your life, see option one, you should not do that. Yeah. Yeah. Otherwise, I don't know.

Oh, like, it's it's it's difficult to equate this to the parable of the talents because I think you could ask the same question about the guy that bought the Almond Joy last, you know, last Tuesday. AKA you? No. I sometimes I don't feel like a nut, boo. Yeah. But I mean yeah. But when is it I mean, when are you not taking a gamble? Right? Like, I take a gamble every time I drive in my car. I take a gamble every time I sit in a seat. I haven't sat in before.

You know what I'm saying? Like Wait. What what what is that? Like a whoopee cushion or a tack or what's that? Maybe it's maybe it has a loose a loose leg or something that's gonna fall to my peril. Like, that's a gamble. Don't No risk in it. I don't go around life afraid of where to put my butt. I'm just that's exactly what It's a hard life to live. So why would you be afraid to drop five bones on the lottery? You know, when you take you take the same measure of risk on all kinds of things throughout the day. The the issue isn't so much the risk. It's what you're trying to accomplish with the risk. I'm trying to accomplish a comfortable butt. There's nothing wrong with risk. God provides that. The the problem is that it's the love of money. That that was his first point there was that it's that desire for for more money is what the issue is. And gambling, there is literally no reason to gamble except to either be entertained by a couple of quarters falling down. Yes. Or to desire to line your pockets with more money.

And if you're looking for some kind of entertainment, well, I mean, you know, there's a lot of different ways that you can spend your money on entertainment. Don't judge me, Herrick. Angry Birds is totally worth it. I'm okay with that. I I He's pretty good at it too. I have no problem with that. It it's don't throw shade on the birds. It it's gambling that kinda runs the risk of moving your entertainment more into other nefarious things that could even be addict ive for me. So the question is is it does it run the risk, or is it inherently

no good? I don't see a purpose in gambling other than, you know, that desire for more money, and that's what's evil. So I take it you don't gamble for entertainment? I do not gamble. Well, hold on. I work for a desire of more money. That's why I go to every my everyday job.

That's why I started a business. Yeah. That's why Daniel started a business. I was saying that's a gamble too. Like Daniel loves money. It's my favorite thing. So I I see I get that, though, because, like, everything's a risk. Like, I'm putting

a ton of money into a business just so I can get a return on that because that's that's the point, isn't it? I mean, there's a general purpose to what I'm doing, but at the end of the day, like, I wanna see that grow, and I wanna see it expand and, yeah, and make money. But Yeah. But there's a difference between working to get your bills paid and and be responsible to your family versus what you're doing with the lottery. So you're just not comfortable with the level of with the level of risk associated with trying to

derive money from gambling? It's just not not acceptable risk to you. Because because otherwise, like, I I if if I get money let's say I get money playing video poker versus I get money, I don't know, wiping down seats at the local auditorium

to at both feed my family, what's it to you? Oh, you're talking about gambling as a form of You're trying you're trying to bring in money. That's the deal. I got $20. I want 40. Blackjack gives me the option. Well, then then the Powerball isn't so much the discussion point. You're you're just talking about someone who lives in in a casino.

Oh, I mean, could or he just wants $40 every few days. And he pops in for the free soda It's a fair enough. And an extra 20 spot on the on the blackjack. Yeah. But it is also not I mean, the the seat wiping is a guaranteed rate of return. Yeah. Like, it's I and and and to be fair, like, I'm I'm I'm slightly verse picking here. Like the overarching theme of, especially if you like to bring in the proverbs about righteous work and and and, you know, a man that works a man who doesn't work doesn't eat. And and, you know, I mean, the Lord is fairly clear that that, you know, the the world's gonna be toil. Your work is gonna be rough. And, I don't know if you can categorize, like, if it ain't toil, it ain't work. But I mean, like, you know, as, if you take scripture as a whole, you know, God's work ethic is is reflection in our work ethic. And I, you know, I I think it's if you're if you're comfortably making money with, no effort and no drive, but only to gain in the long run comfort and wealth, then yeah, I I think you're probably missing the overarching.

And and frankly, it's it's not only to God's glory that he's asking you to do that, but it's for your own good for for situations like this. Because that amount of money with no with no work and no ethic and no, you know, no no proper Grounding? Yeah. No proper grounding. It will literally separate you and ruin you. And he knows that. He's not foolish. Yeah. So I suppose if I have to have a, like, a full reaction to number two, it would be there there may be some level of distinction in here. The truth is

you don't qualify for it. I don't. There there's not a niche in here that that would make sense for me to say, yes. This makes a this makes a ton. I should I should switch to gambling full time. No. Actually, that's good point. Yeah. We've created a very small catasm where some guy who might fit in there, but it's certainly not me. Yeah. Good luck for you. But, I mean, if we're being honest with each other, I I it's not it's just not working out. Number three, it's a fool's errand. People enter lotteries lured by the possibility of winning big, yet their chances of hitting the jackpot are often very, very minute. You take real money and buy with it a chance, said Piper. That chance is so infinitesimally small that the dollar is virtually lost. It's not virtually lost. It's realistically lost. The smaller amounts paid out more often are like a fog to keep you from seeing what is happening. That that turned a little weird at the end there for me. I think the truth is, yes, you're likely gonna lose your dollar. In in the grand scheme of things, it's you versus roughly 300,000,000 people. It's probably not gonna work out. So is that point saying that you shouldn't do it because your chances are tiny? Yes. That seems to be I I can't agree with that. Okay. Hit me. Well, because if you think about it, you're he that's saying don't take the risk because the odds of making it are little to none.

Look at every single person who tried to be a musician or a pro athlete. If they took that concept with everything they did, that's just ridiculous, if that makes sense. I know it pertains to gambling in the sense that but this point, standalone, like, don't do it because your shot is little to none.

Yeah. But again, the you're talking about comparing it to industries where they win if they can get talent that also wins. Not always gambling, they they win if you well, the music industry would be nothing if they had no artists. If if they could get every artist out there to fail, then they lose.

So they need to find some talents that win. Now they need to separate that from other talents that don't, but they create a competitive environment, but ultimately, they're looking for winners. With when it comes to the lottery, though, they win when everyone loses. I mean, it it's weekends like this where you have hundreds of thousands of people that are going out and buying tickets, and they're making the most money on lotteries where it looks like they're paying out the most.

No. Their their business model is you guys lose, we win. So so actually, it's it's funny Herrick says that because it does actually seem to be a yoked conversation. You know I'm saying? Like, if you're even if the if the if the opportunity is great, the odds are small, but the people that you're partnering with are both in it for the same reason. You're in there both to succeed to some level. That probably is a different conversation than I'm giving money to my enemy and my enemies but basically just taking it from me and laughing. Mhmm.

Yeah. Yeah. I I think I think out of the context of the game, like, I would agree I would agree with Daniel that that the odds are long is not a is not a good reason to not pursue something. Yeah. But but that is that also hinges on, your

your some level of work ethic, some level of talent, some level of, there's there's there is risk and chance. I agree with that too in some of those things. I suppose you at least have some level of influence, in that arena, whereas this is simply is your dollar there or is not? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. No. I I think that I think that makes sense. Yeah. When it comes to being a musician or an athlete, there's reward along the way. It it isn't just you either make it big or else you lived an entirely unsatisfactory life. Well, fair. Hopefully, you're doing it because you enjoy just creating music. You enjoy playing the game. It's the love of the game that drives you, not the not the payout at the end. Well, that's fair. So But I guess I just getting back to the point. He's like, don't do it because it's a one a million chance. Like, that in a nutshell is like, okay. At first glance, it's like, okay, it's kinda hard to follow because

that mentality doesn't work in almost any other arena except for what he's talking about right here. Right. It only applies to this. Although to his credit, that is what he's talking about. What he's talking about. But yeah. Using that as a reason is is I don't know. It just seems yeah. It would be a problem outside of this context, but to be fair, that's the context he's in. Alright. Number four. The system is built on the necessity of most people losing. Yeah. Okay. Alright. That's a lot. I think I'm disgusted. We went over there. We're good there. Number five, it preys on the poor. People in The US with annual take home incomes of $13,000 or less spend 9% or $645

of their income on lottery tickets each year according to a report from The Consumerist. Wow. Yeah. Okay. We talked about this last week in in in a bit of a broader context, but, like, that is people making the decision on believing a lie. Right? They they've they've believed the lie and and, you know, hear me when I say this. I grew up this way. Okay? This is not just me from my middle income chair talking. I grew up in this income bracket. You believe the lie that money would improve your life and make it better. And the truth of the matter is because of that, that figure is true. I mean, there's really nothing to argue with there. That is that is a fact because we believe that money will will change things for us. And sometimes it does change things for the positive, for the negative. I can't say that money doesn't make some certain things more, you know, easier.

But how you but I think what you're getting at here is, like, how you get that money very much makes a makes a difference on how that influences your life. Yeah. Yeah. Very much so. Very much so. The I mean, the guy that the guy that that that earns every cent off the sweat of his brow and through God's God's grace protects that with a certain level of, you know, I've been entrusted with this. Generally, when people I mean, ask ask there's a couple fellows in this room that that that actually had a decent amount of money when they were younger and ask them what happened to it.

Yeah. Happened to me. I I had a decent amount of cash when I was younger. Me too? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't go away. Ben and I. Ben and I and Chase. Ben and Herrick gave it away. Yeah. Well, Herrick, of course. What else do you do with it? Dave did the right thing. Me and Bubba sucked it up. Oh, boy. But I mean and and You got a sweet bed. Yeah. You got a bed. You know, that now you have to move around with you every time you move in your younger days. You're like, stupid bed. I got I got a van. Yeah.

Paid off my wife's debt. Oh, for heaven's sakes, Eric. Come on. Eric. What else do you do with it? Wrong and a van and be stupid with it like Ben and I were. So

so I I I think that's the point. And it it the actually, so you if you guys remember Bobby who we did a lot of the the the work with the homeless and stuff with, he was a formerly homeless guy, and he's one of his primary rules is do not do not give people money. Yeah. Is it like you you wanna take them out if they're hungry, you take them out of heat. You have a conversation with them. Like, but handing them handing them money is is at at sometimes is handing them a death sentence. Yeah. It's a tool of destruction. Yeah. And so, like, it it does prey on the poor. It does prey on on hope that the poor are

looking for. And they're they're willing to take because of how they see things, this seems like a reasonable option for them. Not because they necessarily think they're gonna win it. Right? But because it produces in their life a measure of hope Yeah. That says, I I won't, but I could. Are there better places to, to place that hope? Definitely. But I think that you can certainly understand how why people do that or what that looks like. Especially when you're up against problems that you can't solve, and this seems like a viable way, like, you thought through it and you don't wanna take out a second job and you don't wanna do x, y, or z. Like,

if even if it's a small shot, does it seem like a viable option here? Sure. Sure. But the the truth is is, like, solving problems like that doesn't necessarily solve problems. It doesn't do this is why everybody whoever pays off their credit card and doesn't fix the underlying spending problems has more money on their credit card three years later. It happens every time. I've in fact, I've done it three times. Three times in my life, I have played paid off all of my credit card debt, and you give it three years, and I'm I'm back maybe not as high, but pretty close. Because I I didn't really address the underlying spending stuff that I had going on, the the things that was causing me to go into debt and have to use credit cards. I simply didn't address it. And so, yeah, I get a tax return. It's got some big dollars on it, I can pay off a few credit cards and be happy with myself. And then my my pattern of behavior creates the same circumstance later on. And so long term, it's it doesn't put people in a positive situation even though in its in its short term, it sure feels like it should. Alright. Number number six, there is a better alternative.

Piper says that Americans who play the lottery are being taught to be fools, and that 21% of people surveyed by the Opinion Research Corporation felt that the lottery was a practical way to accumulate wealth. I feel like they didn't word that question correctly. There's no way or they don't understand what practical Hey, mate. You were a fool before he got there. You know what I'm saying? If you filled out that survey that way, you were a fool regardless of the guy taking the survey or not. Yeah. I've got I'm pretty much banking on the lottery. Yeah. This is like a practical and realistic way to bring in cash. I see 99% of the country's gone with the job route.

I'm going with collecting cans and lottery. If the $500 a year that on average all American households throw away on the lottery, is that right? $500 a year? That's gotta be right. That's apparently the average. Holy cats. That seems shifty. 500? I don't know. Yeah. That seems like that's where this guy's coming from. There's no way that's right. How many how many American households are there? Yeah. Right, man. You think people are armed to the teeth with how many American households there are? According to that ridiculous Facebook thing, there's 318,000,000

Americans. Right. But how many what's They all get $4,330,000. What's a house The math's not good. Same well, they're saying there's about three people. Right? $4. Point something. We can all get a calculator. Exactly. Okay. Let's say there's about a million households out there. A million? That's gotta be a 100,000,000. A 100 people per household. So that's a 100,000,000. What's that? That's a 100,000,000. Oh, yeah. Okay. So you got a 100,000,000 households. Hold on. Who's got an abacus? I think that's Move our decimal place over. Yeah. That's that's 10,000,000. No.

It's wait. Yeah. No. We're 100,000,000. Try not to don't don't don't don't people or a 100,000,000 households. Okay. Hold on. Hold on. 100,000,000 times how much a year? $500. 500 bones.

You're talking about $5,000,000,000. You're right. That's that's what gives that well, I suppose across all lotteries? No. 50,000,000,000. One, two, three. Think 500 zillion. There's too many zeros in the calculator for me to follow. There's a 123,200,000

households in the Northeast. So that's pretty good. That's pretty good. Okay. So it's it's 50,000,000,000. K. $50,000,000,000 gets paid out in the lottery every year? No. That gets taken in. Yeah. Okay. See, what they tell you is what the lottery prize is. They don't tell you how much they skimmed off the top. So that gets taken in. The state takes its cut.

It pays out some amount. A certain percentage. Yeah. But alright. Certainly go on. They just they just need a a bunch of glossy winners, a couple of them that they can publish so that they can entice everyone else. Okay. So alright. So anyway, it seems unrealistically. But anyway, says, if the $500 a year that on average all American households throw away on the lottery were invested in an index fund each year for twenty years, each family would have $24,000. Mhmm. Not maybe,

really. No. First of all, that that's that's not a it is a still a maybe. Yeah. Index funds are not They're based off the stock market. Yes. Yeah. So And second of all, does the stock market know how to handle an influx of $50,000,000,000 that wasn't there before? Actually, it it would drive in that drives down long term fixed fund prices, and so that return actually wouldn't probably be correct. Yeah. But in either case, that also that may be true, but what's $24 over twenty years to, a guy making $13,000 a year? That's right. Like, a single mom that's looking at her two kids and goes, I get $24 in twenty years. What's it do? It's not gonna matter. Right. Because it doesn't well, it it would it certainly would matter from a monetary perspective, but it isn't by hope. No. You know what I'm saying? Like, like, if that's if if he's right about, number five, which I think he is, number six is an irrelevant distinction because that isn't why people are playing the Yeah.

Hopeless people aren't known for their patience when it comes to monetary value. They're they're wanting to get the quick buck as quickly as possible. I would like that as well. Number seven. For the sake of quick money, government is undermining the virtue without which it cannot survive. That's too much of a tongue tie. I'm not really gonna go into that one. It doesn't matter. Anyway, play play the lottery. Buvo, what would you do if you want a billion and $0.5? I have things that I would want to do, but I guarantee you wouldn't happen.

I would try and give as much of that as I could reasonably figure out to, you know, the church and helping people and stuff like that and, you know, charities and all the good stuff. But to be honest, if I honestly got something that was $1,500,000,000, I would do a bunch of crap for me, a bunch of crap for my family, and a bunch of crap for my friends, and then pretend like I was gonna be really really nice and altruistic with it going forward. I don't think I would tell a soul if I won that much money. Oh, man. No. I would like I would I would have claim of the top I would a lawyer accept it. You wouldn't have a choice. No, you can. You can have a lawyer accept on your behalf. It it depends on the state. Yeah. Generally speaking. Yeah. Yeah. And like in Minnesota, you can do that. You have a lawyer accept on your behalf. I wouldn't You checked this out already, did you? I Yeah. No. I do. Get it's like 1,300,000,000. Of course, you're gonna be like, alright, well, you will look at it and just see like, alright, what if? But I mean, I haven't bought a ticket. I probably won't. But I mean, if I did, I wouldn't tell anybody.

I'd I'd probably wouldn't buy anything for a good while just so like because the last thing that I want is like everyone to get weird. Like like, hey, I want money. Like, no, dude. I'm good. Like, I don't know. Well, I here's the problem. Everybody hates you at Christmas time. Because no matter what you bought, it ain't 1,500,000,000 worth could've spent more. That's why that's why you don't tell them. That's why don't tell them. You bought me a wee. You could've bought me 10 wheez.

How dare you? I think I'd almost keep it quiet out of like fear of what would happen to my life if I, like, was open about it. Yeah. Like, I I the last thing I want is everyone to get weird around me. Like, I don't want my family to, like, shift on me. Like, I don't know. I'd I'd probably I mean, I could say all this now, but if it happened, I mean, it could completely change. I'd grow a mega beard. I would probably like just try to be quite out of fear that like someone would try to come after me. Well, that's the thing. I don't even know how you protect that amount of money. Yeah, don't know. You know what I'm saying? Like, how do you show that amongst how many financial accounts, you know, that would even be insured? Here's the deal. As you find three stewards and you split it up equally among them and you have them come back and bring it back to you and see what they did. And hopefully, nobody buried it. Yeah. And you say, look, when I returned, I'd like to see what happened. Yeah. You find the one guy that put it in the ground, you say, you sniveling loser.

There. I feel like I've heard this story before. Hey, Mike, you figure out a better way to do it than Jesus' parable. I feel like the dishonest manager did well. I'm just saying. From a monetary perspective, yeah, he did. Alright. Hey, man. I'd buy people gift cards for Christmas and then, like, a bunch of ridiculous stuff they don't want. That's way too expensive. 2,000. It's like, hey, dad. I got you a $100 gift card and a $10,000 cake. Like, hey, dad. I got you 200 or $2,010

gift cards. Exactly. Right. Here's a roll of pennies. I just I I just feel like, I mean, even if you went hog wild for a year, what are you gonna chew through? A couple? 200,000,000? Even if you went just ape crazy for a year, did everything you wanted to do. That's it. Yeah. Did you chew through $200,000,000, you still got another 800,000,000 to go. Here's the thing. I would do that though. Fudge peanut butter no bakes no longer satisfy me. What?

I had the option of buying anything in that store for my own pleasure. Before I had that opportunity, fudge peanut butter no bakes would have really changed my world. And now I'm at the point where I'm like, yeah. Yeah. It does alright. Yeah. But it doesn't do anything for me. I want a gold plated toilet. That's what makes me happy. Yeah. I buy a Chewbacca suit day one. I'd probably buy an RV that turned into a boat. And I just like park it in people's backyard ponds and they just wake up and see my RV boat just chilling in their pond. Because nothing just screams, I won the lottery like an RV boat car. That's true. And then you could whip out a wad of cash and say, let's just say you forgot the whole thing. This never happened. Yeah. Yeah. See, I feel like I'd be the impractical dude that bought a jet but then forgot to buy a pilot.

And then just like You're driving it down the freeway. Exactly. Like, I find myself like, hey, man. Remember that jet I bought? Yes. A silly person. And then I go to the jet and I'm just like, wait a minute. I can't find Pilot this thing. Hey, am I even licensed to fly this thing? I don't know what's going on. That would be cool. I wouldn't have stewardesses or I put up. You call now flight attendants, excuse me. I wouldn't have any of that stuff. Are you talking about buying people? Well, like Who are this? Hiring. Not socially acceptable. No. Hiring people. I forgot to buy a pilot. That's what you said. Yeah. Technically, I wouldn't I'd be buying his services and his ability to fly. Yeah. That's not how you looked at it and he knows. Well

And then If I have if I have $1,500,000,000, I think I'm willing to try and buy someone. Yeah. And just own that person. Well, I'll just pray that you don't win at least. Yeah. There's a reason I haven't bought a ticket, gentlemen. Like, there's a reason and it's because I know myself well enough to know that I would be awful with that. Yeah. And I know God wouldn't give it to me because he He knows. He does not trust me with that kind of stuff. Yeah. And he knows me well enough to know that Isn't that the scary part? Like, you won the lottery, I mean, my immediate thought would be, why do you hate me, Lord? Yeah. Exactly. Know what I'm saying? Why have you let me into ruin?

It's like, god, I I feel like this is way too much temptation. Here's the things. I don't know that that's true. I don't know that god would not give to you. If you decided you were gonna close your mind and say, hey, I'm just gonna give it a shot and do what I wanna do and say, well, God, you keep it from me. Just like you walk into the strip club with your eyes and they say It was a whole bad decision. I hope I don't run into the naked ladies in here. I hope there's no ladies in here. The Lord will handle this thing. Close them all, Lord. Yeah. And that's Send them robes. I'm heading in. And that's why I know I have not bought a ticket.

I'm just saying. That thought process is a failure in life. I hope I I would hope god would not give me that much money. That would be just insane. Like, I've I don't even know. God is saying. I'll probably build my cat a house. I don't under I don't know what I would do. Hey, man. I'd be the best you build your cat a $900,000,000 house, Life would be so messed up because like when you went for like

let's say you like you go looking for a snowblower, you're like, you're usually like prices snowblowers and be like, well, I probably don't want the lowest in one, but I certainly can't afford the high end one. But all your choices would be gone. Like, if you have 1,500,000,000, you buy the best of what's there. Right? You know, you look at the $10 bucket of nails and you go, give me the 50. Because I have 1,500,000,000. And I don't I don't do that many nails, but I don't really It generates stupidity. Yeah. You know, it's crazy because, I I look at this way. I it's a weird analogy. I play a game on my Xbox, and I was, like, working hard to level up. Right? And I was playing online. This dude popped in, and I leveled up 2,000 levels in five seconds. And I left that feeling like, man, the challenge is gone. Right. Like, there's nothing left to work for. I feel like if that happened, it'd be like right now, I'm, like, chipping away, trying to get there, you know, making a little money, just trying to fund things. And if I got, like, that kind of money, be like, where's the challenge now? Like, I no longer need this. I guess the temptation would be like, I no longer need this business Yeah. Because I've I've already done it. So I feel like all the challenges that would be the thing for me. The temptation, like, to fall into is that there would be no drive left. It yeah. There'd be no reason to do something because I literally don't have to.

Right. Right. Nintendo is to life as Game Genie is to lottery. Yes. Yeah. Yep. It's like the Game Shark of life. Right. It sounds like the great idea. You get the Game Genie, you're like, I'm gonna tear this up. And then you beat it and you're like Yeah. After like, after the first ten minutes, you've gone through the game and destroyed it. You're like, well, now what? Yeah. Now I know what Mario two looks like. Is it bad that I love doing that? Yeah. But that's my favorite part of video games. You can always pick up a different game and like just do it. But with life, you don't get another life to try again. Like, you get that 1,300,000,000, you're set. You don't need to do anything. And it's like, oh, I beat the game. Like, challenge makes me upset. Like, I enjoy cheating my way through the entire game. And I have many games that can prove that. I feel like I feel like life would be a different different perspective. That's probably fair. You don't necessarily have to lose that way. I mean, a lot of people who go through the lottery and and win it end up very depressed because of exactly what you're describing Yeah.

But there's an alternative is you could take it and then basically, you die. Your your life as you've known it is over. But you can find and and help partner with others who are who are doing things that are just needing a little bit of cash that that you can add to. Yeah. Things like bringing clean drinking water in Africa or or building infrastructure, things like that. Yeah. And I agree with that. They're looking for, you know, just simple things like that. That can be your life now as you just take someone in and help giving them a little bit extra. Yep. And I and I hear that. I think I think that's what the temptation, though, is like, you because I could do that. But there's a temptation there to be like, I I could, but I mean, I'm already good. Like, why would I want to? Mhmm. But I do see your point, and that's what I would hope I would do or anyone would do is like Right. To actually do something positive with that. But track record of the lottery winners Mhmm. How many have actually done that? Yeah. Yeah. Well, I I kind of feel like that's what you did with your musical career is you're like, okay, this didn't work out for me. But now with the life that I've got in front of me, how can I help others, become successful with their music career? That's fair. So, I mean, you know, the attitude's certainly here. It's present. Just scares me. I think my dating life would be different.

I don't know what that means. And what I mean by that is, like I wanna know what it means. What the heck, boo boo boo boo Here's the deal. No. I mean this from the perspective, like, right now That's where you buy people again. Hey. Don't start talking about that situation. I mean, you really you really walked into that one. You're gonna buy a pilot now. My date of life will be great. No. Here's what I no. That's this is awful because, like, right now right now, I'm trying to just be a generally good dude and, like, try and become, you know, more of a more of a good guy for for from many perspectives. Like, trying to become more of a of a Christ centered man. Well, got it. Yep. And in my dating life, same way, trying to become more of a Christ centered man and figure out that way. I don't think I would keep doing that. Like legit, and this is awful to say, but it's just me admitting honesty of myself. I'd probably be like, hey, do you wanna go on a date? Well, no. Well, I have $1,300,000,000 that says you do. I got a Lambo. I just like walk in and throw my hands free like, you're going on a date. Exactly. Like, I would no longer I would no longer lack any confidence in any situation.

Like, people I would no longer be afraid to ask anybody for anything because I'd be like, hey. Do you wanna do this for me? They'd go, I'd like, do you remember that I have $1,300,000,000? They'd go, well, yeah. Well, sweet. You're gonna do that for me. Right? Well, yeah. Okay. Perfect. And then walk away from this situation. So there was a do you guys remember that guy who, was in the news because he jacked up that medication for AIDS patients? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Martin Martin Scrella or something is his name. So anyway Oh my goodness. There was a story about him where some lady went on a Tinder date with him. She she ends up with this guy on Tinder. Those always turn out well. Oh, that's awesome. And

and realizes it's him and goes because it seems interesting. And he he seemed like a like a legitimately interesting guy, but he went somewhere and bought a $100 thing of tea, glass of tea, like a drink that's a 100 bones. And and it it kind of makes me Is it like infused with gold? I can't remember the description of it. Whatever it was. It only had a name attached to it. Didn't stand out to me. Okay. Hey, man. I watched an episode of Houseware this girl poisoned her husband with gold. Yeah. So that's foolish. Just for a heads up. Don't drink gold tea. Honest cornflakes. Continue on. Gold pea tea is fine though. It's good. Delicious. Does anybody else watch House? I mean, it's good show. I watch House and yeah. Okay. Yeah. Showing I prefer watching Apartment. I would just I would just buy House if I had the money.

Like you, man. It's in Hugh Laurie? Yeah. Hey, man. You can't buy people. Yeah. Alright. I think we've talked about that on many occasions now. You can't buy people. I realize you're upset because you parked your jet front end style at the Whataburger, and you didn't realize that you have to get someone to tow you back out. Right? I would overlook that kind of It's

a rough day. That would be awesome. Buba has $1,500,000 and forgot to hire a tax collector. I mean, after taxes, you probably have, like, $400 with being honest. Hey, man. I'd be pretty upset. I don't know if you understand the tax system. Don't think it's quite that stupid. Okay.

The tax man shows up at Daniel's house. He's like, need 80% of your money. Boy, that seems stiff, but okay. All is fair. God bless the free market. Give Caesar what is his.

Anyway, what was I telling that story about that guy? Oh, yeah. Like 100 RT. Yeah. So it wasn't enough to make the connection. Right? Like, he just looked goofy. He just you know, a guy who's she said she refused I here's I didn't get this part of the story. She said, he bought it and offered her a chance to take a drink of it and she refused. And I thought, I would most certainly try it. At least give it a shot. Yeah. Like, that's just dumb. It's gonna be some dang good tea. So he put her off by buying the $100 tea? No. She offered. She offered him Or he offered He offered her some of the tea. Right. But, like, he put her off as in, like, she didn't wanna date him any longer because of the $100 tea. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Okay. That's because he didn't go far enough. He he went middle ground. Someone who has billions of dollars shouldn't be offering a $100 thing of tea. That's He's on his way to pretty much He should've bought her a tea, not just offered her a sip. He doesn't care. It does not matter that he the $100 tea, that's like a spit in the face. He should've bought the entire establishment and then offered And then gave it to her. Right. Exactly. This is now your tea place. This is no longer a, hey, you know, you can you can possibly have a chance to try this tea. Oh. If he really wanted to flaunt his money, he would have gone, hey, this tea is a $100. By the way, I own the building we're in right now. So whatever you wanna do. Okay. Shoot. Is that why people always ask me to pray and stuff? Because they think I have lots of prayers.

Maybe. What are you even talking about? I don't know where that switched, but sure. I still sleep with a teddy bear. Hey, man. This is really you could buy a really big teddy bear at 1,300,000,000. Let me tell you the story about Rodin. I would like to hear a story about a bridge.

You've been listening to life in the past. Bridge of 1,300,000,000. It'd be a sweet bridge. Just on land. No water. Just in the middle of nowhere. Just build a bridge. Drive up it and down it. Is everything alright over there? Yeah. Okay. Just reminiscing on what we would do with $1,300,000,000. Build a bridge. I hear what you're saying. The desert. Are you ready here, man? Yeah. Go ahead. Dear life in the path.

Thirty years ago, when I was an army officer, my wife, quotes, went crazy. She had an affair and wound up getting pregnant. When I got out of the army, she saw the man one more time before he moved and got pregnant again. Man's a potent deal. We had a child together later. When I found out my eldest son didn't have the correct blood type, I confronted her, and she admitted it. I then had all my children tested and realized only the last one is mine. I love the other two as well as my son, and I would not destroy his or the other boy's lives. My wife and I had counseling, and it helped some. The problem is I feel like my life has been destroyed, and I don't know what to do. Man, I need some help. Play the lottery.

It's a fix all. Yeah. So but here's the thing. It's legitimately, not knowing what to do with your circumstance sounds right to me.

Like, if you're feeling the sense of betrayal, feeling the sense of misunderstanding your I your identity, your relationships with with some of your kids, I get all those things.

This is gonna be tough to digest, but, like, to a certain extent, those are fake things. Like, they're things that, you feel like you should feel. Right? But you don't have to look at any of those kids differently. Like, I get that you that if that your circumstances, the physical circumstances altered. Right? But, like,

it doesn't have to be different. It just feels like it should because of the change in what you know. And that's often true with information. Like, we we feel, a certain way, and then we find out something that doesn't have to change how we feel about anything. But it it because the what we know has altered it, now it feels like we are foolish or blind for not changing our reaction or that we look we look stupid, because it didn't impact how we felt. And so

the thing is is is I would say you have some legitimate things to deal with with your wife. I'm glad counseling is helping. I would suggest continuing that For the most part, because it will it will help you to digest your circumstances. Right? Things that you can't put words to, things that you have trouble expressing emotionally. Like, sometimes there are emotions that run so deep. Like, they it is simply difficult to put words. A lot of times, folks that that that have depression

have this. Like, they're they they can they can talk in colors or they can talk in images, but it's very difficult to pinpoint exactly what they're feeling. And I can I can certainly get how a circumstance like this will do this? But but don't feel like

there is something wrong about how you feel towards those kids. And that that how you feel about them has to change because of the information that you have. It doesn't have to. It doesn't make you a fool. It doesn't make you whatever to to feel like it has to change because the information has come to light. Right? Like, how you feel about people does not actually have to to alter. So, like, just feel how you feel and and go with that and then continue to work through those things with your with your wife

to to to kind of put some to meat on what you're actually reacting to and how to how to healthily move forward. That would my reaction. Yeah. I think there's a lot of truth in that. And and, actually, that's a very hard lesson, for anybody to learn.

But it is it is true across the board. Like, when you when you've been cheated on or lied to or screwed over by a friend of yours or whatever, like, people will look at you as if you are foolish if you do not change your opinion on them. And the truth of the matter is is, like, you're almost foolish if you do. You know what I'm saying? Like, if you choose to let that color everything that you do from here on out, you're the one that's bought into the sin and decided to swim in that pool and and go down with the ship. And, like, that's a really hard stance to take because you're like, people will think that I'm a fool or that I'm willing to be taken advantage of. And and and, you know, the truth of the matter is sometimes it's there's more joy in being taken advantage of, you know, than there is than there is coloring a person saying, look, I I I can't love you anymore. I can't operate like this anymore. And that is a very hard reality to go through. But, if you can nail that one, you got a life full of joy that, you know, that most people won't even come close to.

Let's see. Secular says, I assume you and your wife had joint counseling after you learned about her repeated infidelities. While your faith in women may have been shaken, he didn't say that, your life has not been destroyed. Feeling as you do, it's time for you to privately discuss your feelings with another licensed mental health professional. After that, you will be better equipped to rationally decide how to move forward.

Boy, that wasn't helpful at all. No. Yeah. I I feel like they're pointing him in the direction of divorce with that. Yeah. Well, the option of divorce. I think they're

they're trying to stay or secular seems trying to stay out of a full on cement decision of you need to go get divorced or something like that. You need to, go to a singular counselor that has nothing to do with your, your spouse and then figure it out from there. I think they're trying to to cement that they have the option. Here's a hard thing you have to admit to when you when you follow down that path is that your love was conditional. Yeah.

And so, like, you basically have to say and and that that is true in most most divorce situations. Now granted, there's some caveats. But in most situations when when you when you have to work so hard to get through this, you're basically having to admit that your love was conditional based on their love. And which means that you didn't have love to start with. It's not what it was. Right? Your love is you don't love a person because you love them. You love them because of what they give you or what they do for you or who they are to you. And like, there's some elements of that that make love easier when those things are present. But like the truth of the matter is, if you wanna call what you have love and your love doesn't equal that, you sure don't have it. And like that makes love a lot harder, but it makes it a lot truer and a lot harder to shake. And so like I I I think that's that that gets to be a stickier conversation because you have to admit that your your source of that relationship was only what was best for you. And which means that you weren't you weren't actually participating in it. You were just taking what you wanted.

And that that sucks. That does suck. That's difficult. I I I here's the thing. It's like it's it's that's a heavy that's a heavy understanding. And I think it's it is difficult for us to,

I don't know, to have to to have to be reminded to to look at my relationships through that lens. I think let me put it. I need reminded of that. I think I have to be reminded. It is too easy for me to react to people based upon, how I feel. And it's not, sometimes I'll say that that feelings can't be trusted, but the the truth is also is that they are not I am more invested in how I feel than oftentimes how I'm invested in how everybody else feels, and then that clouds how I see things. Right? Like, I'm likely to see a circumstance

that makes me feel bad or that it degrades me. It's the same reason somebody can do say something that's rather innocuous, but it's offensive to you, and now you think that guy's a bad guy. He based upon what he said. Right? So my filter was guy said thing about me that hurt my feelings. He's a bad guy. It wasn't near that deep, but it was because that's how that's what I heard, and then now my my lenses are colored that way. And so, I I it it it pulls some of the, some of the flavor of life that I think God gave us from to to be devoid of emotion. I don't think you you're not asking to be robotic, but it's to understand

if my perspective is more invested in the other person on the other side of my relationship, I am far less likely to to misappropriate their motives the next time they do something that hurts my feelings or that harms me or that does something that I that I don't like. Yeah. Well and and see, actually, it it it's funny because if you try to put the weight of that love in perspective to how you treat your current relationships and you go,

that's how God loves me. And there's no question there. That's just how he operates towards me. That puts not only your love and your ability to love in perspective, but how God's love actually interacts with you. And you you you discounted it. You took what God's love was and you you looked at it with 20% and and you completely missed exactly what it was. And it is much heavier and much deeper deeper than you want it to be because that puts it in a scary position where you have a God that really does love you regardless and you can't shake that. And that's that's hard. And and I think that's what's difficult sometimes when our in our relationships with God is when we when we use certain words from the Bible, whether it's, believe or whether it's,

love, we we have we're using those words the way that we use them and do them, not the way that God otherwise uses them. And so, like, that's that's some of the real risk on on how we describe that relationship and how we understand what it means to follow Jesus is that, we're using our words, and then God doesn't doesn't fit our expected definition,

and then we get rubbed the wrong way about it. And so, I I think that's that's where we have to be careful. Like, if that is the perfect picture, then how how should I be using the word love? Or how should I understand the word believe and that type of thing? It it causes us to have to think about what those words are and what they actually imply versus, shallow ways in which we use them or

we we talk about this a lot. Right? Belief as a, hey. I believe that we we take as I agree with it versus my physical reality has changed because of what this is. And what I have done or what I do has altered because I believe this to be true. Yeah. So that's and that's significantly different than, oh, yeah. God, I can agree with that. Sure. That's way different. That's true. Here we go. Dear life from the path,

my sister-in-law is getting married soon. Originally, she asked my four year old daughter, Emma in parentheses, to be her flower girl. Emma was very excited. Mhmm. A few weeks ago, I asked what my daughter needed to be fitted for her dress. My sister-in-law then informed me they had chosen my niece to be the flower girl the day after she asked Emma. No one ever mentioned it to us. Bummer. It was left to me to tell my daughter, and she was devastated. She still cries about it. I'm holding in so much anger and hurt that I've been avoiding the family so there won't be any fighting close to the big day. Am I wrong to be upset with my sister-in-law and mother-in-law for excluding my little girl and not telling her themselves? Please see previous advice. Yeah. Yeah. Seriously. Yeah. Here's the deal. Like, you're seeing the world correctly. That was crappy. Yeah. That was crappy thing to do and your daughter's gonna have to own up to some real hurt. There's some junky stuff on there. But like, the worst thing you can do is let your daughter own that hurt. You know what I'm saying? Call it what it is. Say, look, a bad thing happened. Yeah, this sucks. You know, the crying, you know, we gotta talk about how that hurt your feelings because that's a true and honest reaction. But like, is it is this making anybody happier? You know what I'm saying, hon? We don't have to live like this. This is the thing that happened, and and we're gonna call it what it is, and we're gonna go grab

a bagel and a fruit juice, and we're we're gonna get the day rolling, and and that's it. That's it. There's no reason to sit here and let her be part of your stewing anger pot. You gotta let it go, and you gotta teach your daughter how to let it go. Bad things are gonna happen the rest of her life, and how you teach her how to deal with those things is on you. And you're choosing to go with a stirring pot of anger opposed to there's joy in this life apart from being the flower girl. I know it feels devastating at the moment because I mean, seriously, that is gonna crush a four year old girl. Yeah. You gotta, I mean, you gotta give that the weight that it is. A four year old girl, that's a big, hairy deal. Mhmm. But on the other hand, like, she's she's you're not trying to wear a crown of of woes. Right? Like, you and so it's foolish to let your kids sit there and own that because you feel like more anger. It needs to be felt on the other end of the argument. That you gotta let that go. No no nobody suggests retaliation? Boys? Anybody? No. No. No. No retaliation. No. Yeah. You have the right to be upset, but you have the responsibility to care. Mike, what do think? Do you do you say do you say something?

Do you say something to the to the sister-in-law? What can you really say? It's not gonna change anything. I'd I'd let him know. Yeah. Hey, look. What you did was mean, it was pretty reprehensible, but, you know Yeah. Here's the deal. You gotta live your life. If it's one of you guys and y'all did that, and yeah, we'd be having a conversation about it. That was that that was extremely crappy thing you did and if I'm being honest, I think you owe my daughter an apology. Yeah. And I don't have to be around for it but you owe her, you owe that to her. That's fair. I would say that.

And if they choose not to, they choose not to. But I gotta be willing, I gotta be able to let that go. Mhmm. After that conversation. Either way. Yeah. I said my piece. Maybe you didn't realize that the the the cut that you caused and how deep it was. But here is the deal. And it's not I'm not upset at you because I have to deal with this because it's my pleasure as a father to have to walk my daughter through these things and I will do these things. And I'm glad it's me and not you doing this because apparently you're a callous boob. But on the other hand, you hurt a little girl and and you need to do something about that. You need to have a reaction to that. Yeah. Yeah. I I I don't think there's anything wrong with saying something to somebody about it. Anybody else? Nope. I agree with that. K. Agreed.

Let's see. Secular's advice is, he asked, the question was, am I wrong to be upset with my sister and mother-in-law? Blah blah blah. Secular says, no. You're not. The way it was handled was extremely insensitive. Your sister-in-law owes you an explanation for what happened and your daughter an apology. Yeah. To be honest, I the explanation I don't care about. No. I agree. I don't care. I don't care about that. You owe an apology, and and I expect it to be done, but, really what happened and why? It's already done. The problems, it's happened, and we're done with that now. Yeah. And it really isn't your thing to argue about. Right? Like, your motivation for doing x, y, or z is not

it it it does not matter. What what am I gonna argue with about whether your motivation is correct? It's your flower girl at your wedding. Yeah. It's it's ultimately their choice. You're you're not gonna be able to change that. Yeah. And so so that that that the reason I said at the offset, like, see previous question is, like, that's that's the very thing. Right? Like, the thought that you owe me an explanation comes from the fact that you were or someone you loved was hurt, not because in reality, they owe you an explanation. Yeah. You just feel like it would it would justify and and generally, it doesn't. It doesn't it doesn't actually help. It either makes you feel worse or give you something to grab onto. It's where petty all marriage petty marriage fights start with that. People overexplain things, and you grab onto something that makes them just a little bit more wrong than they were before. And then you hammer around this minor point that has nothing to do with anything else that's going on, and then you're you're an hour burned on your life with the love of your life, and it really sucks, and you should have just given up already. Pretty much the nature of it. Ain't no doubt about that. Yeah.

Here we go. One more. K. Dear life from the past, I will be receiving some money from a court settlement soon. Only five friends were true friends and stood by me. This is great already. These are my true friends.

They assisted me during the two years I was totally destitute. They all know I'm involved in a lawsuit and that I will receive compensation. My question is, should I tell them how much I'm getting? I don't like to lie, but the idea of revealing my monetary status makes me uncomfortable. I never promised any of them money, so that's not an issue. I will cheerfully comp compensate them all for their loyalty and ongoing daily ways. What should I do or say when they ask how much I received? I want to be I don't want to be perceived as rude,

uncertain in the South. I will compensate them. Do they gain an employer? Yeah. This is like boovah's attempt to buy people. You know what I'm saying? Hey, man. I should've used the word hire. I'm sorry. Yeah. But you didn't. You're right. I didn't. I used buy. I I lived to it. So,

yeah, just just say, well so I'll tell you what I would do. I don't know if this is good advice or not, but what I would probably do is if to people who I didn't wanna share it with you say, hey. Was it a did you get your settlements? Like, yeah. How much was it? It was big money. Yeah. I'd probably say in such a way where, like, you would don't know whether I'm joking or not. And I would just continue to say that. It's big money. Yeah. But how much was it? Big money. Yeah. Yeah. Big. It was big. It was pretty big. And if the kind of people I'm very wealthy. If these are your true friends that are are gonna get upset at that answer, I I really don't know how a true friend they are if they're gonna get freaking out at at you for just saying, hey, yeah. I got lots of money. Yeah. Like, if they Sweet deal. If they said, you're gonna tell us, Craig. Because they're like, no. I'm not. Hey, Craig. You remember those rides I gave you when you were destitute?

Yeah. I wanna know exactly how much you got from that settlement because I have a bill that I've been racking up as your true friend. You owe me $8,472 in gas money. It's a lot of gas. Interest on top of that. Oh, interest. Yeah. He's just a jerk. Craig

had a faraway job, and he had to keep going to it. 27.6% interest. That's right. I work in Panama. It's not my problem. It's your problem. You forgot to hire a pilot. Yeah. Yeah. Because here's the deal. It's like, let's say once y'all won big monies from some sort of, say, one. From a court settlement, it's not really one, I guess. So I don't know. I don't care. I don't care how much money you have. Yeah. Okay. So what there's a part of me that does care slightly because I wanna know if you call me up asking for money. And

and you have money and you're just robbing me of money. I I and here's the thing. That's the lack of joy in my life that I care about that. That is my problem that I'm hanging on to. And I I want to let that go. I want to be the kind of guy that does not care what you have, why you have it. You call me up and say, I need a ride. I say, yes, sir. Wheels are heading your way. So here's the thing. There's practical considerations where if everyone brings something and you bring a potato salad and everyone else brings like three potato salads, you wanna be able to look at me and say, hey, man, what's with your imbalance of potato salad? But the truth is is you have no right to make practical decisions based upon my money. That's true. It's not your business. True. You like my potato salad or don't you? Right. Hey, man. Just a heads up. That sounds like an awful potluck. Here's the thing. Where everybody brings a bunch of potato salad and one dude brings one thing of potato salad? Randy, you suck at office potlucks.

Yeah. We all actually suck at this because there's nothing but potato salad here. Plus, the worst part is the guy that only made the one, he made the best stuff. Right? And then we got three bowls of He used the red skinned potatoes, and it's not that yellow mustard nasty stuff. He used the good stuff. Dijon, and I'm out. Why not just go to each of the friends just individually and say, hey, Looks like I'm gonna be winning this thing. Is there anything that I need to to pay you back for over the over the past couple of years that you've that you've stood by me, that you've been very generous with me? Is there anything outspoken that or unspoken that

that I can compensate you for or something like that? Just As my true friend. You know, going you can offer them. If they're if they're sitting there thinking, hey, I you know, I I was lifting you up during the dark times, and I'm and I'm hoping for some kind of a windfall during the good times, then at least the then that expectation can have a conversation where it comes out, and you can provide that. Otherwise, it might be sitting there in the back burner. Hey. It it kinda clouds the the definition of friendship, but a lot of people have that sort thing. Actually, I kinda like Herrick's deal because what he's done is he's turned in the he's turned by his reaction, the jerk friend into not a jerk. Yeah. Like, your posturing says, hey, you may be a jerk to me. I'm just gonna ask you if I can give you the money, and then now you don't have to be a jerk, and we can still be friends. I'd probably even do it twice. I know it sounds weird just because, a lot of times a person's gonna at at the first offset, they might not be thinking about it or something might be off. But, yeah, I'll go to them twice and and just say, hey. Is there something missing that that I need to, pay back for and and make sure that that we're still in good shape? I'm trying to maintain our relationship, and and sometimes, yeah, money's involved in that. That does not make any logical sense, but it is the darnedest best answer that I've heard. Yeah. I agree. Yeah.

Actually, you like that too. I don't know that I here's what I was thinking of when Herrick was talking was is like, I I this is just personally me, but I have a hard time being generous to people who have money. And that's a that's that's the wrong tact. You know what I'm saying? Like, where you were destined to it, I'm like, you need a ride? Sure. You need to grab something neat. I got this. You know what? Cover this thing. But then when they come into some cash, I'm like, what do you need to call me for? Why don't you take a bus? You know, you have money? Yeah, right. You pick up a guy. You'd I'd give a ride to a homeless guy in 10 degree weather walking downtown. But if I know a guy that's, you know, got a million dollar house and he's like, hey, I'm really struggling with my garage door. Can you come over and take a look at it? I'm like, why don't you just hire a guy? Why are trying to stiff me? Yeah. I would have that oh, that's bad. Crap. Well, that's that's the thing. It's like if you look at it honestly, that would be your actual reaction and you need to repent of that. That's that's that's not a good way to live. No. That's true. I would certainly do it though. Dang. Okay. Yeah. That's gotta go. Yeah. The the thing is a lot of people will have that and they'll just hold it and never really examine it. And at least having a conversation allows them to examine it and and decide, okay. Do I really wanna act on that? Do I wanna say, oh, yeah. Go ahead and put pay me back, or do I wanna say, well, you know what? Maybe I should just let that thing go and then not hold it against them. That's true. Latency is a process is a is a problem. Like, not letting things kinda lie dormant under the under the radar and not dealing with them. Even those types of things, you might as well just run up on it. Mhmm. So you're saying I should go over and fix the garage door and then have a conversation with him and say, hey, rich friend. Seriously, dude. Well, no. If it's something that you should repent of, there's no reason to bring it up. Yeah. But he needs to change his ways. No, he doesn't. He's He does. You were his friend and he reached out to me. I don't have time to be helping his his rich rear end. They got plenty of. Tell him that. Yeah. Have that conversation. No. I need to. Unless he pays you big to fix it. Yeah. Well, he's like, hey, really. I appreciate it. I I was going to pay the original garage man $12,000 but instead I'll give it to you. You say, I I would love to I'll take your gift. Thank you for generosity. I'll be right over, sir. Yeah. I'm sorry I peed on the side of your house. That's

a spiteful thing from earlier. And I Hey, Go real bad. I think I have my reaction to Repent two too because I had the situation where I thought to myself, hey, man. What if I just get each one of my friends that has helped me in my destitution that I get them all a really, really sincere, nice gift?

Oh, just some T shirt. Something small. No. Like, something small means a lot to them. Right? Like, if somebody and legitimately, the the friends that know me well enough know exactly what to get me. I don't care what amount of money they spend on it. It is awesome. Like, I had a friend who recently got me something from from the Disney place that was a Star Wars deal. And I don't think it was super expensive, but it was a seriously sincere and awesome gift. I love it. And that was cool to me. And I feel like that's exactly what I would do. But then I started examining what I was thinking, and I thought, I think I'm trying to do this so I don't have to spend a lot of money on them. I'm trying to find a very sincere thing to get them, not to actually be sincere, but that way they feel like we've, come to terms on something. I don't actually have to let drop a lot of bones.

So I think I might need to repent of my situation. Do you a real punk, boobeth? I really am. I mean, Ben and I were just talking about hypotheticals where we might be jerks. But No. Like, is the deal. What I might do jerk. Like, if for some reason, I owed I owed people money or or I felt like I owed them something because they had done something very good for me. My normal MO is to go get them something super nice that's not super expensive. And I just now realized that might possibly be because I don't want to spend a lot of money. And I am a jerk. You know you know, there there's probably is a lesson on the other side of that though, which is

assuming that your friends are not trying to book you for cash, being able to accept things without a sense of debt. Right? Where where you feel where people's Yeah. Keeping people's graciousness to you does not create an urgency or a sense of debt in your life where you feel like you have to like, there's a scales of, retribution of which you are responsible for setting right. Can you look at someone's generosity

and accept it in an honest way without feeling like, oh, I hope something comes up so that I can pay them back? The the thing is is, like, you would you would help them if they're in that same circumstance, but it's not a part of the equation. It simply is that's just what people do. And when when someone else needs help, like, you just you just are able to accept that without having to to put a burden either upon yourself or upon the relationship because of that. And that's extremely difficult. Yeah. It's a difficult because it feels like there's like, you've incurred a debt, whether it is a debt of friendship, whether it's a debt of money.

And being able to receive gifts, received grace is hard. In fact, I know a number of people that struggle in their relationship with God for that exact same reason is they simply cannot look at mercy in that way. They cannot look at grace and, without, like, physically feeling a sense of debt of which they do not know how to interact with their father in that way. Whereas I might look at my earthly dad, and he might do something like that. And I could say and I don't feel that debt, but I it's just something that my dad does, and I accept it graciously and say thank you. And I look at my at God the father,

and this if I understand rightly his description of who I am and what has had to be done on my behalf, it simply bears a weight. And this is why we spend a lot of times asking for forgiveness for the same thing old over and over and over again because with that burden still exists in our lives when it doesn't have to. We simply don't know how to accept gifts. We don't know how to accept gracious things from people. And, and I've seen a lot of people who who don't get over that, and they they start to see God differently than him than who he is because of they're seeing him through the weight that they put on themselves because of it. And it's hard. It's hard to get past that except I and I stink at it. I stink at accepting gifts. I I'm awkward. I don't know how to say thank you in a realistic way without feeling like

they think that I owe somebody something. Like, I don't I stink at this terribly. I'm very bad. But, like, it's it is a place where where in addition to giving freely, you need to learn to receive freely, from the grace of others and from God, and that's hard. I think it's hard. I agree.

The I've I've struggled with that myself with the whole receiving gifts and things like that. And the people that have tried to to help teach me on that, and I think kind of from a from a god perspective too has been, you know, the the most

impactful thing I've ever had to do to learn how to receive gifts is giving them. If you can if you can find yourself on the other end of that and understanding the emotions of the person and the thought process of the person giving the gift, you know, whether that be joy for themselves by giving it and and and not actually receiving anything back, it makes you take a step back to seeing that from a receiving end also. So, you know, just years ago, I mean, somebody tried to give me, something, and I can't remember what specifically, but I I was almost furious at them trying to give me this this thing because I I was awfully receiving it. And then

God kinda put on my heart to start giving more stuff away, and obviously, I don't do nearly enough, but just doing those small things at a time, I started seeing it from the flip side, and it it really helped me to to put myself in that mindset of the giver rather than just the receiver. And being a more generous giver helped me to

get closer to where I wanna be when it comes to receiving those gifts also. Yeah. Yeah. It's our deal. Hey, you've listening live from The Path. Thanks for hanging out with us on this balmy Monday evening. Really do appreciate it. You can check us out every day by going to lifeforthepath.org. You can see past clips from the show, interviews. There might be something to buy out there. I haven't been out there lately. It sounds alright, though. It's a wast eland. No. That's true. Actually, it's it's newer fancy. I fancied it up a bit. That's true. Alright. Some fancy. Go dig on it. You can follow the stuff on we're not we don't you know, we throw stuff on the social media. We're not very often. Follow other people that are more active. You know what we need? We need a brand coach. That's what we need. Daniel Johnson, what do you know about branding?

Oh, I'm learning. It's a process. So so if people wanted to connect, more of what you got going, is there any way for them to to check out and see what you're up to? At the moment, I think our social media campaign's going live in February.

So it's just est.911nine. That will all be live across all social media platforms probably next month. You always talk like this? Like what? I can't follow with what you're What? You're saying campaigns and going live and stuff. What do you So right now, our social media is still in the ground phase because we're still fairly new. Okay. You're saying it's not on right now? Not yet. It'll all go live. This is not a world problem. This is a Mike problem. I'm just I just don't understand what you're saying. All this social media is gonna be up and running in February. Yeah. Okay. Cool. Just keep an eye out in February. Look up Establish ninety one nineteen. Just EST dot 9119 across all social media, that's where you're gonna find us. Otherwise, we could just give you a phone call direct. Yes. What's the number? That's my cell phone number. I'm with you so far. Yeah. Have have my cell number. 649.

Alright. Alright. Once we know that stuff goes live, we'll we'll reiterate those things on the show so you guys can check out and see what Daniel's going on. Daniel, it's good to see you. Thanks for coming on the show, buddy. Yeah. Thanks, man. You've listening to Live From The Path. We will catch you next week. In the meantime, be faithful in the means. God will handle the ends. You've been listening to Live From The Path.