Live from the Pathway Studios in Johnston proper. You are live from the Path. And you're listening to Live From The Path. We're coming from the Pathway Studios here in Johnston proper. Hey, man. You need a comb for that beard? I got getting my fingernails. That's a god's comb. You need a comb. Yeah. What's happening? Hey, I didn't I didn't start the show yet with your banter. Start just start over again. Go ahead, sir. Sorry. Oh,

I forgot how it goes. Anyway, hey, welcome to Life From The Path. Hey, It's been like a two week sabbatical. I hope you've spent it wisely on a Monday night doing laundry or I thought I might have fleas at my place. Oh, sorry. Yeah. So so yeah. So far, we have beard combs and fleas. Anyway, so I mean, yeah yeah, I hope you used your time off responsibly. Now you can while the hours away, listen to life in the path. Here's what we got going on on the show tonight. For starters, Crystal Joy is in studio. She's the author of the book, Completely Captivated.

It's a cool book. It's a it's a I'll she'll explain it better than I will, but I read it this past week and it's like a collection of, of real real life love stories. And one of the cool things, about it is is it causes you to remember, not only of your own story, but but probably of, like, the couples that you've met around you or your parents or whatever that, like, everybody's story is beautiful. Like like, there's, we often forget some of the details and some of the information and some of the circumstances that got us to be with the person we're with or beyond a certain someone or whatever. And,

anyway, it was a really interesting book. So she's she's here to kinda tell you about that, kinda where the stories came from, how she goes about putting those together, and and why you should read it. And so, we're gonna we're gonna talk to her, find out more about her life and, she's also got other books in the hopper that I'm interested in. So we're gonna get to that. And, so Mike Mike's been cooking up a a game. Tell tell me about the game, Mike. Well, so I because of the subject that we're talking about today, I the first question that came to my mind that I wanted to ask Crystal was is like, did you have anybody submit stories where you're like, no, man. That's that's not love at all. That person that person terrible to you. You know? And then I thought, well, what what is love? If if love were to come in, you know, right in front of me, would I know it? And then, of course, then the white White Snake song came in my head. And so I thought we're gonna do a game, and the game is called, is this love? And I'm gonna give you scenario, and then based on the information I've told you, you're gonna have to determine whether this is love or not. Something tells me that this is not gonna represent the, I don't know, the age old pursuit of what is love. It it's Like by Hathaway?

What? What is love? No. What happened here? No. No. No. I thought we're going to another 87. No. No. No. No. Alright. Never mind. Anyway, this game is gonna reveal I mean, where if you by the time the game is done, you're gonna know exactly what love is and how to apply it to your life. I can't Boof, I can't deal with you. I was gonna tell you, you've got some Pope style tonight. What do you can you give me a preview on the Pope style advice? Here here's a preview. Every college student that I've run into needs to figure out their identity. Like, it's it's drive me nuts at how many times I have to have 02:00 in the morning conversations with people about how much more they are worth than the scenario they are in or that they put themselves in. We really need to hash out what Jesus tells us who we are, and I'm really getting tired of it. Okay. Brilliant. So someone has mistaken Buva for the poop. Bad idea. And he and he's got no choice to get them off his lawn or is you don't really have a lawn, do you? No. I don't I now I do. I don't There's a bunch of inflatables out there. Okay. Santas and stuff. Alright. So outside of his lawn, he's got to give some level of advice and it's gonna have to do with, know who you are. They gotta go. Okay. Got it. That's the pope style advice. We also might get to some secular versus Solomon, and we'll do some advice on dear life and the path, and, we'll see what we know and what the world knows. Alright. Let's let's talk to, to Crystal. Crystal Joy, thank you for coming on live from The Path. Thanks for having me. So I'm excited to have you. You you popped up, in my Facebook feed a couple times. I don't remember like like you haunted me like a specter is the way I like to think of it. Yes. So you came up once and I thought, oh, hey, I should reach out to her, and see if she'd be willing to come on the show. And then mysteriously, your name and information about you writing this book showed up back on my Facebook feed and I thought I thought if somebody's going to haunt you, you might as well have them all in the program, because that's interesting. So, first of all, tell us,

for folks who aren't familiar with you or the book, tell us a little bit about yourself, and then a little bit about the book, Completely Captivated. Awesome. Yeah. Well, I, I'm a stay at home mom. I have two little ones at home. I have a two year old, 2.5 year old and a one year old, so they keep me pretty busy. But I also write. I used to be a junior high teacher and I absolutely loved it. But then I really felt like God was calling me to pursue writing. And so I I loved the students. The school district was amazing.

And I talked it over with my husband, and I really felt like I was being called elsewhere. And so we, took a leap of faith and said, alright, god. Let's we'll just figure this out. And so, I started writing full time, and then now it's pretty much part time with having the two little ones at home running around as well. But I get the best of both worlds. It's so much fun. Now, wait. Do you have, do you have, like, a writing space? Like, do you can you write anywhere or do you have to have a certain vibe around you? Candles up and, Tony Tony Jones on, like, what what's the what do you got? I actually write in a coffee house.

So I get when I I work during nap time, so I'm at home then. But otherwise, like, when I can get out of the house sometimes in the morning and I, work at a coffee house, a a local coffee house called Dun Brothers in Bettendorf. Sweet. That's where it happens. It is. And it's busy and chaotic. And for some reason, I know that's crazy, but it works for me. Like, I can't work in pure silence. That would just drive me crazy. For some reason, all I can envision is somebody hiding underneath the blanket, you know, away from the children be like, I'm in my space. No one can see me. In my writing zone. I might picture that sometimes, but no, I've never really done it. But but, like, are you thinking, like, wherever in the the younger kids' comics where they're always reading under the blankets with a flashlight, but you're thinking that adult style Yeah. Trying to get work done? Yeah. I'm in I'm in my zone. You know, I might use that sometime now that you just suggested it. Okay. Okay. The magic happens at the Dunbros and, alright. So tell me about, Completely Captivated.

So Completely Captivated started when I was just trying to get traditionally published with another novel and I thought, you know, I really wanna start connecting with readers because going from teaching to writing, the solitude is the hardest part. Like, I love being social. I love talking to people. I love writing, but it's it's hard just sitting there in that quiet. Right? So I was like, you know, it'd be really cool if I could start writing real stories and putting them on my website and then they have to do with love. So I started asking couples to send me their stories and I've had so much fun because every couple is so different and every story that's been sent into me is so different. And at first, they all started off happily ever after because that's what love is. Right? Right. But is it? Is it? Is it? I don't know. So then I, went out to dinner with some friends once and I had a friend say, have you ever considered writing stories that don't end happily? And I'm like, well, actually, I have thought about it, but would anyone send me those stories? And I had a couple of them who had been through recent breakups were like, well, yeah, I'd send you my story. So I thought, you know, if people are interested in giving me their stories, I would be happy to write them because, really,

love or relationships really are messy and complicated, and they're hard. Even if you have a great relationship with someone, it's still hard. And every couple has that. So I decided, you know what? I don't wanna write all happily ever after stories anymore. I'm actually gonna make a collection of stories where some do end happily and some don't because that's real. Yeah. And that that's one of the things that I I really liked about the book was, like, first of all, knowing where the stories were coming from. Like, these are real stories about real people. And and and one of the things that was that was cool is thinking about, just I don't think of all the people that you've ever met. Right? Buva, do you have them in your mind now? Yes. Have them. Okay. Good. That's what was hoping for. So so if it just if you look around and think of the people that you interact with on a daily basis and think like they have a unique love story, Like they're whether it is a, they're currently married or they've gone through relationships, like chances are, like, they have a a an interesting unique love story full of, I don't know, like cool anecdotes and

people's attempts to impress each other and harsh words and kind words and like, it's just a dimension of the world that I think I I take for granted. What you tend to hear from and maybe this is different for other people, but like I tend to only know one side of people's marriage.

You know, maybe it's the guy that's talking to me most of the time. Right? So like, I only know the stories he tells. My wife tells way better stories than I tell. Yeah. And they're way different stories than I tell. Like, I I mine are generally one liner type stories of when someone fell on their butt. My wife has cool stories thing though, that that falling on your butt story always kills. No. That's People love that stuff. It's a god pleaser. I go with the tried and true. The woman is willing to experiment out into other avenues. But like, know, she remembers the way the the the an eyebrow raise that the kids gave or, you know, remembers, dates that we want and that that I can't remember at all, like, just don't occur to me. And it made me think that, like, how deep relationships are and and cool stories exist in everybody's life and, like, reading these in completely captivated, like, caused me to actually look some some people's relationships differently and my own probably as well. Like, I started to realize, my first reaction was, hey. I don't, I don't know if I have cool stories like that. But as I started to think about it, thought, actually, we got a ton of cool stories. I get that a lot. Do you? Mhmm. So so, like, how do, when you when you're kinda going through this, if people are sharing their stories with you, did you have to do any,

any any prodding or poking or encouraging to try to get them to share or to think about the relationship in a different way? Yeah. I mean, I start off with some questions on my website, but then I ask for more. Like, do you remember what that person was wearing back then? You know? And some of the older stories, you get some pretty cool stuff of what they were of what they were wearing, or what do you think that person would have said or done? And it's crazy because some people remember dialogue. Like, they'll remember exactly what somebody said to them in that moment, and then other people will have all these visceral details of, like, what was going on. Like, there were birds in the air and there was a frog jumping in the water. I mean, it's just amazing what people actually remember, and it's so different. And it's especially different from the guy to the girl. So, originally, all the stories are written from a girl's perspective. But recently, I've started writing more stories from a guy's perspective and a girl's perspective. And I've even actually had a couple just from the guys that's been a little more tough. Right. They remember completely different details. I've actually just,

this summer, I did two different stories for couples. They were surprises. One was, one of my best friends got married this summer, her fiance wanted to do a story for me to give her on their wedding day. And so I only got his details. And then another story I did for my pastor, at Adventure Christian Community, and he he wanted me to write a story for their anniversary. And so and then I got only his details too.

So that was really nerve wracking because when you only get one side, like you said, it's hard because you're like, well, what if I'm missing something or what if they remember something totally different? Because even my love story people will ask, like, have you, is it in the collection? I'm like, well, no. Because my husband and I remember the story so differently that I'm like, well, I'm I'm sure that happened. He's like, oh, I don't know. I don't think that did. That would scare me to death. Oh, man. Yeah. Because I feel like my wife wouldn't say, hey. We remember it differently. She would say, you remember it wrong. Yeah. Yeah. That's not how I So you are just incorrect. Yeah. Well, it might be said that way too. Yeah. We've never even been to the Chili's. That's right. I was like, come on. Woman, we was in the Chili's. I'm certain of it. She pulled the receipt. Yes. I kept the receipt. This is exactly where we Because I've always loved you and this is why I have the Chili's receipt. What do you love? Oh, man, I don't know. I'm so bad at this. No. Yes. I

couldn't I don't know if I could even propose to be on that side of our of our story to feel like I I told it right. Right. Or gave it justice. Like, the things I I remember obscure details that don't have anything to do with the like, you're right. Like, I I would be what actually oh, so this gets me into a question now that I'm ruminating on this. Like, has anybody that you know of had a had a reaction to any of the details that were in the story, like, that would that surprised them or they thought, they reacted like it did miss a big thing or has, for the most part, been pretty even cute? It's been pretty yeah. It's been pretty easy as far as, like, getting the details. I mean, there have been small things like someone, you know, just saying, oh, you know, if she wouldn't have worn, like, a red bandana, she would have worn a blue one or,

you know, just small details like that or if, like, I'm trying to think of some some other ones. For the most part, it's just been pretty easy because I get a lot of those details ahead of time. And then if I don't, I'll just highlight them in the story, and then I'll ask the couple before I actually send it to them to read. Wow. But because I don't wanna get it wrong either. It's nerve racking. You're like, oh gosh. You wanna especially, like, an engagement or a wedding, like, it's you wanna make sure that you are capturing the essence of what really happened so that they are like, oh, yeah. You know? That's I remember that. I feel like I was there again. Hey, man. Am I cheating in my relationship if I write down details? Well, yeah, boo. I mean, how can you how can you claim duncery like I've done? Well, I'm just saying, like written down all the details. Like, every time something significant happens between the two of us, I make certain to write it down. No. No. Like, whether it's she she tells me something that's her favorite, I write it down immediately. Or something happens that, like, she was, I really felt loved in that situation or I felt like this was a really cool thing between us, I make sure I write down everything. Am I trying get fire? Great idea, Buba. Yeah. Yeah. That is a good idea. Yeah. I don't tell. I think that's the first time in, like, eight years you guys have ever said that. You've not produced very many great ideas. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Today's

Writing down cool things your lady does, that's the right that's the right move. It's a red letter day, boo. You can use them in your future love story. See? Yeah. Exactly. Score. So the the book is completely captivated. You can go to, crystaljoybooks.com and, you can pick the book up there. Otherwise, it's also where all, legit books are sold. Right? So you can pick it up at, at Amazon. Did I see you were at a a Barnes and Noble book signing recently? Yes. Yep. So you can get it at Barnes and Noble or on Nook too. Probably easiest to get it on Nook, but I can get it at Barnes and Noble too. Okay. Sweet. Yeah. So so you can go pick that up. So one of the things I was thinking is as as people think about their own stories and and what you were saying was that they weren't, sometimes people don't remember that well, like, depending on who they are in the, in the relationship,

or they don't remember the same things. But I I also got to thinking, like, for people who say I don't have a cool story, whether they ever have it kind of turned into a story or not, it seems like it would be helpful in relationships to go back and try to remember some of the depth or some of the nuance or some of the the memories that are surrounded kind of where our relationships came from. And so like as you go through this process, has it created any any, I don't know, any advice for people who are just trying to who who might otherwise say, yeah, my relationship was nothing special. If if otherwise, I might try to make the case that everybody has a unique story,

How can people how can people remember that? What are some tools that people or ways that people can think to to think back upon the relationship and actually realize that they do have a unique story? A lot of times, I think it's when you just talk to somebody else. So whether that's your significant other or, you know, your parents or part of your family, siblings, and just ask them, you know, what do you remember about that particular time? And a lot of times people will remember things that you don't and then you'll go, oh, that was really special. Because you're right. Our memory fades, you know, and we only remember certain details. But every love story really is special, and I think I get that a lot is where people go, well, I, you know, I would send you something, but I don't really have anything special. And I'm like, well, well, tell me, you know, how did you meet your significant other? And it's what's funny is you get a lot of times a lot of people will start talking and then they're like, oh, yeah. I mean, even when they're talking to me, they'll remember details they they didn't think about before. My husband's, boss asked him the other day about some of my love stories, and he said his boss probably spent about an hour retelling their love story when he originally had said, well, you know, it's nothing nothing special. Like, how do you get, how do you remember all these details? And then, you know, an hour later, of course, he remembered most of them.

So it's just going back and really sitting down and thinking about what happened. Well, that's it's kinda funny to think that, like, you know, if if we'd spend any amount of time thinking about it, that that information is still there. Right? Like but but normally, we're only willing to put in, say, thirty seconds, like, where'd you meet your wife? You know, and I'll say, blah blah blah. This is where we met. And, you know, and I and I've put ten seconds worth of thought in it, you know, produced what's on the top level of my brain and said that's it. Realizing that, like, that was the biggest deal to me when it happened. Right. Like, it was huge. Obviously, it changed my life in a in a an enormous way. And there was way more going on than I ever sell it. Right? And so, like, there there's something about capturing those stories and putting them all together from all different, you know, walks of people and backgrounds and those kind of thing that, like, man, that it's it's just got a lot of power in a small amount of space, you know, just to to show things that, like it's just like when you were in high school, you remember everything just meant everything. Right? Five minutes would pass, and it'd be the heaviest five minutes of your whole life. And you're like, man, they looked at me funny when I turned the corner, I knew they hated me. No. Right. Yeah. And so, like and that's not the case anymore. Right? You're like, you walk down the hall of your office building and a guy looks at you funny, you're like, man, he must have had a bad burrito. Too bad. You know? And and you pass it off as if it's nothing. But, like, that exact same interaction happens to you at 15 and it it will crush or make your world. Right? And so, like, huge spans of life and the and the direction of which your life was going were happening around this time.

And and the same is true for the day that I that I, you know, first met my wife and I pass it off as if it's nothing. And so it's amazing to me on on how much of these stories and and even small amounts of words can carry just a huge depth, of where your life was and what and what it turned out to be. Yeah. I I mean, that's why a lot of the stories, you know, will go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows because typically, that's what you remember the most. Yeah. No doubt. That yeah. Actually, that's a that's a good way to put that is like, the extremes kind of carry and you lose like like, you you keep the margins, but you lose some

of the meat, right? Some of the real special moments that are in those kind of big, like, everyone wants to think back and remember their wedding day. Can I remember what I was doing the day before my wedding? Because like that had been a real exciting day, No. Right? It wasn't the day of, but you're the the the things that you're worried about, the things that you're thinking about, the, the way that you're looking at this at this lovely woman who's agreed to be with you, like, I'd have been interested to to what I was thinking and what was going on around me. I don't recall any of that because there's no one there to take pictures and stuff. Yeah. Right. Oh, man. Bouva, write it down and show us all. Yeah. Bouva, you're like a journalist on your own life.

Only with her. Right. Wait. Do you record your own stuff? Nope. Just her. Well, you I think you should. Don't you think don't you think you should include your own stuff? She'd be very interested in that. Yeah. Well, like, I include my reactions. Like, with the our first date, I wrote down what I thought when I saw her. Oh. The night I met her, I wrote down what I thought when I saw I wrote down what I thought when I was sitting there talking to her. She came to to youth group to talk to the kids, about, some of the ministry she was doing, some of the missions trips she's done. And I was sitting in the corner like an idiot, just kind of sitting there, jaw slacked looking at her, and trying to come up with a reason to get her number. But,

I I remember that stuff. You could do the standard, I'd like to be in a prayer circle. No. I She was Holy Let's hold hands. She was she was actually going to to to Madagascar and I I made up a Well, I didn't This sounds awful. I wasn't lying to her but I I didn't really know if it was a 100% true but So so I told her that I had traveled

for work and made it seem like it was a much bigger deal than it was because I'd only traveled for work like twice. But I was like, I've been to Asia before once. I probably have some frequent flyer miles. Maybe I can help you get there. And I had no idea if I even had a Miles card, let alone like if I could even use those miles for her. But I told her, let me get your number from you, and I'll give you a call tomorrow if I can get those frequent flyer miles. That's And that worked? It totally worked. Uh-huh. Turns out that she had had a total crush on me from like three months earlier, so I whatever I would have said, probably would have gotten enough of that was the sly thing I came up with. And then I called Baby, I might have some freaking flyer miles for you. Right? I'm like, here's the deal. Like, was sitting there praying. I'm like, God, there's no way I'm gonna let her go without, like, continuing this. Like, there's no way. And so What the Lord said? Use the frequent flyer miles. Exactly. God goes, hey, man. She's she's gonna be a significant part of your life. I'm like, I got this, God. Frequent flyer miles. We're gonna get a number this way. Sound. Right? No. No. I got this one. Goes, hey, man. This is gonna be a real cool story. And I go, I got it. Frequent flyer miles delta. Let's go. Like, that's what I had. I got a number there. Hey, that's a God that can do all things, you know. He

shows up through frequent flyer miles and goes, yeah, give him your number. Alright. Anyway, good job, Bufa. Yeah. That's a way to keep track of that stuff. I'm very impressed. Yeah. I feel like I should write your story someday. I think you should. Here's the deal. I do most of this stuff in fear of not being impressive. Like, I don't wanna be the guy that's that's a a schmuck in a relationship, like, want I want to be the best boyfriend she's ever had and will ever have and hopefully the best husband. Right? And so I don't want to look back and say, man, I really wish I would have done that that time. And I try and do stuff beforehand and and now. So far it's worked. No. Yeah. I mean, so far I'm doing alright. I look like a bridge troll, so there's no other reason she's drop dead gorgeous,

and I'm the size of her vehicle. So there's no reason other than journaling boyfriend. That's right. I saw it. I journal and I have Frequent flyer miles from journaling boyfriend. That's what I Here's the title of your story right there. I got it. Yes. You Frequent flyer and the journaling boyfriend. If you would read numbers, I'm telling you, buried in the book of numbers is the key to success. And it's frequent flyer miles of journaling. Don't But no, nobody wanna read it. I called Delta. I called I think I called a couple airlines that I've never even flown and I'm like, have I flown your airline before? I really need to get a gal to Madagascar. That's right. Let me get down to the brass brass tacks American Airlines. You don't know me. I don't know you. But I need this girl to go to Madagascar. Air Scandinavia. I've never been near your country nor your airline. I wanna the now?

Yeah. I told her I told her the, a couple weeks after we started dating, I was like, I hope you realize I had no idea if I had frequent flyer or if I was gonna be able to get you Madagascar. She goes, it didn't matter what you said. I was gonna give you my number. I'm like, score. Wow. Yeah. The Lord put me in a light in her eyes. So Say, thanks. Once again, you said you were gonna use the frequent flyer miles. Say, egos, I don't care. I got Whatever you say. Just don't say something stupid or mean, you'll be fine. I'm like, alright, God. I'll say frequent flyer miles. The book is Completely Captivated, by Crystal Joy. Go to crystaljoybooks.com and you can check that out. And hey, there there's, there's other stories out on the website and there's also a spot where you can catch up,

with some of the couples that are in the book, and you can find out about, additional information about them. You also have a section now, here's my mistake. I go out there and I look and I say, hey, other books going on. And like there's a synopsis of a couple of the books happening and I thought, oh, man, shoot, I'm not gonna be able to read those before the interview. It turns out they ain't out yet. Oh. So I mean, that's what the that's what the sailors call off the hook. I did not, I'm not in the in the downer for not having not read the books. But so you have a synopsis of a couple of fiction books out there Mhmm. That are still pending publishing. Right? Correct. Yes. So Shakalar is completely done. Been trying to negotiate a contract, with the publishing company for that one. But, yeah, it's completely completely written. Yeah. Charlie's so Charlie is the main character, and he's been in my head for a really, really long time. So it was it was so nice to finally get that story done. But that's a story of a a man who has made a lot of mistakes,

and he finds someone who loves him despite the mistakes he's made in his past. Yeah. That one looks like a grabber. Like, the synopsis that's out on the website, like, one of the things I liked about and and part of the reason I'm bringing them up because I'm excited for them, is they there's some difficult premises here for some for some folks. Like, the the the the premises of the book are, you know, flawed characters or, you know, potentially good characters in flawed or at least, difficult situations

and then and watching people navigate through them and it has a it's a cool tie to, kind of the overview of Completely Captivated because you're you're it's just dealing with real people. Right? Like, the the beauty in real things, seeing the tragedy in real things, seeing the honesty in dealing with real things, you don't have to have the the situations are are real to someone. Like like, you're not too distant from some of these things that are going on or could have gone on or even minor changes in your own life could have led you in paths that sounded like these circumstances. And, and that's one of the things I really like to see is is people actually go through those and work through them, and come out on the other side. And sometimes it's not a it's not a rosy other side, it's just another side. But like I I the the premise of both of the books, that you have pending,

seem very interesting and very cool and very honest to me. So, and so those are those are pending negotiation. Hopefully, go well. The the wheels get greased and those get out because I'm excited for those. I appreciate that. Should we make a phone call? We're fairly high up in the media. Yeah. Yeah. I I mean I'll probably get some frequent flyer miles. I was gonna offer that we can do the old pen and scribe method to produce this book. I mean, we'll we'll get a couple copies done every six months. Yes. Alright. Let's do it. Copies? You'll be yeah. Yeah. Hey, you love writing, Buba. This is right up your alley. Man, I never said my handwriting was good. No. That's what makes them unique. Yeah. And honest. Gotcha. Okay. I was gonna say I did a when she was telling that story where she did a book signing at the Barnes and Noble or whatever, I'm like, I tried that once. I said, I think that's but

it turns out Buy a couple copies of another book You can't sit there and sign Oprah's books and expect people to be happy with you. So that was the end of that. Alright. So once again, it's crystaljoybooks.com. We've been talking with Crystal Joy. Pick up Completely Captivated. You can get it I got it on the, read it on the e reader, reads well. It's a quick read, like you can get through it pretty easily. And, even if you don't have a long time to sit down, you can, read the individual stories as they go. There's a couple of surprises in there, a lot of real touching moments, and some good reminders that that all of us unique,

the relationships that you maybe far from the beginning of, and don't realize how interesting they were, how cool they were. And I really like the idea of kind of asking around and say, hey, look, what do you remember about when we were dating? That that seems like a really cool way to kind of see your life, in a in a unique way and, to kind of rekindle the things that you remember about it, and and watch all that kind of merge together in a really cool story that you, may have forgotten that you had. So, again, that's Crystal Joy and Completely Captivated. Go to crystaljoybooks.com and you can pick that up. Crystal is going to hang out in the studio. We've got some other stuff going on and she's going to chime in, correct Moova when he's wrong. And, that's the setup for the day. So, so far so good, Crystal. Thanks for coming in. Thank you. Alright. Mike, Mike, are you ready for this thing? Yeah. Yeah. So here here's my here's my question. Is is what is love? Right? Like if

like if people say, like, I have a captivating love story or me and this person, this person are in love. How do you even know, you know, if you're in love? And so what I did is I came I came up with some scenarios for everyone to look at, and I'm gonna I'm gonna kinda give you the basis of a situation. And based on what I've told you, you're gonna say is I'm gonna say, is this love? And you're gonna answer yes or no. Now, to be fair, I'm gonna add more details to the story after you answered to see whether you're correct or not. Wait. So it says we're being set up really is what you're saying? Yep. The game is Every time. Mike sets you up. That's the game. For looking like a fool about love. It doesn't have as much traction as the way that I've sold it. So the game is entitled Is This Love, Ben? Shoot. I didn't craft I didn't craft an opening. You've stumbled upon America's

second fastest growing Internet game show, Is This Love? Yeah. Featuring Mike Poston. Okay. And our special guest, Crystal Joy. Good luck, Crystal. Okay. Ready? Is This Love? Question one. A man sets up a romantic dinner for his 10 marriage anniversary filled with candles, chocolates, and gifts. Is this love?

Crystal. I think he's saying, sorry. I missed the real anniversary yesterday, and I'm making up for it now. So I'm gonna go with no. Oh, man. Crystal's in with it's not love, it's regret. Probably not love. Boova. My answer is not nearly as credible

because I was gonna say yes and just go, hey, chocolate. That's that's all I got. Oh, I know it was love That's chocolate. Man, do I not understand marriage? I thought chocolates was a heck yeah. No. That no. This is right. That's an apology idea. Yeah. I think it's an I'm sorry. I'm willing to stick my neck out in this situation and say, yes, this is love. With Bem. Hit me re hit me with the deets again. A man sets up a romantic dinner for his 10 marriage anniversary filled with candles, chocolates and gifts. Is this love? Yeah. He's overdone it. That's not love. I I'm I'm with Crystal on this Can you alright. Fine. He's overdone it. I'm sticking with yes. The correct answer is no. His anniversary isn't until next month. Oh. Oh. Come on. No. This is this is not love. Not an attempt.

Question Wait, Mike, is there a point system to this game? Yeah. I win. Okay. Noted. Question two. So whose love is it anyway? A beautiful young woman takes pictures of all of her food she's buying at the store and sends it to her significant other other. Is this love? Mhmm. Hoover. Hoover first knew I was gonna kick. This is just the mundane everyday of marriage and yes, this is love. Uva says, yes, this is love. Ben. Yeah. I think she's I think she's gently trying to remind him

of something to do with food. So I that's nice. That's loving. That yeah. That's love. Ben goes with love. I mean Crystal. I'm gonna have to agree. I think there's something special with her seeing her those pictures of food. Yes. Unanimous for the whole foods love. Everyone says, yes. This is love. A beautiful young woman takes pictures of all the food she's buying, at the store and sends it to her significant other. Is this love? Yes. They are the ingredients to his favorite meal. Yeah, buddy. Oh. Well done crowd. I knew it. Hey, we're good at this game except for booba. Question three. There's five questions total. If you hate this game, you hang on a little tighter. Okay. Done with finals. Question three. A handsome young man takes pictures of all the food he's buying at the store and text it to to a lady. Is this love? Ben Foose. No. No. He's being passive aggressive in some manner of art. This is not love. This is is not love. Crystal. I'm gonna say no. He's probably telling her what he wants for her to cook ham. So no. This love is a sharp knife.

Booba. Oh, man. This is love. I want I wanna care for this man. I want him to be in love. But I'm a say no, because he's probably saying, hey, these are the these ingredients, the meal I'd like for you to come and get tonight, please. No. A handsome man takes a pictures of all the food he's buying at the store and texts it to a lady. Is this love? No. He lives with his mom and he's 40. Oh. Oh, I see. Oh, nice. I see. Yeah. No. That was even worse than I thought it was gonna be. That one is not love. Poor Randy. Is there an intermission? Yeah. Sure.

Question four. Excellent. Question four on, is this love? Sorry about that. Is is this love? Okay. I I no. That's what I'm gonna do for now. I got it. Is this love? An old man goes through his wife's purse early in the morning before she awakes, putting all the contents on the table. Is this love? Crystal. Oh. This is a hard one. Oh.

I'm wondering what he's searching for. An old man goes through his wife's purse early in the morning before she awakes, putting all the contents on the table. Is this look? I'm gonna say, yes. He's searching for

something to give him a clue on a date, which, okay, maybe he forgot, but at least he's searching and he cares, and that would be loving. A long backstory for this old movie. I'm a writer. I'm sorry. Crystal sees into his soul. I I

see him to his pockets. I I say yes because he's grabbing the keys for his wife's car to go start it. Oh. Oh. Oh. Bubba. He's gonna love her practically and make sure her car is warm when she goes to work. Bubba also goes with yes, Ben. Now the old man part is a ruse. It's still a dude. He's in five fighting around for something that he's not supposed to. That's not love. He's looking for gum without asking. He needs cash money. Yeah. He was at the casino all night. He's got $20 Sweetheart, I'm full of life savings again. An old man goes to his wife's purse early in the morning before she awakes, putting all the contents on the table. Is this love? Yes. He's trying to find her keys. She loses them almost every day Okay. And he's trying to help her early in the morning. Yeah, buddy. Close. Yeah, buddy. Nicely done, boo. That's what's up. Final question for oh, is this love? Is that what I did? Weirder. No. Is this love? No. You're not doing your I forgot it already. I thought we had something, but then we didn't. My intermission was better than that. Is this love? Final question.

A guy listens to Life From The Path every morning on the way to work. Is this love? Pooh. No. You need to find something better. Pooh says no. Every morning? Every morning. It's too much. Maybe once a week to catch up on the show, but not every day. It's my turn? Yeah. Yes. That's love. He wants to be a better man. Yeah. Yeah. Crystal. Yes. I agree. That dedication right A

guy listens the third way man. A guy listens to Life on the Path every morning on the way to work. Is is this love? Yes. Obviously. Yes. The whole Yeah. No backstory needed. That's a solid man. Yeah. Absolutely. That's it, man. Hold on. I was gonna say, you gonna play? I gotta work on it. I gotta work look at what's You were slipping slowly into Barry White and it got weird. Okay. I don't know. I might Is this love? I might rig this game up again. We'll see. It's the right way to do it. There's no other good reason to have this game on unless Crystal's on, but like I guess I'll have to come back. Yeah. I guess so. Agreed. You could hey, you are you willing to Skype in? That way, you don't have to travel. I'll travel. Get I to see my family. Okay. It's okay. It's a good excuse. Alright, Mike. Whenever you wanna do this, we gotta give Crystal a couple weeks heads up. No problem. Okay. Alright. Alright. Alright. Alright. Hold on.

And now for America's fastest growing game show. Secular or Solomon? This why I wasn't the Is This is not the fastest growing game show? It's because Secular is It's behind Secular or Solomon. Growing game show. Well, that makes sense. Is this love a second? Oh, is it? Yeah. Hey hey, you've stumbled upon, after listening to America's second fastest growing game show, this is now America's fastest growing Internet game show, Secular, versus Solomon. Here's the premise of the game. We're gonna give you a proverb, a bit of wisdom. And the point is to figure out, like, do we know where our wisdom is coming from? Do you think Ben Franklin said everything from the Bible?

Or do, like, do when people when we say a true thing, a bit of a a bit of wisdom and we think it's biblical, is it actually biblical? So here's what I'm gonna do. I'll give you the bit of wisdom and you tell me if it is a secular bit of wisdom or Solomon, if it's from the Bible. And if it's a secular bit of wisdom, I want the country of origin. We need to know where this wisdom is being dealt out. That sound good? Let's do this. Everybody understand the rules? Yes. Okay. Alright. Here we go. Oh, I've lost it. Alright. Here we go. Secular versus Solomon starting with Buva. A prudent man does not make the goat his gardener. A prudent man does not make the goat his gardener secular

or Solomon. Solomon Proverbs 14. He's in with Solomon Proverbs 14. Mike. Ben. Secular Pakistan. Wait. Say it again. Secular Pakistan. Pakistani?

Secular Pakistani. Okay. There you go. Got I've been in a country I just your mic your microphone wasn't working. Right. Alright. So Mike's in with secular Pakistan. A prudent man does not make the goat his gardener. Secular or Solomon? Crystal Joy. I think it's biblical. So you're in with Solomon? Yes. Solomon. Alright. Here we go. You've been sucked into Buva's bravado. He does this when he doesn't know the answer. I do it when regardless. A prudent man does not make the goat his gardener. It is secular hungry. I heard Secular hungry. You you caught me with prudent.

That's what got me too. Yep. Come on, man. The you're the pied piper of lies, booba. Sorry. I just go off the adjectives of your Proverbs one and I go whenever wise or knowledgeable or equitable or prudent shows up. You've read Proverbs. Ain't nothing about no goat being the You never know. Although, actually, goats generally just eat the weeds. And so it actually would be a pretty sweet move to let the goat be the gardener. So the Hungarians are incorrect? Yeah. Like, I got I got a couple goats at home and I thought I know. It was like a cartoon. I thought I'd get them and then tie them up places and they'd mow the grass. And they don't. They just eat all the weeds and leave the grass to grow. And so it's like six foot tall grass around them. Oh, man. You're goats. So anyway, the Hungarians nailed it. Alright. Fine. I still say the points. Maybe the people in Hungary grow something particular that the goats enjoy, like rose. I can't expand upon that, Ben. Okay. Alright. Fair enough. Alright. Second verse of Solomon. Let's see. When the tempest passes, wicked is no more, but the righteous is established forever.

When the tempest passes, the wicked is no more, but the righteous is established forever. Secular or Solomon, Mike? Oh, man. No. I was Getting those buzzwords in there. Tempest passes. I mean, what version of the bible are you using, Ben? English Standard Version. Okay. Then that's gonna be Solomon. Nice distinction. Crystal Joy, secular or Solomon? Solomon.

Solomon? Alright. She's in for Solomon. Buva. Solomon. Proverbs five. Proverbs five. Specifically. Alright. When the tempest passes, the wicked is no more, but the righteous is established forever. It is indeed Solomon. Proverbs 10. Proverbs 10. I was five away. Hey, your behavior

is a 10 deduction. Yep. What? Minus 10. Why am I always on the losing side of the battle? Braggadocio. When do I get to choose the Secular or Solomon. The people curse him who holds back grain, but a blessing is on the head of him who sells it. The people curse him who holds back grain, but a blessing is on the head of him who sells it. Secular or Solomon Crystal? Secular China. Secular China. Grain thieves in China. Moova, you're up. Solomon Proverbs 11. Proverbs 11. Moova's in. Mike? Man, I I was thought it was definitely Proverbs, but that China thing got me thinking.

I'm gonna say secular no. No. No. I'm gonna go Solomon Proverbs 15. Solomon Proverbs 15, the people curse him who holds back grain, but a blessing is on the head of him who sells it. It is indeed Solomon Proverbs 11. Yeah. Hoover regains his 10 points. Guess what's up? No. That's another negative 10. I don't want your ego getting out of hand. That's fair. Yeah. No. That's that's fair. You're putting me in right seat. Put me in right seat. Kesto, I can't really deduct your points, but I can put us a frowny face Yeah. Sweet. By your name. And I'm gonna get a point because I'm administering the points. And you've you've offended every greedy Chinese grain dealer that listens to the program.

Thanks a lot. All three of them. I'm in trouble. Secular or Solomon, if you are ugly, learn how to dance. If you are ugly, learn how to dance. Secular or Solomon Buva? Secular, my father. Sean? Sean?

I'm gonna go I'm gonna go secular Italy. That's offensive, Mike. Secular Solomon. Secular and Germany. Couldn't we both have gone with Italy just to keep the fence down? No. It's a question. Offend the same group of people. Just keep it there. Crystal for the trifecta. If you are ugly, learn how to dance. Hey. We both Secular or Solomon?

Secular for sure. But what country? Russia. You know, I'm just gonna go with The US. It it's it's safe to poke the bear internally. That's on yourself. Here's yours was worse though because you had time to think about it. Those two just spit it You're like, you know what? I really thought of this and it's definitely American. It sounds like something an American would say. I'm sorry. If you are ugly, learn how to dance. It is secular Zambia.

Zambia. That was my second answer. Exactly. It's very close geographically to Italy. Alright. I'm gonna give myself a point, but everyone else got nothing. You got a point for Germany? Yeah. There's no worse seat to be in than yours. See, if you were the point administrator or the guy that reads, you can't lose. Yeah. Fair enough. Secular or Solomon. If you find the residence of a place worshiping a donkey, bring the beast some grass. If you find the residence of a place worshiping a donkey, bring the beast some grass. Secular or Solomon

Mike. Secular Netherlands. Definitely. They got they got donkey deity problems in The Netherlands. Definitely do. Crystal joy. That is honestly exactly what was going to say. That's what I I've I Being agreeable to you 50 points. Absolutely. I'm a crooked Wait.

I so you're in with secular Netherlands? Mhmm. Come on. Yes. Stick with it. Yes. I'm sticking with it. Okay. Boo would try to Google it. 10. 10, know. 10. Point. Hey, man. I got a Snapchat. Leave me there. Do the Dutch worship dunkies. Yeah. I'm gonna I'm gonna go oh, man. I'm gonna go secular France. Interesting. Alright. If you find the residence of a place worshiping a donkey, bring the beast some grass. It is secular Morocco. Yeah.

France. By the way, this is bad advice. Just because the Moroccan say it doesn't mean it's a good idea. Dude, you see somebody worshiping something weird, you don't figure out what it eats and bring somebody. I mean, I get I get where it's coming from, but, that's that's not that's not wisdom. Secular Solomon, whoever puts up security for a stranger will surely suffer harm, but he who hates striking hands and pledges secure. Whoever puts up security for a stranger will surely suffer harm, but he who hates striking hands and pledge is secure. Secular or Solomon Crystal?

Solomon. She's in for Solomon. Buha. Solomon Proverbs seven. Proverbs seven, Mike. I don't have the faintest idea what that means, Ben. Why wouldn't you wanna keep security for a guy who's in the troubles? Wait. Read it again. Whoever puts up security for a stranger will surely suffer harm. You're taking a risk on a guy you don't know. But he but he who hates making pledges is secure. It's better to avoid making a pledge on somebody's behalf you don't know.

It's like it's like movie rounders, Mike. It ends up on the guy. What? It's on You vouched money. You vouched for the wrong guy. Now, it's on you. Oh, your securities. Like, cash money. Yeah. Not like a not like a fence. Not not yeah. That's what I thought. Yeah. Like, there's a wayward guy, and we're like, wait, I can't take you in. But my word is I my was really confused. I'm a put up a fence to keep you out. This is the problem of being an idiot. I don't understand half the stuff we're talking about. I'm gonna go with talking about Proverbs, you gotta say fool. I'm gonna go I'm gonna go with Proverbs and what what what chapter did you put out? Seven. Yeah. Six.

Yeah. It's it's Price Is Right rules. Good call, Mike. Whoever puts up security for a stranger will surely suffer harm, but he who hates striking hands and pledge is secure. It is indeed Solomon, Proverbs 11. Proverbs 11. 11 again. Someone should have caught on to my laziness and know I start picking all from the same Proverbs chapter. We don't have short on time. We don't short short on time. There's some securities in there. Somebody About sluggards. Here we go. Secular versus Solomon.

Catch the bear before you sell his skin. Catch the bear before you sell his skin. Secular or Solomon? Boova. Secular Canada. You're a one trick pony. Is your logical response to me being correct? Different answer. Mike.

I'm gonna go what do you say? The bear? Secular Russia? Alright. Secular Russia, Crystal, catch the bear before you sell his skin. Well, I'm gonna come up with something different. I was gonna say he's gonna dock you points if you agree with me. I know. I can't agree with you. Secular Who else has bears? That's what I'm thinking. I know. Who's heavy on bears? Are there bears in Nepal? Does Africa have bears? Absolutely. We're gonna go with Africa. That's a point. Congratulations.

It's a terrible answer. Didn't To do a song on that? I've seen the bears down here. I believe that was plains in Africa. Tricky. I thought it was rains in Africa. I think it's rains in Africa. I thought it was plains. Wow. I thought it was Danes. I thought it was a tree. All three would be creepy. Catch the bear before you sell his skin. It is secular

Vietnam. Yeah. What? Vietnam. You don't have bears in Vietnam, do they? Those what you know. Yeah. Look what your stereotypes have done. Yeah. I just play in Like Maybe I'm just thinking, like, all of Asia, there's no way there's bears People have to have existed in Are you saying people have to have bears to have a proverb about bears? I would hope that they do. I feel like Why would they feel like they're wise enough to say something about an animal they don't know about? Here's the thing. I feel like I would understand that you shouldn't sell a bearskin unless you've caught the beast. But why wouldn't the Whether I live in a bear country or otherwise. I agree with Ben. Yeah. That's a good point. Of course, you do. Ben, how many points deducted do you think Mova should have? I think 75. Wow. We were on a one point situation, and now we move to there's no way I'm winning. Man, your obstinacy knows no best. Secular or Solomon?

Let's see. Treasures gained by wickedness do no profit, but righteousness delivers from death. Treasures gained by wickedness do no profit, but righteousness delivers from death. Secular or Solomon Buva. Solomon. You started with Buva the last three times. This is Mike deal. No. I went in the last three. Go ahead, Buva. Hey. Solomon, Proverbs four. I'm the kingpin of Internet radio program. I will do what I want. Sorry. The mic's your daredevil. Proverbs four? Four. Yeah, Mike. It's got all the earmarks of Proverbs.

Proverbs 12. Crystal. Alright. I'm gonna go with Proverbs 22. She's in with Proverbs 22. Treasures gained by wickedness do not profit, but righteousness delivers from death. It heralds from king Solomon, Proverbs 10. Proverbs

I can't 10. Stuck in righteousness. Everybody gets a point. Hey, man. By the way, I was wrong. It is I bless the rains down in Africa. You were googling stuff. Put that down. Well, this time, yeah. Wanted to know if I was right about Africa. 37. Wow. You did gain a point for your correct Solomon answer. Hey. Cool. So Alright. Here we go. If you're playing along to the home game, this is the final this is the final question. Tally up your points. Be ready for, put all the bets on the line. Mike, hey. I'm gonna introduce betting you to the final round. Sure. Mike, how many you wanna put on? Let's see. I have a total of nine points. I'd like to bet them all. K. Mike's Mike's all in in Final Jeopardy. Booba. Booba. I think I got, like, negative something. You're a negative a 142. You're willing to borrow at least 50 from the bank. Yeah. 211. Okay. That's right on. Crystal? How many points do I have? You have four tallies and a frowny face. I was gonna say, how much is the frowny face? I'll bet I'll bet my frowny face. Yeah. Frowny face is actually worth double frownies. Does that automatically make it a smiley face if she wins? Yeah. Actually, if you put two frowny faces together, it looks like that cool

German m. Right? Because it's got the two dots above it. So that's gotta be worth big points. There you go. German. I'll take it. Yeah. Like the from the Maier grocery store or gas station. They got an m with two dots on it. Where is the Maier? Whatever. I can't deal with you. Here we go. Alright. Secular versus Solomon. This is for all the this is for all the all the rabbits. Anger without power is folly. Anger without power is folly. Watch him. Keep it on him. He says folly to try to trick you. He does say folly to try to trick you. Secular or Solomon honored guest, Crystal Joy.

The one I don't know. Yeah. Right. The one barber that I've done missing. I memorized all of them, but I knew this one was gonna come up someday. It sounds more secular to me. Oh, bold. Okay. Secular Oh, I gotta pick a con for it. Country option? I'm gonna go with Canada.

No bears. Because Canada. They angry Canadians. Anger without power is folly. Secular versus Solomon. Boo. Hold on. I'd like to take all nine of my points and bet against Crystal. Am I allowed to do that? Yeah. That's permitted. Go ahead. Is that betting against okay. Can you can you read it one more time for me? Anger without power is folly, don't you know?

You know? Nice. I'm I'm I'm gonna bet against the folly. I'm gonna say secular. Secular? And I'm gonna say North Korea. Yep. We're gonna see if we have any North Korean listeners today. I'd like to actually move by nine over against it. So North Korea move. I heard anger without power. That sounds like a North Korean thing to say. Anger. I

don't know how many know what? We just start a war right now. Go ahead. Anger without power Is Folly Secular Solomon. Solomon. Mike's in for Solomon. Oh. Straight up Solomon. You heard that folly? All chapters. Oh. Beginning verse of every chapter. If you're gonna be peeved, you might you better have the power to back it up. That's right. Solomon agrees. Alright. Here we go. Anger without power is folly. Secular Yes. German. Dang. Come on. Man. No one saw German coming? We already betted against the the axis of evil earlier.

We went through two world wars with this country. We can't pick out anger. But I know as a matter of fact that North Korea took that and said, yeah, we're gonna say that again. That doesn't count. Okay. A big deal. Vuba ended up 422 points in the hole. What? I feel like I got that last one right. Yeah. But, I mean, I yeah. I don't know. That was being generous. Wow. Alright. Well Crystal ended up with two smiley faces or two frowny faces Oh. Encapsulated by a box I drew around them. Hey, the German m. Are they happy now? No. They're still pretty No. Loves company. Okay. Let's put a beard on one of them or something. Straighten that up. And then I came out as a victor with nine points total. How did that happen? Yeah. The I feel like you really set yourself up for this one by being the point keeper. Here's what they don't tell you in school. How to win at life? You carried a pin. You carried a pin. You grabbed a path. That's how people win. Should've brought my clipboard in here. That's true. Shoot. That's a that's wisdom though. But, Mubi, you've worked in a corporate environment. No one wants to be the notetaker. But if you're the notetaker,

you you control the discussion later on because no one's gonna remember what happened except for you wrote down, Ben's idea was good. Yeah. Bill had mustard on his time, doofus. Mike brought pastries. Everyone loved them. Alright. If you wanna catch past clips of the show, you can go live from the path.org, including you wanna play the Secular versus Solomon home game, catch it from the past. We've done Secular versus Solomon with the likes of Foreverland, Kendrick Knudson.

Who's who's in here that was just in town recently? Acres? Acres. Yeah. Acres, I think, done some Secular Solomon. Yep. Oh, I'm sure he has. Yeah. And then Suicide ever done I don't know. I don't know. Righteous Vendetta. Righteous Vendetta. Yep. That's right. Yeah. We get we Lots of people. We'll see if we can get Tim Timmons in here Secular Solomon. Yes. Definitely. Okay. But anyway, I will post a crystal's clip of Secular Solomon, it may live in infamy as this day shall. And Secular North Korea. Then you can play play at the home game. There's some other games out there. You can play Things Heard on Christian Radio to raise money. Where I was $1,000 to the apostle level. Thousand dollars to the apostle level.

And, the end of the world as we know it, like, these are all the prognostications about how the world was gonna end, which where did they come from? Hey, Why you gotta use prognostications? Because I called you braggadocious, and I like to keep a high standard. Here's what I just realized, and I'm feeling slightly convicted about. I moved chairs so I wouldn't be able to see the answer and cheat. And then I just turned around and cheated anyway when I was keeping score. So that's Well, thanks for being honest about it. That's convicting. Mike, that's We had integrity in that game. Mike, that's 10 extra points for your honesty postgame. Thanks, bud. That's a total of 19 for me. The Lord shines. Hey, the the same sun that melts the wax hard to clean. What is this participation trophy kind of stuff going on Congratulations in this to Mike on this paper. I feel like I owe so much money for this deal. Alright. You're you're listening to Life From The Path. We're in studio with Crystal Joy. You go to crystaljoybooks.com. You can pick up her book, Completely Captivated,

and also read she's got other stuff out there. Crystal, are you a blogger? Do you blog? I do not. Have you considered blogging? No. Okay. Just don't feel like I'm a blogger right now. No. I think that's fine. I I I I, I'm a bad blogger. I blog once every two years. So, I mean, you best it's best to stay out of the game. That's the right move. Okay. Yeah. I I mean, doing the short stories was enough for now, so we'll just we'll just see what happens with that first, but maybe eventually. But just don't feel like I have time right now. I agree. You you agree she doesn't have time keep

up on blogs. Even people that I like, they write a blog, I'm like, yeah. I mean tried to read a blog once, and I was just like, man, Yeah. I'm a go to Facebook. Yeah. Can you sum it up in a meme? Yeah. Is there any way you can make this a 15 news clip that really doesn't mean anything to me? Can you have Batman slapping a guy and say it that way? Who's grumpy cat in this situation? Come on, man. Hey. Sad, really? Hey, that would That's true. That would be funny. Crystal, can you think of a meme that would that you would be willing to use to describe your book? Maybe put the thought on it. I wouldn't. I would I would have no idea. I had it in my mind, like, what how would I if I was a guy who was tasked with selling your book and was forced to use that Batman slapping a Robin meme to sell it, like, what would I put in the boxes? You would say, our love story is an interest. Quack. Yes. All love stories are interesting. Meme.

It doesn't have the title of the book in it, Mike. Alright. Okay. Anyway, I might put the thought on that. You see that in And then, like, a second word blurb that says, hey, by the way, you should check this book out. Yeah. Send it to me if you think of something. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I like it. I'm gonna I'm gonna I this is what I have time for. I can't I can't blog you for I'll make you a meme for your book. Yes. Yes. I will. I will ghost blog for your site. Right. Over the Perfect. Alright. You're listening to Live From The Path. Let's see. What what what time we got here? Moova? Yeah. What's up? I heard that someone mistook you for the pope this week. Man, it was awful. That's what I'm saying. It's like, how do you get people to go away if you're mistaken for the pope? Well, I I was given some wisdom once that the the best way to get people, off my lawn when I'm told that, that, people have going around to, the local watering hole saying, hey, that booba guy is the Pope. Booba's Pope. Oh, man. I've been told that I need to come up with some kind of, paper wisdom that, that has to do with my life. It has to be specific about me, but, will also mean something to them to to get them to go away. They call it a bull.

A a a paper bull. A paper bull. That's your yeah. Paper bull. No. No. It's not a joke. Is this supposed be a pun? No. No. Should have been in on this from the Gibeki. No. No. It's a legit thing. I never mind. Go ahead. Whatever. Propositional or whatever you said earlier. Braggadocias. So I so I've been in college now for a whole semester,

and, I feel like I am qualified now to speak on the on the situation, now that I've been there for three months. People keep coming up to me, as in young guy, but older than them is probably the best way to put it. I'm I'm I'm a safe bet for, for, 18, 19 year olds to talk to about, about life because they recognize that, I'm I'm young enough to kind of still be able to to to play ball with them, but I'm I'm

older than they are and a little bit, further along in my life, so I can I can try and talk to them? And I keep running into situations where people come up to me, and they've got something that's going on, whether it be, a boyfriend that's that's going bad or girlfriend that's going bad that they just they want to get out of this relationship because they don't feel like they're, they're they're worth anything in this or, you know, they're having troubles with their friends because their friends just aren't treating them right. And and they don't want to lose all their friends, so they're just kind of dealing with the fact that their friends are treating like crap. And then this kinda came to a head because, I I got a call at, you know, 03:00 in the morning, a couple, a couple of nights ago from a gal, that had just, got I'll spare most of the details, but she had she had just basically gone gone on a date with a guy. Guy. And the date ended poorly,

with this guy being just a general schmuck and and I'll save his, his deal with that. He's just being a schmuck and and did some stuff that I'm not proud to say that I'm in the same gender as the guy. But, and she she calls me up and wants to talk to me about this. And I start telling her, you know, I'm so sorry that this happened. I'm so sorry that, you were subjected to that kind of a situation like that he treated you so poorly.

And her response with was was the saddest thing I've heard in a very long time, which was, oh, I'm used to it. And I go, woah, woah, wait, what do mean? She goes, well, happens all the time. You know, I go on dates and then these guys just try and treat me a certain way, and it's just it it it you get used to it after a while. And I literally almost started crying to that. I'm like, you've got to be kidding me that that this gal who is a daughter of the living king of the universe that calls her loved and wanted, she has been belittled to the point where she thinks that that a guy treating her like a piece of meat and like she's worthless, she's used to it. And

there's a certain responsibility on the dude for being just a general jerk in the situation, but it also kind of comes back not in any way on fault of hers, but, she needs to realize her identity. And we kind of started talking about that. I said, know, who who are you? Who who who do you define yourself as? And she kind of wasn't able to give me an answer. And we started talking about, what Jesus calls her, which is is loved, which is her his daughter.

All these different things, and and, she's has the potential to be perfect through his sacrifice, and and and and he died on on the cross. He was murdered on the cross for her, and all this different stuff. And it killed me that that she had no clue that that was who she should call herself, is a daughter of Christ and and a daughter of the king.

And it just it got me thinking that this is a scenario where if someone had understood their identity, which we all don't, we're still trying to figure it out, but started to understand her identity, maybe she would have felt like she had the worth that she does to be able to possibly avoid the situation in the first place, but b, be able to stand up and and not say that she is used to it or deserves it in some way. And it kind of branched out to me thinking about how many situations where people are lacking the self esteem that they need to carry on, are lacking the self esteem and self respect they need to get out of a relationship

that's awful, get out of a friendship that's awful, or take a stand for themselves. How many situations could be fixed by truly understanding our identity as who we are, as Christ calls us? You know, it's impossible. Well, I shouldn't say possible. It's it's difficult to find yourself hurt by, by things like this and hurt by words, as much as we are when we truly understand who God calls us to be. And it kind of made me start thinking because, you know, I've been a big guy my whole life, and I've been made fun of in all kinds of situations. Like I've been I've been called Shamu. I've been called, you know, fatty, fatty, no, whatever. Just a lot of stuff. And people have been rude to me. People have rolled down their windows driving past me on the side of the road. Like, I've I've gotten some mean stuff. And I look back on that, and I honestly don't know if I'd still be standing today with any self respect and any self esteem,

and any self worth if I did not truly have somewhat of a grasp of of who God calls me to be and who I am based off of of who my king is. You know, I I'm a I'm a citizen of the kingdom of Christ. I'm a I'm a son of the living God. I'm an anointed son based off of what God calls me. I'm I'm all these different things that that Jesus claims that I am and God claims that I am based off of the love that he offers me. And that's that is so important, for me to to start understanding who I'm supposed to be. You know, I I'm not belittled by the world in a way that it really shuts me down because the fact that I understand who Christ calls me and who who who God calls me to be. And it just it hurt me. It it hurt my heart that

I know who her father is. And he looks at her with so much more worth and love in his eyes than she could ever even imagine. We don't even have the words for it. And she has been broken down to the point where she says something like, I'm used to it, or I don't deserve better, and it it it sickened me. It it really it hurt me. And I don't have a whole lot of advice to you other than take a step back and and if you're in a place where you,

have been treated this this poorly, or if you're in a place where your friends are treating poorly or you are treating yourself poorly, or you don't have the self esteem that you showed or don't have the self worth that you should, I want you to take a step back and really try and figure out who God calls you to be. And if you have no idea who that is, find someone who can help you. If you don't know, what Jesus looks at you as, I want you to find someone who can help you find out who you are and truly figure out your identity. I'm not talking about through a self help book. I'm talking about through through the most important eyes, which are gods.

That is going to put you on a path of worth. And I'm not saying it's the end all be all. It's not gonna fix all your problems, and it's not gonna make every single day the happiest day of your life. But it's certainly gonna set you on a path of joy that that sustained worth and that sustained

feeling that that that you deserve something better than you might be given right now. That's Pope's advice? That's my Pope's advice. I did a sermon on that, on identity, I think, like, I don't know, six months ago or so. And like one of the coolest outcomes of having studied for that was realizing

how all the various places where we get identity from anywhere that's not Jesus are ultimately untrustworthy sources, and we can easily recognize that, right? Like we can recognize that even with our own minds, the random things that pop into my head in a given day, I know personally disqualify me from giving an accurate evaluation of who I am. Like, I just I'm just untrue trustworthy. Like, I I don't, my emotions get the best of me sometimes. I worry about things I shouldn't. I'm not worried about things that I probably should be. Like, I'm just not a I'm just not a trustworthy character. And then I look at all, like, some of my friends, even the guys that I trust the most, and I think to myself, like, I know these fellas. I don't trust them to give me, like, my core identity. Like, they're and then moving beyond that circle, you got you got capricious people who just, like, treat you in whatever they way they want to find value in themselves. And either way, they're not a trustworthy party either to say to define me. And so then I think, well, who could who can be trusted?

Who can be trusted for me to get my identity from? And then we land on king Jesus And we find that we have a creator god who says, like, these are created in my image and likeness, his inherent value and worth. And then the way that Jesus describes his children, people in the kingdom. Right? And I think to myself, I would never be willing to call myself some of those things that Jesus does. And I think to myself, but he's the only trustworthy guy in the group. He's the only guy that knows anything about anything Right. And has has even the position to accurately evaluate not only who we are, how we were created, but who we're ultimately to be, generally through the power of the helper of the Holy Spirit. And I think to myself, well, yeah. Well, okay. That's the right move. And so then you spend your life trying to figure out, what does God think? If God's got the line on it and that's where the truth is at, why do I figure out what he thinks? And then if everyone else is just wrong, then I live in the right part and then figure out how to work that out with people who are missing it. You know what I'm saying? And so, like, that was kind of the cool part is is is sometimes even it lands back on us internally, and we're like, boy, what do I what do I think of myself? And, like, I'm just not trustworthy. I I can't be relied upon. I got I got down moments where I'm not thinking right, and I don't wanna be the guy who leads the charge that says this is who I am. But if I step back and say, whoever created this thing, whoever's driving this ship, and whoever defines the people in his kingdom says, this is who you are, this is how you're created to be, this is how I want you live, and I think myself, well, heck yeah. That I can get on board with. I need reminded of that on a daily basis, and then that core tends to stick around a lot better. And I recognize untrustworthy people, myself included, and say, no. No. I'm sorry. You don't, really hold a candle to what Jesus is, so I'm gonna go with Jesus today.

And so yeah. I I agree. And and that's that that has an outflow into a lot of different things that we end up in life. Right? A lot of different interactions that we have and it, if that becomes your, if that becomes your anchor, it's a lot harder to get, not not that those interactions think this is what you're hitting that move. It's not that those things that happen from time to time don't hurt. Right? Names still hurt. People treating you poorly still hurt, But they don't they don't drag you away with them. Right. Right? They don't become something of power that shouldn't have power in your life. Like, the last thing you wanna do this guy sounds like a like a raven joker and the last thing you wanna do is give a raven joker power over to define who you are. Right. But but the thing is is like the way that can happen is because if you don't have a good sense of your identity to begin with, you start accepting it from foul outside sources and that's and that's the problem. Right? But the more I know about Jesus, the more I know about who I am in Christ,

the more I recognize and say, I could take advice or I could take this identity from Jesus or from this joker and then it becomes no contest and that you're less likely it'll hurt but it doesn't otherwise it can bounce. It doesn't it doesn't have the same benefit. So alright. That's the advice. Solid, Booba. Yeah. Alright. Get off my lawn. Yeah. Hey. And and I suppose, here's the thing. If you listen to the show, and and he was talking, Booba was talking about you need to to to get with somebody, you know, you can always talk to us. Shoot us an email at info live from the path dot org. We own phones and computers and emails and We like to coffee with people? Yeah. I like Absolutely. If you're within, like, a 100 miles, I'll generally buy you some coffee. So if you need Five fire miles. We all believe it. Who was willing to fly?

Wait. You held back miles? I wasn't able to use them for it. Oh, I see. But I still have them. Okay. What if she's not the one? I didn't wanna burn all my miles. Hey, man. I might use this again. If it doesn't work out with her, the next gal is gonna like, well, do you need to go to Madagascar? Because I have flyer miles. I'd not tell them story, Bouba.

Yeah. Anyway, shoot us an email at [email protected] and anything that we can do, we will do to try to help with that. Alright, Mike. What you got? Dear, life from the path. I'm a 57 year old male who's been thrust back into the dating scene. I'm financially secure, in good health, and have a good career. I'm searching for someone near my age who has similar achievements in life, someone I can communicate with in and out of the bedroom. Simple request. Right? What? We went right for it. He's got he's got

got life to live. Party. He's 57. Yeah. He's yeah. He's not pulling any punches. Go ahead. What I'm realizing is that dating hasn't changed much over the years. If one of the parties isn't happy and decides to leave, someone gets hurt. I've been on both sides. I'm starting to fear expressing my feelings openly and honestly. And if it eventually does come to sex, it's creating performance anxiety. Jeez, dude. I understand this is all part of the dating ritual and called, quotes, baggage, but for me, it's preventing me from being honest, and I'm trying to avoid it. I see a female therapist who says I just haven't met the right person yet, and I agree. I have a female friend in a similar situation who has become so bitter she now avoids men completely. My male friends tell me to quit looking for a long term commitment and just date for fun. Neither of these options appeals to me. My age old question is, how does a person find a happy balance in this dating world? Hey, man. You're fishing for the wrong things. Yeah. It's it's it's just I feel like I'm talking to a teenage boy. You know what I'm saying? I don't I I don't I'm missing it. I don't quite understand what the is there a specific thing here? Or he he's just he's he's being open and honest, and it's offending people. Like, that's what it sounded like to So it's it's sound I I'm not exactly what brand of honesty he's using, but, like, hey. We have a great time in the bourgeois, but outside, I find you boring and stale. Or

the other way around, like he's like, I can't just say whatever I want because then people get offended. That's true of life. Right. Right? Like, God gave you a brain so you can put two thoughts together and not say something like, man, you look fat in those pants. Or I hate your new haircut. People go, wow. Did something happen? Looks okay. You know? I mean, something Something happened. I'm sorry. What? Your wife gets a haircut. She comes in the door. I and you say, wow. Did something happen? Alright. What happened, sweetheart? You see? Maybe. Maybe I'm not I I actually just go the direct honest route. So I've My And I'm putting that in your mouth. Sorry. What happened? Did we were short on cash this month to go to the college again?

Oh, man. Anyway, I was like, I'm actually Wait. So so this 57 year old guy, was there any backstory? Like, did he just recently get divorced? Was it was he recently widowed, or is he just No. Still trying after forty years? No. He's recently Trust sounds like divorced. Sure. Yeah. Maybe he need if he was recently divorced, maybe he needs to spend some time on his own. Yeah.

That's kinda what I was thinking. I mean, I think he really needs some time to self reflect and figure out what is really important no matter how old he is. He needs a lady friend to be honest with though. He To complete him. He can he can keep writing into people to be that that little Jesus. Yeah. Hey. I know a guy you could be honest with, king Jesus. Yeah. Try that out. Job did. See what Job did. Hang on. Like 38 chapters of why that went wrong. My my therapist, madam Alaphaz. Yeah. Okay. So alright. So so

here's the thing. It sound it's a balance it sounds like a balance problem for starters. Right? If, boudoir goes well, other parts of the relationship don't. Stop saying boudoir. Well, I'm sorry. That's what what do you want me to say? I don't know. The sex room? What do you want me to say? The room? Literally, the two choices are the sex room and boudoir? Didn't he just use the bedroom? He's an adult. Anyway, so so it sounds like he's having a problem balancing I I would agree with probably both suggestions from from Crystal and Mike is that the Lord Jesus undergirds these things, you don't end up with this type of problem. Because, like, if you're finding an imbalance in one of the like, first of all, one shouldn't be happening without the other. That's causing part of your problem.

And I would say, secondly, like, if you're you're you're settling, and I hate to this guy seems like he might be a borderline jerk to some of these people with how he's talking to them, so I hate I hate to encourage him in this way. But, like, you're settling if you're saying, I'm allowing a relationship to proceed when we, a, don't get along, but the sex room is good or the opposite. Right? So so I would say, get get your priorities straight. Make them make them good kingdom priorities because they they that tends to sort out. I here's the thing. I just I know people with Jesus relationships, and they don't have they don't have the same types of problems or they're not as deep. It's it's just it's just true. I'm not saying there aren't marriage problems. It's that's reality. But, like I think the difference is having God as a center in your relationship. It helps in the resolution. Huge difference when you put God first.

I completely agree. Like, they're they're just right. You you end up doing things for right reasons and keeping things in the right focus, and I it would help some of this go away. But I would say when they say you haven't found the right person, I think that's right. Stop wading farther in the waters than you should until that happens. Secular says holy cow. It's it's bloated. Secular says, quotes, dating means different things to different people. To your male buddies, as you have found out, it means a sexual free for all. For others, dating is a sifting process that lasts until they meet someone they're comfortable enough with to communicate honestly. In any successful relationship, communication is key. That's why it's important to be honest with the women you meet and for them to be the same way with you. That's how people get to know each other beyond the surface and it's how trust is built. Chemistry is important, but it has to be mutual. You will know it when you find it. Listen to what your therapist is saying because she's steering you in the right direction.

Yeah. Well, that's cool. Yeah. I mean, you didn't really say anything there. I mean That was all of it? That was the full bloated? Yeah. That was it. Yeah. Know. That's I didn't really say much. Alright. Do one more. Okay. Hang on. It's it's loading it up. Tough to do another intermission. Yeah. Go ahead, boo. Okay. Here we go. Ready? Man. Dear life from the past. That works. Perfect. I'm 57. Wait. Wait. Same guy? Shush. Okay. Sorry. I'm 57, and I have been married for twenty five years. Wham o. Oh, man.

My husband has retired and is ready for me to do the same. I enjoy my work, and I am delaying my retirement because he wants to move to another state. Life from the Path, all I can think about is how I will be forced to start all over with a new church, new doctors, new friends, etcetera. That's incredibly stressful for me, and I don't wanna do it. It takes me a while to warm up to people, and I don't do it easily. To me, it would not be an exciting adventure. I've told him I don't wanna do this and why. He responds that if I want to visit my friends, I can always hop on a plane. He said he's tired of the cold and wants to move. All I could think about is having to sell our home, buy another one, learn a new area, make friends, find a new church. I have all of that here. Maybe he should be a snowbird. Woah. I think it sounds like they need to do some praying together. Because it sounds like a lot of me, me, me on both sides, and I think they need to come probably to some sort of compromise, but they just need to spend some time praying and asking God where they should go because it sounds like he has a plan, she has a plan,

and both of those could be good for them. But it doesn't sound like they're spending a whole lot of time praying to figure out what God wants them to do together. And it could be one plan over the other, or it could be something totally different and probably even better if they would spend some time trying to figure it out together versus just me, me, me, and arguing about it. So that would be my advice to them. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, put some

put the prayer on it and, you know, actually discuss this type of thing. That's what I don't understand. Like, some of these questions where, I I would like to know what that conversation was. Like, did you have you actually talked about this? Right. Hey. Hey. I don't, I don't I don't particularly wanna move. Like, if he's still planning to move and you told your husband, hey. I don't wanna move. Like, that's weird. And how has twenty five years of marriage worked for you if, like, your communication is such as, like, you tell your husband you don't wanna move, and he goes, oh, that's fine. We'll just put you on a plane to come see your friends. And, like, that's the whole conversation. Yeah. That just doesn't seem that Or or or doesn't equal itself. Or she's not telling the whole story. Right? Like, gonna take a misrepresenting husband. Husband may may have been more gracious than what she's letting on. Again, problem with the other side.

Here's the thing. I like I I mean, granted, like, they need to come to a resolution here, but, like, he may be slightly overselling this this snowbird thing. Like, I I get it. The weather's irritating and blah blah blah. Most people spend most of their time inside anyway. You know I'm saying? Unless it's like a I mean, you could heat the place. You could cool the place. Mike's anti Florida case. Mike's Mike's answer to this whole situation is air conditioning. When you go down to Disney World, where do they It's either they air conditioned everything cold now. The only guys not sitting in the air conditioning are the gators, which you're looking at from behind the air conditioning glass. Everywhere that you go that for vacation or for fancy times is always conditioned air. So you're overselling you're overselling this like this is not completely possible in your home.

I think you just need to set up one room in your house that is humid and airy, and then you could go sit in there for while. You need to set up your own terrarium? Is that what you're saying right now? People are hard to replace. Lay out on the rock under the really hot heat. That no. That's true. I can get a beastly humidistat and and throw it in that room, and you can geriatric your way over there all you want. Here's the deal, George. We're not moving anywhere. You're just gonna have your own little hot room. We're gonna build you a hot room. Genius. Yes. That is a good dance. You don't like cold weather. Come on. Pray and build a hot room. Your marriage is saved. Don't see.

Okay. Yeah. Tommy, talk about it. Like, yeah. Put put the prayer on it and talk about the thing. I think I mean, here's here's the thing. Someone's gonna have to let go. Right. I mean, truth is that there's a compromise in here that is not going to be Like a hot room. Like a hot room. A hot room or I mean, I don't know. Like, moving I I mean, I get where she's coming from. Move a state north. You gotta leave your whole leave leave friends and stuff behind. We have to find a new church. You know what they should do? He should go on long term mission trips.

You know what I'm saying? She suggested that he he be a snowbird. That's right. Like, should be go to Africa. It's warm over there. He could go mission in Haiti. Sweetheart, there are children in the Dominican Republic that need you right now. Yeah. And I'm gonna stay where I'm my friends. That's John. What are the many hands for Haiti folk? Always need people. That's right. Tim Brand. Hey, Hey, man. It's certainly, like, productive. Time to on my way, friend. Yeah. Hot room and missions trips. Hot room and missions. This man's back to live in Boom. Idaho. Here we go. Kingdom living. Alright. Secular's answer. If you and your husband can afford two places, perhaps you should both be snowbirds. It couldn't hurt to rent a place for a few months to see what life would be like in a new community. That's what I recommend to readers who contemplate making a drastic change, such as relocation in their lives. If you do that, you might find that the, quote, natives are friendly, and the community is congenial. However, if that's not the case, it can help you to avoid making a costly mistake. Wait. That can help you from the costly mistake of buying a second home? Costly mistake. Yeah. It sounds costly to rent a second home. Let's get a second home so we can save some money. Maybe we live in a different world, me and gonna say, this is definitely not advice to the masses, secular. Yeah. I mean, I I talk about maybe renting a a mobile home. Yeah. Exactly. I can get a trailer. Yeah. Like one of the collapsible ones. Get a tent. Can only be pulled by Jeep for a day. Yeah. Bill, what when do you feel like you started to feel distance from your wife? Well, when we bought two houses and lived in them separately. Yeah.

I built myself a hot room. It just didn't work out the way I thought it was going to. You know that hot room's a great idea. I mean, that's a weird deal. That's a huge terrarium. It's like a it's like a You're like an iguana. Goes and hangs out on the rock. Can we just take a vote on it and be done? Who votes for hot room? It's a good idea. I'm sorry. I'd hold on. I'm in with it. Give Crystal time to put her in there. I was gonna say, Are are you waiting for this to be more dying. Unanimous? Are you waiting for this to be gonna say I'm gonna I'm gonna say Crystal voted yes. Who's against the hot room? Hey. You could Mike, you could vote on behalf of the of the priest over there. What? The priest He gets to be point scorer and gets to vote on behalf of the priest? Yeah. Yeah. Unfair. That's four to one. Hot room. Wow. Alright. Hot room's getting built. Alright. You've listening live from the past. Thanks for hanging out with us tonight. Big thanks to Crystal Joy for stopping in. Thank you so much, Crystal. Thank you so much for having me. It's been so much fun. You're very welcome. You can go to crystaljoybooks.com

and pick up Completely Captivated. Also, where all legit books are sold, including the Barnes and Noble on the you can it up on the Nook or on, Amazon. Keep an eye out, but you can follow her on, on Facebook and stuff. I'm sure there'll be updates on, when those other two books are coming. In the meantime, go peruse the website, follow-up on your favorite couples from captivated, and keep an eye out in case we wanna do Is This Love Again. Maybe Chris will be swinging back in. Mhmm. I believe we will we will be on, next week. It'll be a final show of the year. And, yeah, I don't know what's going on. Haven't thought that far ahead. So, we're gonna break with you. Go check out the website live from the pack path.org for past clips. Sign up for the podcast, and, we'll see you next week. In the meantime, be faithful in the means. God will take care of the ends. You'll be listening to Live From The Path.