Live from the Pathway Studios in Johnston proper. You are live from the path. The Pathway Studios here in Youngstown,

where I'm here. It's good be with you this evening. What are you doing? Don't do that. Don't shake your don't shake your stuff at me. I'm dancing. Trying to open the show. I'm dancing to that sweet opening music. I can't take that kind of stuff. Alright. It's unfortunate. On the show tonight. So last week, if you remember, we were talking about the what what was it? The New York Times '27 Traits of the Modern Man. Traits of the Modern Man. Right? And so we were trying to figure out then what is how does the modern the New York Times Modern Man look in comparison to the urban gentleman, The life in the path urban gentleman. He wouldn't look good. No. No. I no. It wasn't quite close. We're gonna try to hit up the rest of those

and see see if we well, maybe not the rest. I don't know. There's a lot of them on there. I was gonna say maybe a couple more. Now so at at the end of though, it sounds like this has been going around, and there's some legit folks who've been who've been watching or commenting on such a thing. Right? Did you say Andrew, did you say? Mike Rowe attacked this particular list? Mike Rowe, somebody from I don't know. There was, like, a Facebook thing, and someone was like, hey, Mike Rowe. Check this out. And Mike Rowe was all like, well, okay. But here's my list of 27 things that manly men do. Shoot. I feel like we can't compete with Mike Rowe. But then again, he's not accurate to define an urban gentleman. So No. So okay. He's wrong on the verbiage. Yeah. So we'll we'll see what happens there. Also,

we have to but we had some Pope style advice. So we'll see if that shakes out or not. I don't know if that's gonna but then we'll get some advice on Dear Life in the path, and we'll handle your phone calls and emails. And that's kind of a joke because there's no way to call in here, and nobody emails the show. Hey, man. They can call our numbers. We'd either call you on your personal line. Hey. And if we can, on the radio, listen to half the conversation. I'll put it on speaker. No. That's great. No. I am pretty. No. That's what yes. Thank you. Hey. I also noticed how great I look today. Alright. So let's let's see if we can get a pickup where we left off. We're talking about modern man only buys a certain type of soda. Modern man use the proper name for things. Modern man has a pen to tweet. Okay. Here we go. Number 12. Number 12. The modern man checks the status of his Irish spring bar before jumping in for a wash. Too small, it gets swapped out.

What's an Irish spring bar? What? It's a soap. It's soap. Okay. Well, I use the liquid stuff, so I don't know. Yeah. I don't remember the last time I used bar soap. No. I used body wash. Why? I Just As in years now, I've never once bought bar soap. Hold You use a loofah? Like a man loofah? I do. You shake your head. You also use a man loofah? Andrew Carson? No. No. No. You go at it straight like hand style. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Urban gentleman is not afraid to admit that he uses loofah. Hold on a second. Man's body wash, though, I feel like it tends to come in dark bottles because that's what man would buy, and then you can't really tell whether it's got stuff in it or not. No. Mine's a clear bottle. Okay. Do you buy ladies wash? No. I buy men's wash. Okay. I I gauge mine by weight. It's like it kinda felt about five pounds, and now it kinda feels like one pound, so I better go buy more.

Oh, man. I don't know. I I checked the I prefer bar soap. Really? Yeah. I prefer bar soap. Is there any reason you prefer bar soap, is that just what you've always used? No. The the, the man's body wash make him feel slimy. Really? Yeah. Are you are you washing it off after you use it? No. I don't even turn on the water. I just go for myself. That's probably the situation, Ben. You can't just grab the bar and slap it against your cheek and just start going at it. Oh, yeah. It's not how it works, man. Oh, shoot. Mm-mm. No. No. Yeah. I I don't know. I I think well, so if if you have to ask the broad question, is the is the modern is the urban gentleman cognitive

or cognizant about what is going on in his shower before he gets in? Yes. You so I actually Nope. I would say opposite. I don't check that stuff. I just I check it when I get in there after I'm in the shower, and I'm like, oh, darn. Know I know exactly how much I have of of the body washes and shampoo and stuff I use. Don't think that's an urban gentleman. I think that's weird. I think I think they're stand there. Here's the deal. Here's the statement. The urban gentleman can be comfortable with his bathroom decisions. That's the urban gentleman. Yeah. But, like, I mean It doesn't have to make one decision versus another to not be an urban gentleman. No. I I just think the urban gentleman just makes his decisions consciously. Yeah. But He knows what he's up and Andrew don't, apparently. Well I don't get in the shower. I'm saying is nothing wrong with decision

is I get in the shower, and then I know what's up there. Mine is I know what's up before I get in the shower. Neither is the urban gentleman. That makes the urban gentleman completely indistinct. Because it's to say, as long as he makes the decision, which everything is a decision, then he's an urban gentleman. That's stupid. I feel like I'm comfortable making that decision if it's about bathroom stuff. No. Because I'm not really worried about, like, the etiquette in the restroom having to do with what's actually making an urban gentleman. I think you overdo it. Alright. We're gonna we're gonna have to agree to disagree on that. Agree to disagree. Think you're not or anybody stands out in his wild blue yonder looking for see if how much stuff is in the bottle before he gets into the shower. I don't know. I don't know about that. Wild blue yonder. How big of a bathroom do you have? Oh, that was good. Mine is a mine is a small size. Sorry. That was my that was my innuendo for male nudity. Oh. Oh, man. That made it weird. You asked. Here we go. Number 13. The modern man listens to Wu Tang at least once a week.

The who? I don't know what to say to that. That's ridiculous. No. I don't think so. I don't think that's the urban gentleman doesn't have to listen. The urban gentleman doesn't listen to whatever he doesn't wanna listen to. You're right. Now he's not beholding the Wu Tang. I'll tell you Oh, you're willing to make certain that it's not that big of a a decision here. We don't have to make it distinct. No. Not saying he's not beholden to Wu Tang. That is distinct. What is the urban gentleman then? I don't know that he has to listen to a, a specific thing during the week. But he has to have specific bathroom things? Yeah. What you decide whether he's going in there or not. Double standards? No. No. No. No. There's one thing is are you held hostage by your music selection? The second was, do you creep into your own shower and meh away the bottle? Hey, man. I don't snidely whiplash my way into the restroom. Just sitting there twirling my mustache and going, man. How much body wash do I have? I would get in and whip nay nay myself all the way into the shower. Whip nay nay. Check the bottle. You have made yourself so culturally irrelevant by saying whip nay nay. There we go. No. I think the I think the urban gentleman is not beholden to Wu Tang. Fair enough. Alright. Modern man still jots down his grocery list on a piece of scratch paper. The market is no place for his face to be buried in the phone. Do you make a list for the store? No.

I used to. I just show up and go, hey. That sounds good. I'll have some of that. Yeah. That looks delicious and somewhat cost effective. I'll take it. Carson? I used to, but now I use that, like, the Hy Vee Isles online thing. Yeah. The the online delivery service. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, they have you, like, type in your little card number that they give you. Yeah. And it remembers your cart your purchases from week to week, and I basically, the exact same stuff every week. And so it's like, okay. Buy the same stuff. Pay the same money. You used to be like, I have the usual, Chuck, and they they bring it by. There's not enough wiggle room. I need a guy to strap on a selfie stick and then walk around and then say, hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Stop. Stop. Is that rigatoni? To your left. To your left. That looks good.

Grab a couple of those. Hey, man. I'm actually gonna offer that. Hold on. I'm gonna get a video a webcam, strap it to my forehead, then I'm gonna walk around peep the the the Hy Vee for people. And then they could tell me to stop whenever they want to. Yeah. That's a legitimately bad idea. Let's see. Butter watch. I've I've done both. I've done both. I tried to use my Evernote for a grocery list. The problem here's the problem with this. You can't cross things off easily.

Oh. Like, trying to digitally cross things off is a bit of a pain. And so I I like the satisfaction of having crossed up my list. It's like a physical stimuli dish. Yeah. I conquered that list item. That broccoli is done for I got those eggs. Those eggs have been gotten. Here's the deal. I I think I could agree to this to a certain extent. The urban gentleman here's maybe I'll I'll broaden it though. Urban gentleman is not a first to a good old pen and paper for doing fair. Things. As matter of fact, I was what I found was when I'm doing sermon prep, it it almost always is beneficial if I write stuff out before I go try and type an outline. So yeah. Alright. I can get on board with that. Number 15, the modern man has hardwood flooring. His children can detect his mood from the stamp of his Kenneth Cole Oxfords. Sure. Carson's in. It says no. Is it legit hardwood or, like, can you get a a faux laminate? I feel like if we're going that far, no way.

No faux laminate. I don't make this kind of I have faux laminate. I don't I'm not more of a modern man because of it. Urban gentleman? No. Not because of my laminate, but definitely because of my body wash. Oh, I I don't know about this. I don't think I don't think the modern man has hardwood floor. This that says the urban gentleman can't live anywhere that there is not hardwood floor. You're saying you can't get down on some good carpet? Yeah. I think that's overly exclusive.

I don't think that's necessary. Number 16, the modern man lies on the side of the bed closer to the door. If an intruder gets in, he will try to fight him off so that his wife has a chance to get away. Man, I like that. I do. I like to sit close to the door thing. I don't know why. That's just kinda how I I was raised was was that kinda Hold Hold on. It's the same concept as is, sitting on the when you're walking a lady down the street, you should be closer to the street. Oh, so, actually, I do that. But I I what what is the thought process on the bed? If someone breaks in, you're the closest person to the bed or to the door so you can take care of it. Like, what give me the situation when does that's gonna be helpful. So you're in a Motel six. Alright? Yes. And then There's you you took the lady on a vacation. Right? You decided to go out for the anniversary.

And, you sleep closest to the door. So if there's ever an intruder in the situation, you're closest to them, so they can't get to your wife without you knowing. And you are the one who protects the situation. Right. And he and the guy jumps in with some sort of weapon, and he actually overthrows both of us. And I think to myself, at least I knew before she did. At least I had the chance to save her first, and I was failed. I was between her and the intruder saving her from harm. Yeah. Alright. Be optimistic. First

off Well, so is I'm gonna get hit by the car too. No. No. It's it's ridiculous. There there's a there's a little bit of, man bigotry and that type of thing. I'm not trying to say I'm better than the lady, but, like, unless I'm dating, like, a nine foot tall Swedish woman named Olga, the the chances of one of us being able to overpower the intruder or the other, I think I got a chance. I mean, I hear what you're saying. I just don't know that those extra few itches on that side of bed. First of all, my guess is that your average dude is sleeping through a little bit more than your average woman. And so you might be the first guy in the way of somebody coming in the door, but you ain't gonna hear it. The woman's gonna have to wake you up. Not when you're constantly on the alert of your woman's safety, like the superhero of a boyfriend that I am. I sleep with one eye open just in case I sleep at all times thinking of my woman's safety. Just in case someone comes into my Motel six, of which I seem to be with my wife at. Some kinda weird situation. Hey. It was a vacation. Stop making it weird. Oh, no. You're right. That's excellent. Hey, sweetheart. I really booked a nice Motel six for us. Hey, man. It's the time we got away. I went extravagant in the trip not to stay. I'm right.

Urban gentlemen. We're staying for Jeep. Don't know about that. We're camping. Maybe I may maybe I'm just taking this personally because I do not sleep on this on the You are. Closest to the door. I I I'm willing to state that you are taking it personally. Yeah. You're wrong. Depends if the location gives me the willies. If I'm What? In my own house or whatever, I'm gonna I I hear you. That is not something the urban gentleman says. You're immediately at a disadvantage. Why? Yo. What what are you gonna do? Sit straight up in bed and start kung fu chopping? I would is gonna go on? Here's the deal. In in the way that I sleep, I guarantee if I get out of the bed first

and the dude sees me or the gal sees me out of the bed, they're no longer intruding. Here's the your physical presence aside, are you telling me you, like, whiz bang out of bed? You hear a noise, you're like, I can get ready for action? Actually, I've done this. Like, time one eye open Well, like, quick story. I bought I bought a new alarm clock last year. Okay? Okay. And I didn't I did not think to test it out before I put it on the first time. And so it's like an old style, like, dinner bell alarm clock. Right? And so this thing went off the first morning I ever had it. It scared the Willys out of me. I had no idea what I was expecting. I had no idea what to know it was, and I couldn't figure it out for about fifteen seconds. I would just I screamed out a bit. Like, I got jumped full tilt, four feet off the bed out, looked at my alarm clock, almost attacked it, and then realized it was just my new alarm clock and thought to myself, I really should have listened to that sound last night, so I knew what I was thinking of. Dude, that is pretty weird. I I always test an alarm clock out. Right? See what's I don't know why I just trusted it. Things are gonna be bad. Saw the clock was moving. I'm like, there's no way this is gonna fail me. And then it scared the willies out of me the next morning. Alright. Alright. Alright. Alright. Here we go. Does the modern man have a melon baller? What do you think?

What? Wait. Is that the how the article? Yeah. Okay. Does the well, there's more to it. Does the modern man have a melon baller? What do you think? How else would the cantaloupe, watermelon, and honeydew he serves be so uniformly shaped? No. Urban Gentleman does not have a melon baller. Now hold on a second. Now if you're gonna commit to producing something out of your fruit, why wouldn't you pick up a decent tool to give it the old, you know, heave o? Because I feel like I don't want melon in small little spheres.

If I'm gonna eat melon, I want, like, a slice of melon. I'm sorry, doctor Selfish. This isn't about you. What if someone comes to your place and wants a nice melon ball? I know me, they shouldn't expect a melon ball. I'm sorry. Sorry for expecting I I eat like a Neanderthal, and, no, I would Hey, man. There's nothing Neanderthal about slicing a melon and then handing someone a wedge and saying, here you go. Except for you end up with with a cantaloupe wedge on your face. Am I am I making just, like, melons or am I doing, like, fruit salad? Because if I'm doing fruit salad, I might consider getting a melon ball. I feel like the urban gentleman's open to both. Here's the thing. Fine. Here's the thing. As an urban gentleman, if you're gonna get yourself involved in cooking something, you need to do it correctly. You don't phone it in and be like, I'm a dude, so I do it like this. It cook something something well. Put some style in. Hey, man. Stock a big deal. Melon ball that stuff. That's truth. Alright. I'll I'll deal with that. Alright. Urban gentleman does have a here's the deal. Urban gentleman has a melon baller if he has a u if he uses it on a normal, basis. I don't have a I I don't have cantaloupe, so I don't have a reason to have a melon baller. But if I did, I would pick one up. It's not a season anyway. Stop trying trying to play yourself off as as better for everybody. I'm the only gentleman. Number number 18. The modern man has thought seriously about buying a shoehorn. False. Here's the deal. I don't even know what a shoehorn does. No.

No. I I figured they just they sent that to you when your Social Security kicked in. That may or may have not have been me asking them, you guys, what a shoe horn does. Attached to your shoes, if you get mad at somebody No. Yeah. It's shoe on. I thought it was so I don't know. I thought I was gonna say, I thought the shoe horn helps it so that your shoes don't, like, collapse. Oh, to keep their shape? Yeah. Like, you put a shoe horn in the shoe for a while. I don't own any shoes that would require such a thing. Okay. Well, then you're not the urban jama. Not really that. No. I Wait. Oh, no. I wanna know. What is shoe Have you have you thought about buying a shoe horn? No. Where I've never even seen one for sale. I've I have no idea where to go buy one. I'm guessing a shoe store, but I've never seen them. Here's my here's my guess. It's all shoe horns were created in 1912. And the same shoe horns have been By the same cobbler. For, like, an a hundred and three years. That would make them collect these items, and therefore, there should be a shoe horn collector. But they're not collectors items because nobody wants them. That's why there's enough to satisfy the population Oh, that even though they were all made a hundred years ago. The shoe horn collector will have no competition, and therefore, they will be cheap. And they'd say, like, check out my shoehorn. Same reason that there's no, that you may say, hey. There's a guy that collects dead skunks, and it doesn't mean that there's price in it just because he's doing it because no one wants it. It's not popular because there's no demand. You can be like, hey, Iowa. I have the world's largest shoehorn collection, and we should make my house a national treasure. Hey, man.

The sixth thing on Google when you say what does a shoe is what does a shoe horn do. Sweet. So people really wanna know. Oh, okay. Rile it up. Apparently, you are correct. A shoe horn is how you don a loafer. Don a pair of loafers. You How you get your shoe into the Yeah. You well, no. That's how you put your, like, you put your foot on on the shoe horn with your heel up, and then helps to guide your foot and your shoe. That's what I'm saying. And then you take the shoe horn out. And, apparently, it's to help you from collapsing the heels of your shoes. I need one of those. Because some people will because some people will slip them on, and then their heel will actually crush in the heel of the shoe where it no longer has structural integrity. So Hey, man. I have that problem all the time. I need shoe horns. So maybe you do need a shoe Alright. Apparently, this this urban gentleman needs to go look at some shoehorns. I would say I've never contemplated it. Never once. I'm thinking about it now. Go try one out. I'm I will. Can you see if you can find one? I'll I'll see if I can do one. I'll do a review on one if I get get my hair pair. Hands up pair them. Alright.

Number 19, the modern man buys fresh flowers more to surprise his wife than to say he is sorry. Yes. Absolutely. Or buys her something she want or or she would care about. Doesn't necessarily Yeah. Yeah. Definitely element of surprise. I agree with that. Yeah. I agree. Something she want. German gentleman buys stuff not because he's trying not as a evidence of repentance,

but just because he's out doing the right thing. Right. It I was thinking of you, lady. That's that's all it is. I was thinking of you, and that's it. Yeah. Doesn't have to be flowers. Just something she cares about. Yeah. Okay. Mike, when's the last time you bought a you bought a gift, like a small little something for your lady friend? Does the anniversary count? No. Just because. Sometimes I'll pick up beverages on the way home. Does she does that make her know you care about her? Yeah. It does. That is. That is is. If I show up with a, 44 ounce Diet Coke, I was thinking about you on a drive home. That's the urban gentleman. Yep. If a lady likes loves a Diet Coke, he picks up a Diet Coke. Hold on. Does it count if I say, babe, I was thinking about you so I did not buy Reese's peanut butter cups for myself? No. No. Why not? Because that's still not a tangible thing for her to have. No. That is selfish. Almost. There's less of me to love. Sweet. What's what's your dad? Sweetheart,

love you, so therefore, I kept my diet. It's more like a a reverse threat. It's to say, yeah. Yeah. I I was gonna eat this thing, but I thought of you and I thought, no. I love you, and you'll be angry. So I will not eat this. No. That is not the modern That's the urban gentleman. Urban gentleman does a positive thing. Yeah. If urban gentleman buys something or picks up something nicer, stops the side of the road and grabs her flowers, whatever would make her feel special, just in an attempt to make her feel special. That's it. That's all it is. Alright. I think that's viable. Hey. If you guys ever Mike, you ever looked for a shoe horn? You ever consider buying a shoe horn? Hey. Do you know what a shoe horn does? Yeah. What does it do? It keeps the shape of your shoe. No. See, that's what I thought too. No. A shoehorn is something you put in the back of your shoe so that you can slide your heel in. Yeah. Yeah. I said what to that too. Apparently, that's the shoehorn? I I have used a shoehorn before, but, no, I do not own one. Wait. No. Wait. So having a having used one Yes. Do you feel like the urban gentleman should consider buying one? No. Okay. There's no need You for need a a robot hand to help you get your own shoes on. It helps with I need to help an apparatus. A hard leather, dress shoe so that you can slide your heel in. Without See that's this is thing that I give the I give the ladies junk for. It's like, why would you buy something that is,

that is uncomfortable? You know what I'm saying? Like, why would I buy a hard leather shoe that's hard to get on? There's only Seems like a waste of money. There's only one reason why people ever dress in a way that's uncomfortable, and it's because they think it makes them look good. Done it. Or it's because that's their burger uniform, one or the other. You know? No. It's true. Yeah. Enough. Mhmm. Okay.

Alright. Let's see. The modern what? We're number 20. The modern man is the little spoon. What? Oh. Is not feasibly possible. Some nights when he is feeling down and vulnerable, he needs an emotional and physical shield.

What? Okay. I mean, there's a way to do that besides offering to be shorter than you actually are. Like, tangibly, most of the time, the dude is taller big spoon ruins. Yeah. Yeah. No. That's weird. The urban gentleman doesn't discuss this. There we go. Yes. That's

the best one yet. The urban gentleman says, hey, man. You have no reason to know which spoon I am. Yeah. Yeah. Alright. Here we go. The modern man doesn't scold his daughter when she sneezes while eating an apple donut, even if the pizzas fly everywhere. That is oddly specific. That's very specific. Here's deal. I would say this is not just a matter of modern man urban gentleman. What kind of ape yells at his daughter for taking a sneeze How at dare you sneeze during that donut? That's ridiculous.

Yeah. I don't understand this. I've I you know, well, I mean, I now here's the deal. As I suppose that I've seen parents be like, cover your mouth. Yeah. Frankly, I like to sneeze in the inside of my shirt. That way, don't get my hand all dirty. That's gross. I like that. Mike, that is gross. Ben? That is not something the urban gentler put my hand up there. I just freewheel it out into the atmosphere.

Hey. Here's the deal. It's like peeing in a pool. It'll it'll there'll be so much, other atmosphere around. You're even gonna notice the difference. Oh, man. What? Hang on. This is Andrew, I don't feel right about this one. Andrew, you work in food service. When are you allowed to sneeze? What are you allowed to do? Well, I usually turn away from my station Thank you. Sneeze into my elbow and then go change my gloves. So into the elbow. Okay. Into my elbow. Do you have an elbow glove? Well, no. But just Your your elbow is filthy. You're nasty, man. Sure. Hey, man. At least it's not the inside of the shirt. Why? No one ever touches in there. Yeah. That's a weird way. Like, I feel like I'd feel weird about going,

Like like, that's like, those of you watching the podcast right now, like, that's a weird I do that all the time. And people are are generally confused by you. Here's the deal. Because then you go, no. I don't get your skin. If someone is going to be, at the downfall of my sneeze, it is responsible for me to take it upon myself. No one should be have to suffer my my fluids flying throughout the neighborhood. Yeah. But I feel like the whole, like, shove off,

bury in the elbow is the right way to do it. Then it's still on the outside of your shirt. You might accidentally rub it on somebody later. I agree. I've got I've taken this thing out of my hands. So so we've got sneeze into the world Yeah. And we've got sneeze into my chest. Like, that's Sometimes it gets caught in my chest hairs. That's what I'm saying. That's disgusting. Alright. That's the grossest thing I've heard today. Obviously sneezes out too. Unless it's potato chips. German gentleman carries a handkerchief. Here we go. The modern man still ambles half sorry. We're going through the twenty seven twenty seven characters to the modern man for the New York Times. See if we agree. We are in '22. The

modern man still ambles in the great blue yonder down his driveway each morning to scoop up a crisp newspaper. What? What? The water man still ambles half nude down his driveway each morning to scoop up a crisp newspaper. No. You're Man, there's no situation where he should be half nude walking around. I think he's trying to say he still reads the reads the paper. That Is what he's trying to say? Or give it delivered to house? Like it's the action. Yeah. He he's half nude. He's strolling down into the world because a man needs his reading material. Okay. Print media is dead. Dead. That's all I've got to say about that. Are the funnies only an option? Like, just can I just read the comics and then throw the paper away? Think newspapers could make, more money if they if you could order a subscription style like a TV? Like, look. Just bring me the sports section and the funnies. I don't want that other stuff. Save a lot. You can keep the business section. I don't want it. People get if you gave people the just even the illusion of choice, you're getting less paper for the same money. Yeah. You just don't have to rifle through the business section, which you hate and the realtor ads. I guarantee people will pay for that convenience. Yep. People would definitely pay for that convenience. The irony is that I think the companies would actually have a harder time doing that just because of all the sorting involved and the people that would have to separate those things out. But they but they were literally selling it for the same price so they could just take the sections out and recycle

what was left. Yeah. They still I mean, they still have to write the stuff. Like, you probably haven't made things a little easier on them. You made it harder. Yeah. Yeah. They save on paper, but they still have to pay for the, the either the technology, the machines, or the people that have to sort that stuff out. Feel like email really sorts this thing out, and the Internet is is one, this particular item. So, no, I would say the urban gentleman is not necessary that he ambles half Rodan style down his driveway Half Rodan. Over newspaper. That don't sound right to me. The half Rodan. '23. The modern man has all of Michael Mann's films on Blu ray or whatever the highest quality thing is at the time. I'm not certain who that is. I am I am also uncertain, Ben. Michael Mann? Man? Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. Who's Michael Mann? Name a Michael Mann film. I can't name Michael Mann. Do I is it two n's or I put the Google one in? Yeah. It's two n's. See what Google has to say because Google already answered one of our questions. Oh, Google straightened out that shoe horn. Yeah. We were all kinda confused about the shoe horn situation. Ben got it straightened out before we knew it, though. I know a shoe horn. Hold on, Michael. I'm gonna go buy one. Did he do Sherlock

with, Robert Downey junior? K. He did a he did a film recently called Black Hat in 2015, and then Heat,

Public Enemies, collateral, the insider, Miami Vice, Manhunter. So he's a so he's a director? Yeah. No. I don't think that's the case. I've never heard of any of these films. Yeah. The insider was the one with Russell Crowe when he was the, breaking down Miami Vice was Yeah.

Wigand. Was pretty good. Colin for Colin Farrell and Jamie Fox. He also did last of the Mohicans. Okay. Yeah. That Oh, yeah. The Aviator Mhmm. Ali Leo DiCaprio. Hancock. K. He's done some stuff. Yeah. Fair enough. I don't think I think the I don't think the urban gentleman needs to have owned all of them on blue day. Uh-huh. He also did a film in 2003 entitled Bad Profanity

with, like, five s's. Oh. So that seems like a rough job. Yeah. Maybe not Michael Mann, but there's no reason that someone can't have, like, a collection of whatever they enjoy. Yeah. And, like, I I just recently finished the, what is it, the Jurassic Park thing. I bought the Jurassic World. Was I like, it's complete again. So modern man or the excuse me. The urban gentleman is willing to take a liking to something. Sure.

Doesn't necessarily have to stick to some cultural norm. I could throw that out of the pop fictional. Lord of the Rings, trilogy. Yeah. Me too. Are are they just picking my Michael Mann because he's a little bit action but a little bit of culture? Is that what's going on? I think yeah. Is it to apply something about who the modern man is? Okay. Okay. So Urban Gentleman watches Lord of the Rings. Yeah. Awesome. We're in. Hey, Urban Gentleman. They're it will stream things. I mean, I feel like I'd be foolish to purchase a hard copy. Yeah. I gotta have the hard copy. Why? It's not in my hands. It's not worth it. Why? Because then I can be like, hey. Check out my shelf. There? Check out my shelf. Check out my shelf. It's got the full art cover thing of the the guy. Ma'am? No. I'm not on my Mhmm.

Get a poster. But I can't watch a poster. No. You you watch You should look at everyone. Movie with the poster at the same time. People know that you enjoy that thing. Meh. Alright. Here we go. Number 24. Oh, hey, man. We're let's let's go. How many are there, Ben? 27. 27. Okay. I'm ready. Go ahead. 24. The modern man doesn't get hung up on his phone's battery percentage. If it needs to run flat, so be it. Oh.

Yes. But he's also prepared to charge it if he needs to. What? That sounds like not a modern man that would say something like that. No. He's he's conscious of the fact that sometimes people need to get ahold of him. And therefore, if it does, he's got a way to charge. And and Buuma's version of the urban gentleman, he feels very, very self righteous and important and assumes people are trying to get ahold of him. And so he has to charge I didn't say I assumed that that was the situation. I just like to be available just to get somebody to help me. Here's the deal. I will rephrase this. The modern man does not drain his battery percentage playing,

playing, World of Warcraft. Angry Birds. And Angry Birds. Used to leave your phone charged up ready for calls. If if you look at your here's the deal. If you look at your phone at the end of a month and you have more text messages than phone minutes, you, sir, are not the urban gentleman. You talk. You have conversations with people. You also gotta watch your data usage on, say, doing stupid stuff like playing games on the Internet. I'm not against the casual game here and there, but I feel like if you're gonna do some meaningful stuff in life, you do it with people and not, not playing games. Hold on a second. Why why, what what's the problem with the text message? No. I feel like that's not personal. Why? What Now hold on. Unless your text messages are mostly to your wife, I think that's fine. Hold on a second. How is that different than writing a letter? What do you mean? That's like saying letters are impersonal. Yeah. I agree. What? Before the telephone was dead, people never knew anybody. They knew people better who they talk to. John and Abigail. Otherwise, they'd have just talked to them instead instead of Forget pen pals in the nineties. Yeah. People who don't use parchment and quill, they're just phoning it in.

I agree with Dave. Stop using technology. Finally, someone who sees the lights. Don't think so, James, brother of Jesus. You'll call me or I won't listen to this. Hey. He spoke the good news from the rooftops and wrote it down. He did both things. He didn't use the phone? That's right. He didn't use the phone. Like I said. You said use the phone You said use the phone. Well, the phone is now available. James would certainly use the phone nowadays. You think he would call everyone in the churches? No. He'd visit. See? He would drive over. He'd he'd have it face to face. I here's the deal. Like, I really dig on that. I'm not much for the phone. I would I would much rather go meet somebody and and be where they're physically at. Mhmm.

Then why were you defending the text message? Because I I also like the text message. It's the phone that I Hold on. You cannot define the urban gentleman by what Ben does. Yeah. I can't That's kinda what all of us have been doing since their Here's what I do. This is obviously the urban gentleman. No. He's Evan Air. Yeah. He sneezes out in the open, Ben. Here's here's here's what I like. I I think Mike's answer is the right one, though. If if the urban gentleman is concerned that people need to get a hold of him, he doesn't jack his minutes by or his phone usage

battery use time by doing stupid things with it. Agreed. So so you don't need to charge again. You just approve them with your phone usage so that if people wanna get a hold of you, they can. Polot, does the urban gentleman keep pictures of himself on his own phone? No. Well Yeah. Not hidden for if he's taking a picture No. Just by himself. What if the urban gentleman is dating and sometimes likes to have a good picture in case someone asks? Like, hey. It's nice to meet you. Can I see a picture of you on your phone? No. Say More along the lines of I'm right here live, babe. More

along the lines of, hey. You should send me a picture so I could see you. No. No. That's not urban gentleman living. And I go, alright. Let me, let me peruse the archives. Urban gentleman has no selfie. No. No. That's not true. You know, here's the deal. We're gentlemen, we are talking about the urban gentleman. No. Not the gentleman that you guys want to be. No. I no. I agree. The urban gentleman does not have options on his phone. No. Let me look through and get you the best one. The urban gentleman knows how to take a true selfie. No. No. Yes. Urban gentleman could take a classy selfie No. Without being a fucker to impress a lady, you send your you send yourself you send her a picture of yourself and a little kid that you hang out with. I have that. Yeah. Send him that picture. Like I do. Here's me and a kid, or here's me and, somebody else of us having a good time. Not just me, myself with one eyebrow raised. Be like, hello. Hey, man. You don't make it seem like you know what's up. Alright? You have a picture of yourself in that suit on your phone?

I sent it to my brother. Yes. Because he wanted to see it. Yep. I didn't take it so that it was like, hey, everybody. That's not what I asked. I said, do you have a picture of yourself in that suit on your phone? Yes. You are not the urban gentleman? I'm the urban gentleman. I would agree. You are the urban The urban gentleman takes pictures with kids. Yeah. Absolutely. Even if it's unknown kids, it's better than selfie ever. What if I have a picture of me in the suit with a kid? That's fine. Then you're alone. Yeah. That's solid. Yeah. That's a cute picture. I agree. Urban gentleman does not have options of himself on the phone. No. Man, what if what if I need to determine the the feeling of the situation? You do not. Like, hey, man. Is this, that kind of selfie situation? No. There's not no. There are not multiple modes of it. No. Yeah. What if you're taking a picture with a pet? Is that alright? I did that once, and if you own a pet, which What if you what if you take a picture with a friend's pet because it's a pug and it's ugly, it's crazy. And you have to prove how ugly this freaking pug is. Then take a picture of the dog, not you and the dog. Yeah. Why does your face have to be Because you have to have some point of reference. Here's

a good looking pug. Me. And an ugly pug. Hey. Actual pug. Look at this good looking dog, and look at that gross pug. That is exactly how that photo went. Pictures of yourself do you think have him on the phone right blatantly honest with ourselves. It's probably a couple 100. I'm not gonna to you. Have a couple 100 pictures of yourself on Not your just like me going mhmm. Mhmm. Like, in situations, like, I have a picture of me on a plane with a dude behind me because it was funny. And then I have I have a picture of me at a waterfall, and I have a picture of That's riveting. Well, like, because the fact that I just walked down a mountain to it, I was pretty excited. I thought to myself, hey. I'd like to see this again. Snap. Like, that's the exact situation I picture of the waterfall, but not me standing No one breathing heavy. Gentlemen, let's be let's be blatantly honest ourselves. If I said to you guys, hey, man. I walked down a mountain to a waterfall. People are gonna say,

no. You did. But you were there to take the picture. Anybody can take a picture. I could have you upset him. Gentleman is that untrustworthy that I can't take you at your word. The urban gentleman is just a four hundred pound dude that probably wouldn't be seen walking down a mountain. I just No. No. Selfie? No. Alright. Question. Selfies. Classy selfies, urban gentleman. Of those 100 or so pictures you've got of yourself, any duck faces? Absolutely not. No. Okay. No, I don't stoop to that level. At least I've got a little respect. Yes. And I'm willing to say that. I will not stoop to duck face. However, I will take a picture of me at a waterfall.

All right. What's the next one? I'm sorry. Moving on. Yeah. Moving on. We've established the urban gentleman takes a good picture of himself. Keep going. He does not do that. He can Just because you buffoons don't know how to take a good picture of yourself does not mean that I should not selfie. Here's the deal. The modern man can take selfies of himself. The urban gentleman, however, does not. Urban gentleman knows how to do this. Here we go. '25, the modern man has no use for a gun. He doesn't own one, and he never will.

No. Urban gentleman can have a gun. I agree. The urban gentleman will certainly have a gun. Yeah. Urban gentleman says, hey. I want a gun. I'm gonna have a gun. Or I don't want a gun. I won't have a gun. I don't know if that's a requirement, but, I mean, I got coyotes at my place. Urban gentleman shoots coyotes. Yeah. I mean, here's Urban gentleman's comfortable enough to make decisions. I I think the modern man is presenting a situation in which he's never he's never at odds with the elements, and which would tell me that he's not a he's not an urban gentleman. Right. An urban gentleman who knows no interaction with the elements of which the concept of a gun at least passes his mind. I'm not saying that that's necessarily the right answer. Yeah. You don't have go mountain man. Has he not been in a situation where you're like, you know, I get why people have weapons. I wanna pass on it, but I can certainly understand it. Hey, man. Look. I understand if you're not a big fan of weapons or whatever, but I mean, I mean, something here's the deal. If a coyote is trying to break into your place, or let's change out coyote for another person Yeah. Weapon. Like, I don't know that I would mind flashing iron. Look. You could take a gamble. Maybe I shoot this thing. Maybe I don't. But it's in my hands. Your call, Buffalo. Yeah. Make your move. Yeah. Spin the wheel, Padre. Hey, man. Seriously, I want a machete for that reason. Yeah. Yeah. I Like, legit. Like, I want someone to break into my house and then me walk out of my my bedroom with a machete. Yep. Skin that smoke wave. That person is never coming back in my house. Yeah. That's where I feel like being in the Rodan would benefit. It's that if you came out with a machete. Right. You don't That is exactly without saying it, that is exactly what I'm saying. And the great blue yonder Yeah. With a machete.

Oh, man. Yeah. That person does not come back in that house. A grown boova completely in the buff with a machete in his hand? Like, wrong house, bro. No. I wouldn't even say that and be like, wants a breakfast? That's creepier. You know what we're having? You. Regular dude says, hey, man. You should leave. Creepy booba goes, come on in.

Party's just about to start. Yeah. I just bought a melon ball. Yeah. Exactly. If you can answer me this, what's a shoehorn do? We're gonna have a real conversation. Yeah. Here's the deal. Urban gentleman doesn't have it's not it's it's not a definite you have to have the weapon, but I don't I don't begrudge anyone from having one. Yeah. I get it. It's all a move. Urban gentleman makes a choice. 26. The modern man cries.

He cries often. What? Here's the deal. I'm willing to take the first part. The first sentence. Shit. That interaction right there was the greatest part of the show.

He cries often. What? Did you say fries? I mean Did you did you say fries often? That sounds great. I was willing to swallow the first part of me. Dude gotta break down every once in while. An old hymn comes on. You can't take yourself. That's fine. You know, the kids are in bad shape. I understand. Often seems like it's promising a bit much. Yeah. I've been I mean, like, you really got a plan to do it often? I wouldn't categorize it as often. It's Tuesday. Cry time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would agree. Urban urban gentleman cries because it's appropriate. He doesn't cry often or on a schedule or whatever to make sure people know that he's a man. Yeah. I mean, I feel like I get caught doing some blessed assurance or something by myself in the car. I might tear a bit. Depends on who's singing it. Gaither's probably not. Alan Jackson, maybe. Yeah.

Okay. Urban gentleman understands the reason for crying, but doesn't necessarily have to do it. Yeah. I mean, got big stuff going on. I'd say burst some tears out. You don't hold it in like some kinda Sturdy oak. The metaphor I was gonna use is not appropriate. You don't hold it in. Glad you stopped it. Glad you stopped that situation in mic. But but I guess what I'm saying is is, like, if you're crying for some kind of effect or to be with the crowd, you're you're a liar, first of all. And second of all, I don't know where you're going in tears from. Yeah. Right. Right. Just live your life. Right? Like, if if whatever's going on, produces a a tear in you, let's have at it. I mean, if you If you wanna go fall, do that. If you saw a squirrel get run over and you feel like you're gonna cry, then I'd stick your face in your shirt for a while till it passes. Gonna have a sneeze if you think that's going on. Yeah. You better stop that sneeze from coming. I mean, you can go in a men's room or something till you get yourself composed. But, I mean, if you got heavy stuff going on in your life, I'd say square down a few. Why not? You think about weightlifting and beef, walk away. Yeah.

Alright. Not crying anymore. Alright. Here we go. Final one. Wrapping out the 27 characteristics of the modern man from The New York Times as contrasted by whatever the life in the past takes as an urban gentleman. Yeah. Sneeze. Number 27, people aren't sure if the modern man is a good dancer or not. That is until the DJ plays his jam, and he goes out there and puts on a clinic. Here's a deal, man. Urban general gentleman does not have a a jam. He he he digs on music. I'm not saying he doesn't, but he doesn't have, like, a specific, oh, that's my jam. Like, that doesn't Carson, name one of your jam. The Numa Numa song. Alright. Ozone. A few bars of it. It's in the, you know, the different name. You know the the one on the Hey, man. That's not a few bars of that song. Mario. Mario.

Give me a few bars of what I'm saying. You know, there's the deal. Walk the dinosaur comes on. I'm doing it. You can find my feet doing the two two waps. Everybody walk the dinosaur. Yeah. I think here's the deal. So I think the urban general can put on a clinic. Yeah. CNC music factory. Here, I put it in the same put it in same category as the Melon Baller. If you're gonna be involved in something,

there's no reason you shy away from stuff and not produce the right deal. Yeah. Mhmm. If you're sitting at the edge of the dance floor thinking, man, I wanna dance. No. You get out there and dance. You shouldn't have to think about it. Just get out there and stuff. Urban gentleman doesn't scan the scene and say, will this play? Is it is it time? Wrong. Is it time? He goes, hey, man. Let's do this. And then hops out and dances. He weeps a little. He cries a little bit, but not often. Yeah. And he dances to walk the dinosaur. There's times too that I made a song in my gym, like, when it was senior prom or whatever. I was wearing cape and a top hat, and I was like, I'm gonna make them play sharp dressed man, and I'm gonna get out there, and I'm gonna make this thing my own. Andrew Carson. ZZ Top was not talking about cape at Top Hat when he made that on it. Made it happen? Yeah. Now hold on. It's it's it's incredibly hard to dance to Sharp Dressed Man. Oh, I did it. It was good. Mean, you could do nothing but the white man's way to sharp dressed man. That's alright. You kinda just do one of these, and that's what you got. Yeah. I was wearing a cape and a top hat, and I made it happen. Hey, man. A cape? A cape. Like, big flowing cape thing. Hey. An urban gentleman's open to a cape. Yeah. Tell me, what did you do wait while you were waiting for a sharp dressed man to arrive? Did you sit there?

I was well, I was already out on the dance floor. Was like Were you dancing? What this outfit needs? Or were you there? I was I was dancing, and I was like, you know what this outfit needs? This outfit needs sharp dressed man. So I went up to the DJ. I'm like, listen here. You got sharp dressed man? I wanna play next. Hey, man. Urban gentleman does assert himself in a DJ situation. Goes, hey, man. This this song needs to go next. Now hold on. However, the urban gentleman does not refer to his outfit as a separate person. You know what my outfit needs? Yeah. Sharp dressed man. True. Urban gentleman doesn't say outfit. You you know what these loafers need? Sharp dress man. Now, Doug, you were a a DJ Boova. Yeah. Did did you take Kylie when people Absolutely not. Yeah.

I I agreed with them and then laughed at them as they walked away. Hey, man. This song needs to be played next. Hey. I'm getting paid for this. I'm a professional. I'm a I'm a 100% certain that's not what needs to played next. Hey. Yeah, man. I know as a matter of fact exactly what's gonna get played next because I already have it queued up. Yeah. Who's And you're wrong. Who's on this other side of the booth that I brought in? Yeah. You know, you notice how this table has my name on it? That I made as homemade time. Regardless. Don't don't knock me off my throat. I even have a cape. Got a cape. Just man played next. He wasn't a DJ. Hey. It worked. He was a pansy. Alright.

Alright. So I don't know. There's your collection. You can look for our, coffee table book, the 54 ways to be an urban gentleman because we didn't come to agreement on a few. Sneezes in the open. Or shirt sneezes? You seriously don't sneeze in your shirt? No, man. Seriously, if anyone has to have the negative effects of your sneeze, it has to be you. Urban Gentleman takes it on himself not to inflict sneeze on others. Urban Gentleman is willing to take care of the situation quickly. You're willing to take care of the situation in the long run. You you basically just decided to wipe your face on your own sleeve and then rub it against people. You put in your own chest, Jerry Widow. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. But no one else would know that. That's right. You just gotta deal with that, you gross. It's not like I stick my face inside my chest and go. That's

that's exactly what's happened. I've heard your sneezes before. You do They are violent. And you do them right in your chest. Yeah. You go in the chest. I just do that out in the air. Yeah. You're just a rude guy. Hey, man. We see the debris. Yeah. It'll get We may not we may not see you pee in the pool, but we see that debris. The particulate You got that face debris. That's the benefit of living in a broad horizon. Gross. Alright. You've been listening to live from the past. Thanks for hanging out with us so far tonight. If that urban gentleman conversation doesn't interest you at all, I'm sorry. That's just how the show goes. And so, there's no reason to listen to the rest, maybe. Maybe it just isn't your program for you, and that's understandable. Maybe you're a modern man and not an urban gentleman. Hey. That's cool.

Just go ahead and let the coyotes take your house. You gotta live your life again. That's what I'm saying. Buy some iron, man. You want a coyote laughing at you with his coyote buddies, sitting out how they're talking, they're gonna take your wee? Is I mean, is it more virtuous to to hit a coyote with a tennis racket? I don't understand this thought process that says you can't own some iron. You wanna find a guy that don't look like an urban gentleman? Find a guy in his boxy swinging a tennis racket at a coyote. You get out of here. It only makes me want to swing a tennis racket at a coyote. Could I actually do can I have, like Now here's the deal? This has happened to me in the last year. So I I I had coyotes that were eating my chickens. Right? And so here's what I did. I went out to my truck about, say, five in the morning, and I sat in the truck two hours before I had to go to work with no weapon, no iron. And I thought, what am I gonna do? Get out and yell at him? Get away from the chicken. He don't speak English by kids. So I borrowed a weapon, and I sat there the next morning for the next two hours, crushing it. Like, it me me and it were one, and we were gonna tear up some coyote.

Well, eventually, he never showed up until another guy decided he was gonna come help me, and then he shot the coyote. So I actually never I mean, I fired one off just because I was getting bored. Yeah. I knew that was coming. Yeah. There's no way that's already in that way. Plus, wanted the coyotes to know, like, hey. Mike Mike's here. You know, I'm gonna put up with your business. But long story short, the iron got the coyotes away. Eric, you were in The Middle East. Did you ever shoot a weapon in the air like they show on the news all the time? People get excited? Into the air? Yeah. Myself? No. Were you a part of some sort of celebration where people are firing weapons? Yes. Oh, yeah. And the day they caught Saddam, I I was there. It was awesome. And they and they were they were celebrating.

Yeah. They they were glad to see that guy gone. Oh, man. Yeah. I just I mean, those people look like they're having a good time. Yeah. Our weapon stories about some guy, you know, getting getting shot somewhere that did the wrong thing or or shouldn't have been killed at all. Those guys are like firing weapons in the air like they're throwing a pinata. Yeah. Yeah. It was actually my first experience in a in a war zone hearing that. I've been in the in Latin America, and they'll celebrate as well when, their country just won, you know, World Cup soccer or something. And, so I was in Costa Rica, I heard it. I was in Venezuela. No. I actually, they didn't. Never mind. They didn't do so well. But my first time no, seriously. So my first time in Iraq, I hear it, and I I only heard the weapons fire. And so we had to take cover because I couldn't hear car horns. Okay. That's what makes the difference between celebration versus,

you know, the cities erupted in chaos. Right. Right. Car Car horns. Yes. You know, everyone's honking their horns if they're celebrating. Oh. That's that's the difference. Mhmm. That is good to know. Yeah. Is that the way is that the, If you find yourself in Syria sometime, you know, just bear that in mind that, you know, if you you hear gunfire and car horns Celebration. They're celebrating. Yeah. Just gunfire alone? Take cover. Yeah. Just gunfire, you're in Compton. Yeah. That's church is the Compton, Comma, Syria. Could you swap out a car horn for, like, a Vuvuzela? Is that alright? A what? A Vuvuzela? Soccer horns. They don't have them over there. They don't. That was totally commercialized, Ben. Yeah. You fell into the American trap thinking everybody owns a vuvuzela. It's a white guy thing. Why would anyone have that when they've got a gun? Hey, man. I own it. That's true. That's true. I have a vuvuzela. I do not have a gun. Yeah. Urban gentleman, weapon. Loser, Vuvuzela.

Oh, crap. And if he has a choice between one or the other and he picks up the Vuvuzela. That dude's just trying to make some noise. He's the he's the Michael Bolton of celebratory guys. Lame. Yeah. Okay. Hey, man. Alright. You're listening live from the past. Hey. Big thanks to Bob Eisenhower with the Eisenhower team. Go to eisenhowerteam.com for all your home buying and selling needs. Good old Bob is is always out to I know he's doing the he's doing the real work. We get in here and chat about business about the Shire and the weapons and the shoe horns and stuff. Bob does legitimate work, helping you find the the right home for you and your family. And here here's the only I've worked with him more than once,

and he's always great at finding the right properties that we want. Always done a great job of helping me understand, you know, like, what what my house would be worth, how we can rightly position it and sell it well. Like, here's what I don't want. I don't want some guy telling me it's gonna sell for another $10 than what it's gonna sell for. That doesn't do me any good. Right? I'm gonna sit on a house for six months. But I also wanna make sure I get the right the right amount out of it, get what's worth. And Bob and his team have always been really great about that, helping price the house right, helping us find the the right place to go next. And I don't know. Just the process was dead easy. So go to Bob, but go to iceandautoteam.com. You're looking for Bob, and he'd be able to help you out that. And even if you're not looking to buy or sell a home, I don't know, give him a call, shoot him an email, creep outside of that free truck that they give you and just say, hey, man. Thanks for sponsoring Life in the Path. He's the reason to, I don't know, half of the stuff gets on the air. The other half, I there's no explanation for it. I think Bob would just own it as well. You're very welcome. Alright.

So let's see. Do I remember a couple somebody have Pope style? Pope style? No? I thought you brought up the Pope style. I thought you had it. I think Herrick had a potential.

I could go. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. How much time do we have? Have? Time. I'm checking. We got about ten minutes until the break. Okay. This has to do with, our our plans, how we handle life and and things like that. K. So and recently in in life, I've just been, actually kinda overwhelmed by all kinds of different things and and just facing some weird things. And so the end of my days tend to kinda fall apart and and, God's actually been helping to put me back together through,

and my first point of, Pope style is if you're facing anxiety is, try try songs that are gonna point you to God, songs that are just gonna praise him, refocus your mind back on him. And it'll also help to fill the room that you're in because, you know, who knows what kind of other spiritual forces are there. Obviously, God exists and and he's got things going on, but, hey, why not fill the air, fill the room that you're surrounded with with songs that are just gonna praise him. And, you know, if there's other things in play, then they're gonna have a really rough time hanging out there and trying to mess with your business. So Uh-huh. You know, turn to fill the room, fill your house with praise music. So that's my first point

of Pope style as far as it comes to anxiety. The other one that has to do with, the way that I handle anxiety is I I love just making plans. I'm a natural problem solver. I do it to a tee. I do it really well. I probably do it way too much. And I've been relying on plans and just at the end of my day, I'll, you know, just think about what responsibilities do I have next coming up on on the docket. And and that's been the way that I'll I'll tuck up a day is is I'll just say, hey, what's coming up next and make sure I've got a a good solid plan for it.

And really what I'm looking for is I'm looking for permission to rest. You know, I've been working all day and and I wanna stop. I I wanna be able to say, hey. Look. I know there's other things that are still out there that are still on my plate, but at some point, I need to stop and rest. And so what I've been doing is turning to my plans and asking permission from my plans for rest, and that's changed. Now I'm looking to God and saying, forget about the plans. God, can I rest? So turning to him at the end of the day, with just praises

and and just asking him for permission to rest. In the morning, I wake up and I ask him, hey. What's on my plate for the day? At the end of the day, I I turn to him and and say, god, now can I rest? I I've got other things still that, you know, people are expecting from me the next day. We'll deal with them to the next day. Right. If god says rest, I can rest. If he says, nope. You still need to tuck this thing up, then that's exactly what I do. But I just leave it in his hands instead of relying on my own plans. So that's my pope style.

Turn to God and praise him. You you can actually find something like this in in the Psalms where, the Psalmist, mentions, by, by days, I I will follow follow your commands, and at night, I will sing your praises. So that's my pope's life. Right on. Our our own plans can be a real hard mistress. You know I'm saying? Like, they're, they're they're set up by our own expectations, which may or may not be anything that God is involved in.

They they're they're unbending and they're fierce to deal with. Mhmm. And it's it's probably a realization of how hard our own character is relative to to God who was looking for you to be taken care of and ourselves who are looking to accomplish something that may or may not be of the right aims. Mhmm. And that is that is very difficult. It's very difficult to lay those down because you because you own them. But the truth is is that, like, the the real freedom isn't isn't is, I don't know, not owning them. Right? It's like giving back to god what is god's and saying I I I like that, though. I I like I like giving trying to get ready for bed and saying, god, can I rest now? Now's the time. Yeah. And and and I suppose, like, you look at everything else that might be weighing on you, and, and God says, yeah, you're gonna you're gonna rest now. I'm like, well, that's all I got to do. Yeah. There's nothing else in the world going on except to rest here, which I I suppose,

that conversation is one that generally tends to come up when we, simply refuse to acknowledge a Sabbath. Mhmm. Arrest. God builds something into us. We're like, no. Don't you understand, God? I'm too busy. I'm I'm doing this thing for you or I I have all these responsibilities. I wanna be a good husband. I wanna be a good father. And he says, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I told you to rest. Mhmm. What's the deal? What what seems to be oh, all the thing that you're doing, that's great. You're disobeying me to obey me? That's cute. I told you to rest. And I I still fight that. And then and when I I I can look out and see when my life is most wonky and, like, I don't understand. I feel like I'm trying to do the things I'm supposed to do, and and God just in the corner said, hey. I'm offering you rest. How does this it's it's it's beautiful, right, when you look back on on, how God even talks about kind of being in in relationship with him. You will be invited into my

Rest. Into my rest. Yeah. And that's one thing that I that if I'm being flat out honest and as we suck at that. Yep. We we we wanna we wanna show God, like, we don't I don't think we intend to do this, but, like, it's, again, it's a demonstration to God how much we love him. Look at all the things that we're doing. And he's saying you're doing everything except for the one thing I told you to do, which is I want you to rest. And it's it the thing is is that that's just a symptom of disorientation. Mhmm. Right? Or we're just focusing on the right on the wrong thing, or we're trying to handle

we're trying to push the ends with our own means. Same. Always the same basic problem. You know, it's funny, like and and it because everyone's had this experience in their life at some point where they've they've gotten involved in something, where, like, this is this is too much for me. I don't understand what's going on. I'm frustrated right now because I don't understand how to handle this situation. And, like, you've had someone come along, like, like, be it your parent or even your boss at work, and, like, you've take it to the right place, and the person above you says, I'll handle this for you. I got it. You know, like, you had a project at work, and you're like, it was going really well, and then it kinda started growing 15 arms and I, you know, it's it's out of my control. You know, and you and you tell your boss about it and your boss goes, you know what? This is right up my alley. I got it. I've I've seen this before. Or like, especially when you're, newly married or a new parent. You know, like stuff comes up with your kids and you're sick and like, yeah, I just I don't know what to do. And you call your mom or your dad and probably your mom, to be honest with you. And your mom's like, yeah yeah yeah. It's it's fine. Here's what we're gonna do. Here's what you do. Put some VapoRub on their feet or something. You're like, I don't know about that. That don't sound right. That's just totally legit. It works. Right? And so like, it's that it's that feeling of

I'm I'm holding this. This seems bigger than me. I'm not sure what to do. And someone in authority comes around and says, yeah. Yeah. I've been there before. I got it. I got it. Got it. Not just I'm gonna tell you how to do it. It's I got it. I'm gonna take it. I'm gonna take this thing. I'm gonna give you I'm gonna either give you a solution or I'm just gonna handle it. Dan, I have no idea how to do my taxes. First time I had to do taxes. I'll be over tomorrow. Let's straighten it up. I'll come over and do it with you. Right? And like for some reason, we do fight that, like trying to give that exact same principle, which you've experienced with people to the king. When the king says, look, I I'm not I'm not kidding you. I've I've got this. I've done this before. I've I've been here. I know what you can carry. I know what you can. You know what it feels like to let something go. Just let me have it. Yeah. Let me have it. I do. And so, like it's it's it's it's one of those those seesaws where I have a real hard time because I know what that feels like to find a trusted a trusted son and let them take something from me. But the king who says, yeah, that's in my kingdom. I got it. I go, I don't know if you really mean that. Yeah. And he does mean it. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, you've been listening to Life From The Path. If you're hanging out on the Truth Network ninety nine point three FM, we do have to let you go. You can find more of the show at lifefromthepath.org or give feedback for us. If it's good positive things, things that makes us feel good, jolly about what we're doing, send us an email, [email protected].

If you hate the show, that's really understandable, but you're gonna have to talk to the station manager about that. He really makes a choice of who we're gonna produce the show one way or the other. Right? Whether it's on the dial or not is really someone else's call. I think that's Chris Roloff. You can contact with Truth Network. I'm sure he'd love to hear about that. It's okay to be honest about that thing if it's we're not your cup of tea. Urban gentleman drinks coffee. It's alright. We're gonna let you go. If you're on the podcast, we're gonna be right back with you. If nothing else, please be faithful in the means. God will handle the ends. You've been listening to Live From The Path. You've been listening live from the path on live with thepath.org. Yeah. It's good to have you back on the podcast.

Here's the deal. I'm not kidding. You gotta let that stuff go. Yeah. That's difficult. Here's the deal. Can you imagine the king rolling by your house and be going, I'm ready. I'm here to pick up the stuff. No. No. No. I'm a hold on to this. No. No. No. Not for you. Here's yeah. I'll I'll tell you from from personal experience, though,

what is what is awkward about this earthly existence is the times of which the things that my soul cries out for. My physical body says, I

feel like you're wrong about this. Like, I'm gonna keep this for a while. I'm gonna keep this, thing that you're anxious about. I'm gonna keep this, thing that you're nervous about. Even if it like, I'm thinking in my mind, hey. This is not a problem. The the god's got this under control. I don't have to worry about this anymore. And then my body's like, hey. Yeah. But get amped up, though. Get amped up and jazzed about it. And don't you think it's gonna happen? Don't you just know what's gonna happen? Like, no. I think god's got it in control. I was like, well, maybe you do. But don't you think you better get jazzed up? And, like, it's extremely difficult sometimes

for the things that I know, and that I deep down believe to see your own body kind of betray you in that way, or your own or your own mind. And I I I talked I was talking about this giving example this yesterday, during the sermon, but, like, there's just there's just times when there's something in my head and I'm like, who who does that belong to? That is not mine. And the truth is, it is kind of mine. Like, it's in there, but, like, I don't I don't want it in there. I don't believe it, and I I wish it wasn't. And so it's the interaction of kind of your soul and your physical presence of which there's,

it's one of the beautiful things that I think occurs kind of at the end of all things. Right? When when all everything is restored back to what god created to be, and it will be glorious where man and creation are are back in in good order. And the relationship between man and God is restored, but even the relationship between man and himself. Right? This thought process where my body doesn't cooperate with my soul, or I get things that pop in my mind that I feel like don't belong to me, but I still have to deal with. Like, that thing exists

in my mind, I think, for the same reason that all other there's disorder anywhere. It's all a consequence of kind of this this fall from what God has created to be, and that when when everything comes and is restored to what God created to be, I feel like this dissonance that is between the soul and the mind and the soul and the body, it is will be gone, and and you'll actually be able to live in the body that God gave you in complete harmony and peace. And you're not it's not fighting you for attention. It's not fighting you for the things that are important. Like, the the soul that God has given you dictates the the new body that he's also provided, and and just peace throughout your whole self. And I have no idea what that feels like for that to be the way that you live all the time. But, man, that sounds awesome. Yeah.

Things to look forward to, I guess. Yeah. What do you got, Mike? You got some deer life from the path? I do. Man, they're they're they're sneaky. There's some sneaky stuff going on. Here we go, dear life from the path. My ex husband and I have been back together for eight months. Congratulations. We were divorced for two years during which time he remarried. Oh. Congratulations. Withdrawn.

We stayed in Wait. What? Sorry. No. Sorry. I'll listen to the rest. My bad. We stayed in contact during his second marriage, and he says he still loves me, so he left her. He's now back with me after living on his own for a few months. I'm frustrated because he won't commit to me again. He says he has forgiven me for what broke up our marriage, but he will never consider remarrying me. He says he has lost faith in all women. He says one marriage to me was enough and that he's confused. He told me it's fine with him if I put my rings back on. He introduces me as his wife when we're out together, but won't divorce his second wife.

I know I'm coming on too strong and pressuring him to be the man he used to be. I just don't think it's right that he should get all the benefits of having his wife and children back with none of the commitment. Should I back off and give him time to heal, or am I trapping myself in a hopeless relationship that's going to leave me a divorcee? Hopeless in Missouri. Yeah. You're already a divorcee. Yeah. Right. You're you're just gonna be that still.

Hey, man. I don't know that I would work real hard on getting this man back to the man he used to be, because he was always a schmuck. By what you've described, he married you, divorced you, married another woman while cheating on that woman with you, divorced her, lived on his own, and now wants all the accolades for being a husband and father, but none of the responsibility. He never divorced his second wife. Yeah. He's oh, yeah. He's still with the second wife. He's still married to the second wife. I like to refer to man like this as a boil or skin irritation. Yeah. He's a stool. There's there's no reason to continue with this. Just leave him. Anybody wanna defend a man? Andrew?

I have no opinion on this matter. That's ridiculous. Hey. Here's the deal. You do not need the experience of having married a woman, divorced a woman, cheated on a woman, refused to divorce a woman, and got in the sheets with another woman to be able to speak to this circumstance. Here. I He's a stool. I refuse to have an opinion on this, Niddish. Not my business. I don't need to know about it. Good day.

Somebody needs to talk to Andrew about the concept of the radio program. We're gonna have to get back to that at a different time. I think we case. Stool, leave him be. Yep. Do not try to rekindle the fire that is made primarily by by burning crapola. Right? The man lacks integrity, and without that, there's no foundation for a relationship. There's no there is no marriage, and that's what you're seeking. So get away from this guy. The the lacking integrity, I'm gonna define very simply as this.

What he pictures on the box is not what's inside. And and what he's trying to present to the world as, you know, hey, this is my wife. If he really believed that, he would make sure that that's a committed thing. He would make sure that all the legal paperwork is in order. He would make sure that you're his wife in every sense of the word, but that's not the case. He's a doofus. The the benefits of having a wife is having a wife. Yeah. You know I'm saying? Like, being with her, loving her, hanging out with her, having someone to be, to have conversations with and be intimate with and and, like, share a life together. He's not getting all the benefits of having a wife. He's basically trying to steal the appearance of having a wife and probably enjoying benefits, I would guess, with someone else. Yeah. Yeah. No good. He's gone completely. He's a stool. Here we go. I like it. Secular says, I think we both know the answer to that. Your ex has stated clearly that he will never consider remarrying you. Under these circumstances, your wedding ring should remain in the door or seldom. While he may introduce you as his wife, you are not his wife. His wife is his wife, which entitles her to all the rights and privileges of her status as a spouse according to the laws of Missouri.

Be prepared to give your ex plenty of time to heal while living on his own. If he is confused, insist that he work it through his issues with a therapist or a good male friend who's willing to punch him in the face. Yep. Allowing him to stay with you while married to someone else was a mistake. You should have thought about how the arrangement might affect your children before you agreed to it. Yeah. I agree. I'm not a big fan of that, man. Nope. Here we go. Got two more here. Dear life from the path, my mother comes from a large family. While most of the time, everyone was kind and fairly respectful, there have been several occasions when gossiping family members have said hurtful things. What? Most recently, a comment was made about my 29 year old brother. He is unmarried and isn't dating anyone. Mhmm. He works two jobs and also participates in fishing tournaments. Someone commented that he must be gay because he, quotes, has guys sleep over at his house and, quotes, doesn't have a girlfriend.

For the record, my brother's not gay. His fishing teammates sleep over because they leave at 3AM for their tournaments. This really annoyed my mom and me. It's no one's business how he chooses to live his life straight or gay. While we try to distance ourselves from their comments, staying quiet about them is becoming more and more difficult. What can we say without sinking to their level? Hey, man. Here's here's the situation. A while back, I had a dude live in my house. Alright? Yeah. He, he was staying there. Had a job. So did I. I did not have a girlfriend, neither did he. My family insinuated the same thing. They asked if I was gay. Yeah. When explaining, hey. I have a dude that I I am kinda helping out and let him stay at my house.

That immediately turned into, wait. You're gay? No. It's not a situation. So sometimes families just do that. But here's what you need to do. If you feel so inclined, you need to have a conversation with them saying, hey. Shut up. It's not your life. It's not your person. Walk away from the situation. Stop talking about it behind their back. You're a joke of a person. Stop gossiping. I think this is actually the situation where the urban gentleman whips out the iron. Mike Mike says the urban gentleman walks in gun in hand. It says like You wanna talk about it? Shut your face about my 29 year old brother. He's in fishing tournaments. Yeah. I've had just bread enough of this. So, take your shot, Kimo Sami. I'm here to answer questions. I'm

here to fix this. Press release. Show your face. No comment. It's weird. It's weird to me. Like, the most, the people that propose to be the most accepting about social circumstances are also the weirdest people about, like, assuming things about people's relationship. They have sleepovers. He's obviously gay. I mean, do you do you jump to the same thing? Like, if they, hey, man. He's got a fast car. I wonder if he's a getaway driver for a rubber. Hey,

man. He could take a turn a little bit faster than me. Yeah. I bought steak. He's definitely a drifter. He's probably a murderer. I mean, you don't see everyone else I mean, it's like they they want the opportunity to accuse someone of being gay. But so but primarily, I suppose, because they feel like they have the burden of demonstrating that they should they should accept it. That's right. They want to show everyone how accepting they are, so they create a situation that needs acceptance, and then, just hands it out. Hey, man. Are you by chance gay? Because I love gay people. Yeah. Oh, oh, you're just helping out a friend? I'm disappointed. Yeah. That's too bad. I'm disappointed. Then you're just a loser. Really wish I could've loved on you. Yeah. If you were gay, they would've been totally cool with that. But you helping out a buddy, loser? That's terrible.

Yeah. Take care of his advice. Ready? Yeah. How about being direct? My brother slash son is not gay. Please stop spreading rumors about him that aren't true because it's really annoying. I actually agree with that. That seems to us seems to be fine. Seems about exactly what you need to I mean, I don't see any reason not to answer it. Yeah. He's not gay. Shut up. Here's what you do. They say, we think your brother's a gay. And then you say I think that was Mike. Was that pumping Hand to miming him pumping a shotgun. Skin that smoke wagon.

Here we go. Last one. Dear life from the path. I'm a 16 year old girl who doesn't believe in God. Frankly, I feel uncomfortable when religion is brought up. All my friends are firm believers of Christianity and attend bible study or help out with other things at their church. My parents and brothers don't believe in God. When I say I'd like to be a Christian, my brothers make fun of me. When they do, it makes me feel ashamed of myself. I want to be a Christian because it would be nice to feel like I belong, and most Christians aren't accepting of atheists, especially other girls my age. They might be polite, but they're distant. It also doesn't help that the boy I like comes from a religious family. What should I do? Sorry. I don't mean to laugh. I'm just trying to think of this circumstance. The the first thing that popped in my mind was you should follow Jesus.

I don't know that I have a lot more commentary to such a thing. Like, I mean, you seem to be getting into it for the wrong here's the here's the deal. I wanna say, I feel like I I I have responsibility to say you're getting into it for the wrong reasons, but I Right. But here's the thing is I feel like God creates the sense and desire for community and people. I don't think they I don't think the desire is wrong. If that's what if that's all you're looking for, I can think of easier social clubs to get involved with.

And, hey, you know what makes it awkward? It's the guy I wanna go out with loves Jesus, and I'm a little concerned to be a Christian. Again, maybe perhaps for the wrong reasons we're talking about some of this stuff. But, I mean, really, the answer is, I suppose, just to just to follow Jesus. Yeah. It's a fair answer. I was kinda I was kinda mulling around the same thing. I'm just like, well, you know, it sounds like you're kinda trying to get into this for the wrong situation. Like, you're you're kinda just being being go with the flow, but I'm thinking to myself like, hey, man. Jesus can definitely work with a go with the flow kind of person. And then, hey. I'm Jesus, and then work through that. Here's the deal. What you're basically explaining is someone saying, hey. I've been offered a job that makes a $150,000

a year. Not really that interested in the money. They have a plant that I like in the office. Is that a good reason to take the job? Yeah. It is. Yeah. You're about to get a $150,000 job. You're gonna get a $150,000, and you like the plant that is Enjoy the ficus. Does anybody really care how you'll pay this job? Just get in. Get in and get to know the job. And then when you when you decide you don't like it later, then you leave. But you can at least get to know the the job first, and then see if you like to stay. Who cares if the Fern is what got you the job? If you're attracted to it by the by the community? That'll give two craps. Mike's attraction of modern of bringing people to Jesus. Yeah. We need more donuts. Something smells weird. We more juice. Yeah. And we need to tell people they're okay. Doesn't matter what they've done. We love that.

I should start a church model of attractional style worship. That that sounds like the worst decision that's come out of the show effort. Me? I was built for this. I was made for this. I was made for this. If it doesn't work, I'll break out the iron. Here's what I gave you guys Skin this smoke wagon. To do this on your own, and you chose the wrong way. This is what straightened out Leontasia. It's one of those strange things out here. Talk to my 12 gauge.

No. Seriously. 12 gauge? Get up here. 12 gauge. Okay. Here we go. Okay. Secular's answer. I think you should continue being true to the person you really are. Secular. Yeah. Here's the deal. Now hold on. I see people say this crap all the time. I wouldn't be true to myself. Listen. If you were true to yourself, you wouldn't have to tell the people you were true to yourself because it would be obvious that you were being true to yourself. No. No. Yeah. Here's the thing. You're you're in one of two situations when you say stuff like that. Either you have been true to yourself and you suck. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe yourself sucks. And you're trying to give some kind of justification to what you suck. Or you said, I need to be true to myself, and you haven't been true to yourself, which makes you very untrustworthy with this proclamation that you've made. Yeah. Like, what you're saying is is I'm separating myself from the person I have been, but you are the person you have been. It's like the the phrase, I'm a do me. That's something that people my age have said recently. I I I'm I'm a do me, which means I'm gonna do my like, I'm gonna do me. I'm gonna do I'm gonna be me. I'm gonna I'm gonna be me. Everyone who's ever said that to me, I'm like, hey, man, but you suck. Like,

the I'm a do me situation, the me you have represented so far has ruined you. Maybe you need to walk away from the me you keep talking about. Yeah. It you I mean, you're not delusional. You have to be to get up and look in the mirror and go, heck yeah. Look at this man. Look at this man. Look at all the time and effort I've put in this man. He I love him. This is fine. No one thinks that. I've done that. He's he's been Well, you have 200 selfies of yourself. Let's be blatantly honest with ourselves. Like, I I I struggle with self confidence, so I kinda do the whole step step step in front of the mirror and go, yes. Yeah. You. Yes. Excited to be you today? Yes. You are. I created a firm block of granite, and I have chiseled it down into an Hey there. Hey there, Adonis. Hey, Adonis. Good to see you this morning. I'm gonna take the morning toilet, but I'll be right back. There you are. Hey, man.

Let's brush our teeth. Yeah. Hey. Hey. I missed you for a couple minutes. Good to see you again. Sorry, boss man. I was late to work today. Got caught in my own eyes. There was a handsome incident at my house. There was a really attractive man stuck in my mirror. Ten minutes later, realized it was me. Went looking for me when I went looking for him. Segular says, I think you should continue being true to the person you really are. Let me point out that if you're feeling isolated now, consider what a fraud you will feel like if you join a religion and must pray to a deity you don't believe in order to fit in. While many churches promote church related youth activities, you should explore what nonsectarian activities are available in your community. If the boy you like cares about you, he will like you even if you aren't religious, and you will have your self respect.

It's not easy feeling different, but sometimes it's worth it. You know, here's the deal. Some of that's true, but sometimes you're different because you're freaking wrong. You've done the wrong thing. That's a valid point. You know I'm saying? If there's a line that says free lunch and you're paying for lunch, you're different because you're an idiot. Enjoy your individualism. Paid lunch when free is available. So I I mean, I'm not trying to say that you should whittle your individuality down, you know, to be like everybody else. But sometimes the masses are right, man. Yeah. When people everyone says, hey, here's the thing. It's great. Go do this. And you're like, no, man. I don't wanna be part of the you're an idiot. Stuff is free, or people are having a good time, there's people to get along with there, or there's people that wanna love you there, and you're like, no. No. No. You're not gonna trap me in this trap. You're an idiot. Yeah. Yeah. So people always people would say, I don't wanna be part of the crowd when it has to do with responsibility, but no one is faced with a, impending siren and the opportunity to go into the bomb shelter, and they're like, I just don't wanna be part of the crowd. I think I'm gonna hang out to some fire drops. Free ice cream? Not me. Five

alarm fire in my plows at my house. Everyone else calls the fire department. I just don't wanna fit into that mold, man. I'm just gonna let it burn. I'm a be different. I'm a be me. Yeah. Yeah. You're gonna Jesus. That's the thing. Like, yeah. In the there is I I think God God creates very unique people that do unique things. I'm amazed at what some people can do that I cannot. And I think that it's something to be celebrated because it points back to the cool things that God does. That's not you, boo boo. We're not talking about you. Selfie. Are you talking about that guy that plays Sweet Child of Mine with two guitars at the same time? Yeah. Yeah. Hey, man. That's pretty sweet. That's the guy I'm talking about. He's awesome. Yeah. That guy's unique, and he said, you know what? Some guys play one guitar, and they do it mediocre. I'm gonna play two, I'm gonna rock them both. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm I'm in with that fella. Right? But but, yeah, there are some people who say, hey, man. I'm just me and I'm a unique individual. But really, what you're kind of a drag on everyone else around you. And, like, you because you wear that spike helmet or, like, you light things on fire and laugh. Like, that's not unique. That's just crazy. There's just something wrong with you. D and a janks. Yeah. Hey. I'm pretty unique. Fuck. I'm illegal. Like,

it's not unique. Alright? You're just you're being ridiculous. Sometimes sometimes the normal things that people do, like not setting other people on fire, that's that's okay. Yeah. That that Mike Tyson's a perfect example. Mike Tyson's a perfect I'm gonna get a face tattoo because no one else has it. Yeah. Alright, Mike. And I bit a man. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

You ever bit a man's ears off? I have. I bugged the system. I don't submit to the man. Yeah. He doesn't bit that guy. You could've worn, like, striped shorts or something. You know? I mean, anything is possible, but you went with bite a guy. Solid. You're gonna put me in in a box and, you know, give me the Betty Croppers and all this business and run me through your school season. Obviously. Yeah. Okay.

Alright. Is that it? That way you were done by That's how we got it. That was the unless you want another one. I got it. One more if you want. Yeah. Fire up one more. Okay. Here we go. Dear life from the path. He didn't have another one. We are not sure what to do about a nosy nosy neighbor I'll call Myrtle. She's nice to talk to, but quite honestly, I suspect she must be watching us with binoculars because she told me what brand of wine we drink. When my husband she might just go through your garbage. You're overstepping about. Might just go through your garbage? Is it is this the movie show? I'm reading the story. Just read the story. When my husband sends me for flowers, she calls me to find out why. If we have a party, she calls to find out what it's about. A few years ago, I was talking to Myrtle in front of her house and mentioned that I usually walk my dog in the morning. She responded, oh, I know when you walk your dog. Is that creepy, or is it mean? Life of the past, we have nothing to hide, but our life is none of her business. I've been neighborly to her, but it seems like she wants too much information about us and has no problem telling us all her business and how much she spends.

She's single and friendly with all the neighbors as as are we. I haven't asked if they experienced the same thing or if we're the lucky ones. How should this be handled? You should move. Right. Here's the deal. You own a property in a street with other people that own property. Yep. She lives there, has windows in her house, and she happens to be up and interested. So here's the thing. You wanna avoid people having either a rough idea what's going on in your business, you're gonna have to move. But, like, part of the thing that comes with it, living around folk, is that you might be around a peeper. It's just life. Or she's an ex CIA agent who just can't shake old habits. I'm gonna go with that one. Well, obviously, she's bad at it. Everyone knows that she's fired on them. That's true. She's not very smooth. Maybe that's why she got kicked out of CIA. Yeah.

Yeah. I think you gotta move. Yeah. Either you gotta live around a bunch of peeping eyes or you get yourself a lead catapult and some good coyotes. These are your options. Yep. Here's what I want you to do. Alright? Alright. K. So it's a valid situation where you should move. Like, you're just gonna have to deal with that. But what I want you to do is I want you to start doing weirder things. Like, I really want you to find yourself doing weird stuff. So Myrtle starts con getting confused and starts coming up to you with, like, a really judgmental stare rather than a Yeah. Really like, she's like, I noticed that, I don't really know how to say this. I noticed you and John were making peanut butter helmets the other day. Yeah. I was very confused by the situation. You taped a pizza box on your back and ran around nude.

You called yourself a butterfly. Myrtle is eventually gonna stop watching you. It's like, it's no longer like, oh, sweetheart. Why'd you get the flowers? And, oh, I saw you were having party. It's like, oh, I've noticed that you had a troop of little people in your home the other day. It's very they were all dressed in clown suits. It's very confusing. They kept running around in circles. I noticed you got a gnome army. You could also start bringing stuff over to a place and ask her to hold it for you. Bring a bring a fish Here's here's what you do. Every week, you bring a new garden gnome to that woman. Every single week, you bring a new garden gnome, and you ask her affectionately to keep them in her front yard until you amass some weird army. So you are no longer the reason she needs to look around because everyone's gonna be staring at her for a creepy gnome army. Or like or like a a giant, you know, salmon that has a has a dog collar that says, will you about it? And you're like, hey. Can you hold keep it on?

Don't don't don't throw he doesn't like the freezer. Just I'll be back in a few days. Hey. You can weird you can weird Myrtle out. He's shy. Don't don't roast. And don't look. He's got a funky eye. Don't look at him and I don't wanna stay with garbage bag. Hey. Can you watch these? I'll be back later for yeah. Don't move. Make her move. Alright. Next time before your wife goes out of town for

whatever reason, pretend to get in a fight with your wife and then go dig in the garden. You know Myrtle's watching. Myrtle is totally watching. And when the police show up, say, oh, I was just starting digging my garden. What do you mean? Yeah. Just because I was standing in this grave doing handstands. Susan's out of town. Yeah. Right. Just make your gun shy is what you're saying. Yeah. Jesus has to be wrong, maybe she'll cut back, or she becomes more interested.

And then she has a reason to be interested. Yeah. I didn't know you had a pet fish, William. Me too. Me too. Hey, man. I shined a really bright light out my window all the time, like a like a fog horn light from a lighthouse. Why don't you call Hey. Why do you got this big light? Murdoch, because I think you're peeping at me. You'll say you'll say I can't hear you. The light's on. Just hang up the phone. Just change your front window to a mirror so she just keeps looking at herself. We go. She's binoculars looking at herself. Secular says, continue to be polite to your neighbor, but when she asks questions you would rather not answer, instead of answering her directly, respond with another question. Myrtle, why do you ask? If she presses for an answer without being confrontational, say, it's personal, and change the subject. Be sure to keep your shades drawn on the windows that face your house, and when you walk your dog, take a different route. Whatever. Are you gonna run from Myrtle with your dog? That's right. You're live your whole life in some kind of alternative timescape just because Myrtle's a peeper. Hey, man. It would definitely give you something to do on a daily basis, though. Still have to go out your front door. I feel like she's gonna catch you. Hey. I see you went east today. Hey, man. It really spices up suburbia, though, a little bit.

Like, if you're avoiding a peeper. Yeah. You kinda go you kinda go out the door and do a little chimney. Right. Exactly. You're no longer just like in the mundane Monday through Friday. Like, gotta figure out some weird ways to do things. You you gotta start tunneling out of your house and Myrtle doesn't see you. Like a goop or whatever. Right. Exactly. Mario. Get in it. In it. Get game and then compare points with your spouse at the end of the day. How many times did Myrtle see you last week? 16. Win.

Alright. Give a listen to live the past. Hey. Big thanks for hanging out with us on the podcast tonight. I hope you are you're taking your way to becoming the urban gentleman that we all know you can be. Sneaky. And if you have a Myrtle in your life, you obviously need the love and affection. Give her a punch and hug. Give her something to look at. Think it's gonna be a help. Don't give her see here, this goes back to feature ego that you have something to give. But no. You know what she wants to see. Hey. I'm not I'm not saying I'm gonna walk out in in the nude and just be like, hey, Myrtle. I got a breath for you. I got I'm a tall drink of manliness. I see you're thirsty. Like, no. I'm not saying that situation. Ever seen the dance move, the Moova Moova? Also called the Bufferfly. Don't make me do the Moova Moova for the Moova Moova. Alright. Whatever mistakes you made in life, this was one of them. Thanks for hanging out with us on live, Beth. Be faithful to me. It's God will out of the hands. Have a good week.