Live from the Pathway Studios in Johnston proper. You are live from the path. It be this out of control. Firing it up. Start one. For some reason, I have this thought in my head that instead of holding piece people for ransom, you held them for Ted Danson. Then I can't What? I can't shake it. Like,

for some reason, Ted Danson is involved in every ransom. Like, I can't get it to disconnect in my head. It just keeps playing over and over again. Your intrusive word association is the bane of all of our existences. Like you have to call him in Ted Tanson's voice. He's like, got you, kid. I I I It's not even remotely funny. Here's what I'm gonna tell you. I misnamed the show. I

have to try to predict because we broadcast on the YouTube. Right? Live. And so I have to try to predict what the show's gonna be about. And so I said, look. Here's the name of the show. And then your first anecdote is about Ted Danson. And I said, and what a missed opportunity. I'm gonna pee my pants. I can't tuck it in. I don't know what's wrong with me. Alright. You're You're listening to life in the past. Thanks for taking out. I hey. If hey. If you're Ted Danson This

is a hyper specific show. I just if you're not, just give me, like, thirty seconds. Okay? Go scratch your back. Ted. Do people need to go away to scratch their and keep going? I this is not for you. Anyway, Ted, we have an opportunity, like a connection type of thing. Like, it's a multilevel marketing scheme kind of, but it has to do with the program. And so hit me up on the Life From The Path complaint line, (515) 517-0085.

You're gonna have to call because otherwise, I don't know it's actually you, Ted Danson, and I wanna hear your voice. So what the heck is going on? Anyway, that's for you, Ted. I didn't even see us up there. Alright. You're listening to Life From The Path. Here's what we got going on. Here's what got going on the program probably

this evening. Most of this is centered around stuff that Mike wanted to talk about. This is gonna be a rough show. This is some bad this is some bad news. Okay. So see if I can get these right. Mike has a question. One on the story of the prodigal son. When the when the dad the the kid asks asks for his inheritance and the the dad gives it to him. And Mike's like, should we see that as descriptive?

Like, this is just what happened in this situation, or is it prescriptive? Is this how we're supposed to is should you help ultimately, it rolls up to you. Should you help facilitate people doing something that is otherwise harmful to them? Like, letting this kid call his, you know, basically call his dad in the grave and then ask for his money. Yeah. Yeah. Knowing he's gonna run away with it and and and squander all of this inheritance. Yeah. Yeah. With reckless living. Mhmm. Right. So that's so that's a question. Second item, Mike Mike has been

Mike Mike's found himself in some situations that seem not just youth pastorish. Yeah. Like, my background is is generally, like, hanging out with kids, teenagers. And Couldn't tell.

They don't even know who said dance grades. I don't know who that is. And so but, like, a really close friend of mine, like, one of their family members has been sick and they're coming into end of life care. And so like I said, hey, I'd like to come over and pray with them and stuff. And so I have. I've been stopping by on a pretty consistent basis doing it. And I

don't know, it's not like I can represent Jesus just about anywhere, but there's no formal training that a youth pastor ish guy would go through to be like, what normally happens here? Like, you know, like I just kind of like prayed for the things that I prayed for and spent time with the family and prayed for them and then talked to them for a really long time. I thought, man, I don't even know what's supposed to happen here. You know? Like, because you're not praying for I'm used to be very much on offense, praying for God to intercede in a way.

And especially when it starts coming to end of life stuff, like, you know, are we praying for to help it go faster? Or are we praying for no pain? Or, you know, like I mean, some of that stuff comes with pain and, like, it's a known thing. And so it'd be almost kind of foolish to pray it away. It's kind of built into the design a little bit. So anyway, it's just been an interesting to walk through it a little bit. It's not generally my I wouldn't call it my area of expertise. I think the heart of God is definitely available to do just about anything. But it does help to have done a thing every once in a while to be able to speak to it. And I know that Dan's probably done this way, way, way, way more. And so I don't know. It's just kinda interesting to walk through that stuff to be pulled in an area where God's presence and intercession intercession is necessary,

but like I'm not well versed in it. You know? I'm much better with a teenager in crisis or someone trying to make some life decisions or have someone who's got a rough home life. Like this is way more my area that I've been through quite a bit. But this other one is is I don't know. It's been it's been difficult. I wouldn't say difficult. It's been I've been stretched. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Alright. Let's talk we'll we'll talk about that one. And maybe for everybody else in the room, you can also think about either situations like that. Are there places where just in the then wherever Jesus has led you, could you think of a situation where you're like, boy, I just I'm not quite sure. This is my first time. I remember Mubra telling that story of praying to the house where there might have been a spook in it, like a poltergeist. Yeah. Right? Just like things like that. You're like, I don't yeah. I mean, I'll go in there and say a couple things. You know? Yeah. Right. Okay. Hello?

I'll in there like pee wee talking to it like the sons of Skeva. That's true. That's a squawass. Yeah. Stop that. Okay. Also, Dan someone has proposed to Dan to write a letter to a church like well, Dan, tell me if I'm getting it right. But basically, write write a letter letter like the apostle Paul would. Yeah. Yeah. Like,

in about eight weeks, it's my daughter's birthday. Yep. She said, I want you to write me a letter as if you're the apostle Paul and you write, like, say, first Timothy or something or to a church. And I'm like, wow. That's a she intends to keep around a while. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Long after I'm gone, she can read. This is what first Danielle said. That's cool. Yeah. That is cool. It just really hit me. Like, holy cow. Yeah. Got a word of encouragement to, like, continue on with what I've taught you. Yeah. And these are the kind of things that you might hit adversarially coming up, but, like, take heart and faith in the fact that, like, the gospel that you've been spoken to, gospel according to spiritual. What I know. Keep going. Yeah. That's cool. Do you feel I'm I'm pumped. I might do that too. Yeah. I feel like it's I'm ready to do that. I would have a much easier easier

time rebutting things that already exist than creating the thing. Like like like, Mike, what's your holistic approach and encouragement to me or to a church body? And I'm like, oh, I don't know. Interestingly, that's where a lot of Paul's brothers are that. Like when he goes to write, he's like, I've heard this thing's going on. Like he's combating things let me being respond to this. Yeah, he has some information. Exactly, right, yeah. I I've been told that you have been following or hearing the teachings of this or Yeah. This is the kind of thing that might have been lobbed against me and I would respond in this way and kind of thing. Yeah. Okay. Alright. We'll talk about that. Also, the question, like, maybe this is in the realm of how you think about, like, spiritual growth and stuff, but I'll I'll I'll tease this up for you, then you guys can

as you guys are listening, think about it when we come back to the conversation. But so in the life of David, he's got a he's got a military leader. His name is Joab. Joab. Okay? And so like this guy is loyal to David, but he's also like super loyal to himself. He doesn't want the throne, but he does always military power. And so he's constantly doing things that are that are like kind of for David, but counter to the way David would have done it. Mhmm. Like and so, like, he's on record of having stabbed multiple military men where David's like, yes. Yeah. I can work with this guy. And, like, within the chapter, Yoav is, like, stabbed him in the belly. Both of kicked these guys that I'm thinking of as a matter of fact. And David's son Absalom, like, staged a coup against him to get David off the throne. Yep. And when David went back and said, hey. We're gonna take we're gonna take our throat. We're gonna get back in there. But when you capture my son Absalom, you know, have no harm be taken to him. Yeah. And, like, you'll have killed the guy. Killed yeah. He made sure he was dead. Yeah. That way, he he put 10 guys on it so you couldn't finger him specifically. Like, generally speaking. Right? Yeah. Wrong. And so the the the the spiritual question is, like, do do you have a Yoav in your life? Do you have a thing which is, like,

you keep it around. You know it's hard. It's it's bad for you. You know it's harming you. It doesn't, like, represent you to the world correctly. It doesn't allow you or or to to pursue Jesus in the way that you know you should, walk in faithfully in the ways you should. But you keep it around because in some ways, it actually is still providing something for you that you don't wanna give up. Because ultimately, the the the actions that Yoav takes are beneficial to David. Yeah. Right. And he does not take action. He leaves it to Solomon. On his deathbed, he goes, Solomon, you need to punish you off. Yeah. He did there's a couple of guys where he just waits till he's dead. And he says, but who does that? Who goes, like, alright. I I let this thing fester and taint my whole existence up until this point, and now my son can deal with it. It kinda sucks. It's a sucky thing to do. But it just makes me think, like, are there things in your life where, like, it's a yo off. You're like, I should get rid of this, but you there's something about it that still serves you Mhmm. That you're not willing to let go of. Okay. Got You just think if you think if you can think of one. Mike said he had five. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So they came rapid fire. Yeah. I hate to be your son. Yeah. I'm I'm happy for you. Okay. Alright. And then we'll do some advice on on Dear Life From The Path. Also, Kassin is in studio this evening. Kassin, thanks for joining us here on Life From The Path. Yeah. I'm happy to be here. Okay. He's happy to be here. He's not taken in the show. He said, I've not seen the program. So he's he's proven a track record of prudence. Yeah. Yes. This is what I'm saying. He's like you guys, all of you that are gonna take in the first few minutes because you're like, Kessen's on. I'm gonna check it out. I wish I wouldn't have started with that Ted Danson thing. Yeah. It grabbed ahold of me, but No. I couldn't shut it down.

That's number six is what it is. Ted Danson's my yo. That's number six. We should make that a hashtag, do whatever we can to make that a thing. That should be a T shirt or hat. Wait. Ted Danson is my Yoah. I don't think we need to popularize that at all. I have popularized on live for the past. Ted Danson is my Yoah. Okay. I am gonna change the name of the show, though, like, sure. So of course. Yeah. Before the podcast release. You can't you can't miss out on a tagline like That just grabs a person. Okay. Alright. So let's let's talk about first, Mike, let's talk about this this

bedside manner. The situation of which you are you beyond the normal measures of youth pastoring. Yeah. So, like, obviously, like youth pastor has its own, you know, say it has its own set of connotations and the way that it operates, it's usually pretty not formal. Right? Like it has to do with like, normally when I would give advice to people, this goes for anybody that had spends time working with youth, but like, it's gonna take years for you to become unoffendable

and able to talk to kids in a way that you're not talking down to them. If you can do those two things, you will grab their attention because no one treats them that way. And so like, you can't be easily offended and you gotta be able to be interrupted and it's not a big deal and it doesn't hurt your ego. And then you have to figure out how to not put on your grandpa storytelling hat and talk down to kids. You just need to talk to them at their level and straightforward and be honest with them. And so this has served me pretty well. Like God has put me in a place where like I think he's gifted me to be in. So like it's always going really well. But I've never done like big pastor things. I don't give sermons. Do know what I'm saying? Like I teach a thing. I don't ever have a sermon. Right? But very rarely do people come up looking for me to resolve a conflict or be part of a Like I mean, I pray for people. I know the things that they're asking me to pray for. And I've been in a couple, three, four situations here recently where I've like gotten in between and tried to work some things out with some folks. But like in general, like I teach, I bring soda and then we say, look, here's a place you will always be loved. And that's basically my gig. So like recently there's a friend of mine that

their grandma was sick and she came home to hospice at home. And I thought, man, I should go over there and pray with her. And I'm like, I'm not this is a job for a real pastor. You know what I'm saying? Like this is not Mike a thing to do. You know? But I'm like, I love these people, and I do wanna go over there and pray for them. So, like, I'll I'll go. I'll just go over there. And so I did. And I went over and I thought, I'm gonna pray for her, but I don't know what to ask God for really. Because it's not a show because I'm not a skilled hospice pastor. I don't have like a set of things that I would say. And so I thought, in this exact situation, what am I really asking for here? So like ultimately, I ended up praying for like peace for her heart and peace for her thoughts that they wouldn't be overcome by fear of not knowing what's coming next. And that God would make her feel loved and hugged

and comforted as he transitions out of this thing. But I actually didn't know how much of her own situation she knew. And so I'm like, I mean, this is the thing what I say out loud to God, but am I spilling the beans here? Maybe the gal is not a 100% sure that she's on her way to meeting Jesus. And I'm like, this is just really stretch uncharted territory for me. And I wasn't so worried about it that I wasn't praying. I prayed with the family too for strength and energy for them because caring for people that are passing away with an undetermined date, it's just draining

and your whole life goes on pause while you concentrate on this thing. So I prayed for all that stuff. So it was good. I think, I don't know exactly, I just kind of prayed and then sat and held her hand and just listened to stories of her life and all the great things that she'd been a part of and talked to her kids and stuff. It was great. Like, don't have anything that I was really against it, but then I thought I still felt after day two, day three, I just kept showing back up and praying some more. And I thought, Is it possible they'd have been better served by a guy that has done this before? That has been walked through this because I don't know what to expect. It's not my area. And so I don't know, it's just real interesting to feel

God stretching in you away. And I know there's always been one If family a creed or something or a thing that we live by, it's always the Fuso show up. So like it doesn't really matter if we know what to do or we have the resources to help. We always just show up a place. Like whatever's happening, we can always just go at least. We can at least be there. And so I thought this applies, so I'm gonna go. This is what we're gonna do. And like it's been interesting to me. Like it's been what feels like a stretch in me because like I don't have to have a quippy answer. I don't have try to come up with a way to relate the thing to whatever's going on at school and why your parents are the way they are. Like it's just completely out of my ballpark. And so I don't know. Have you guys been through this? I know Dan, you said like you've been through this quite a bit. Yeah. I mean, honestly, it sounds like you did everything right. Mean, it's it's

it's much more important that you're there with the right heart than that you're there with the right words. Yeah. You know, and and you know that. I mean, you know, she knew that. Yeah. You you know? I mean, you're you're being part of, like, one of the most holy moments in our life. It's you're about to shed the tent, you know, and go to eternity. There there there's no, like, hey, next week, we're gonna talk about, you know, growth. You know? I mean, it's like it's it's like, are are you ready? You're you're about to meet Jesus. You're you are about to open your eyes in the presence of Jesus. Are you ready for that? And then you kinda go from there. If they're like, crap. I know. Then that's a conversation. Well, let's get you ready. Yeah. And if it's like, yeah, it's like, man, you're gonna have some discomfort because that's our body your body's gonna fight this, but your soul's about to soar. I mean, you're about to go to a place. All that pain is gonna be gone. Every tear is gone. Everything you're about to be in the presence of Jesus Christ. And and there that that is just a holy holy time. It it is a great honor to be able to be in that position to be able to guide someone through that, and and it's a blessing to them. You know? Nothing matters anymore to them. They don't know there's no car payment. There's no you know? Or if there is, they don't care. Mean Yeah. Right. All the stuff. The calendar's empty. We're not talking about next Christmas. You know? It's it's I'm not ready to be Jesus. Yeah. And and

you're there as a a a believer who understands where there she is going and to be able to say, this this is great. And and whatever you pray for, it doesn't I mean, you know Yeah. Man, I think you're all over it. It's an interesting thought that like I guess it never occurred to me that I don't think in that realm very often because almost all the things that God has me involved with

are future things that I don't know how it's gonna shake out. Right? Like all of youth ministry is just saying a bunch of stuff and true God things and encouraging and loving and then go, Maybe you'll figure this out when you're 30? I don't know. You know? Like I only get you for a couple three years and then you're gone and maybe you keep in touch, maybe you don't. Like I don't know what's gonna happen. Where like walking through the process of dying with somebody, like I know what's gonna happen. Like there's a finality to it that like is not found anywhere in the things that God has already asked me to do. So I guess even you saying like you know where she's gonna go, I know that in principle, but I don't know that I've ever spent any time thinking about it in practice because it's not ever been a necessity for me. I'm like, there's always like forty years worth of life left as far as I know, and most of you are gonna rebel for ten. And so I'll be lucky if I see you when you're 30, and God finally said, that's enough. Come back home, son. Mhmm. You know? And so, like, yeah, I did it's it's probably even more of a stretch than I'm thinking because, like, I've put zero thought into that. You know? Yeah. Yeah. I

do think I I think the the it it gets to something else that we were talking about before the show started, which is, like, being a believer or a pastor as a role versus as a presence. So, like, the I suck at weddings. Weddings are not my are my not my deal. I've done I do them every once in a while. But, like, I won't do them just for randos because, like, I will fail them for sure. Like, I'm only the guy to do a wedding if you like really know me and you really wanted me to do it because it was me. Yeah. And so but the reality is is that like like that's the pastoring part. Mhmm. Like that's the relationship part. I I I remember, and I think I told this story on the on the show before, but there was someone who was talking about

the grandma it was somewhere in, like, I think my my wife's side of the family, and their grandma grandma was dying. And they're like, okay. Well, you know, we we're gonna have the pastor do the funeral, but, like, we we don't really want him to talk about all the Jesus stuff. I'm like, well, what the heck are you having a Christian pastor there for? Like, it's just That's that's kinda what he's gonna do. Like, any rando can stand up there and go, what did you think about, you know, Norma? And, like, walk you to the gravesite and sign the stuff. Like, this is not a it's not a role. Like, if you you want pastor because of what the pastor believes and what they know about your family and like that. Like that's the thing that you actually need there. And so like I actually feel no responsibility of being good at a role of people's perception. Like, either I'm the right guy because those two things are true or I'm not the right guy and I don't care about that. But in in your example, Mike, like, you're exactly the right guy. And actually, even what's unique to this particular situation, you're even a better guy than I am because of because your relationship with I've always thought this.

Finally. Let me tell you. We have to. We're on the same page here. Excellent. So like like, in fact, this is this is true in our house church and whatever. It's a small church. So, like, it's not this is crazy. But, like, I'm generally the second person people call. There's almost always someone that that they're just, like, close friends with or something like that too. And so there are other people who love Jesus. They will call each other. And, like, they'll call me. Like, I'll get it. But like, I just I'm not they don't go, oh, we need the role guy. Yeah. Like, they reach to their close relationships and people who love them and love Jesus and like, that's who that that's who matters in those types of situations. And so it does get it does end up getting into some awkward situations, though. Because, like, depending on that thing where you're close to them and you love Jesus, they'll be like, I don't know. I called you. There's something going on around here. Like, can you help? And they're like, I don't know. Because there's not a training for it. There's not a training on how to do the funeral. There's not a training on how to do but, like, I look around the room. Like, you guys are doing these things anyway. You're marrying people. We're burying people. Like, you're showing up at bedsides. You're, like, handling terrible tragedies and sitting with people on the couches. Like

that's the nature of loving and serving people. And like the role itself in some ways is almost a distraction or also makes it feel like there's a there's like an official way of going about it. It just isn't how the church is set up really. Yeah. It's how our it's how the it's how we do it from a western church. Actually, eastern church does it too. But like, it's not how Jesus it's not how the New Testament thought about these people. And so I yeah. If you can go forth boldly, it's just you're gonna end up some weird spots. Yeah. Actually, I think that that comes to like everyone in this room has been the first time you got called when there was a car accident or the first time you got called and a family's house burned And there's

always a phrase that sticks with me is people don't start talking about spiritual things unless the spirit is moving within them. And I think I believe that. I haven't vetted that all the way through scripture every last nut and bolt. Right? But generally, if they're willing to talk about God things or they're willing to talk about whatever God's existence, like, it generally means that the Holy Spirit is bringing that to their attention. Because most people who are running away from God will go as far as they can to not talk about those things. And so, like, when when a tragedy happens or when you realize all the things that you thought was gonna protect you or hold value in had your failed you, like it didn't stop any of those things from happening. But the truth is God didn't either. Now you're asking, how does this make sense? And now you're swimming in waters where like, you have to believe that God is good. If you don't believe he's good, then then nothing that the pastor man's gonna say actually matters. Right? Like, if you believe God's good and his intentions are always good and he can do nothing but good, then the thing that he allowed has to have a purpose of some kind. It doesn't have to have a huge devastating meaning. It could just be that it's part of a consequence of a fallen world. Right? Which almost feels like a cheap answer sometimes. But like it's honestly the truth. We make choices and the other people make choices and somewhere on the way, God's gotta allow those choices to take root and do their things. And some things He's gonna step in on and some things that He's not. But whether He steps in or doesn't step in, he is still good. Yep. And if you don't believe that he's good in the first place, then you'll find no solace in any of those answers. Yeah. And it reminds me, I like, that story I told in the show, what is it, a couple episodes ago where, like, someone had tried to to

was unsuccessful in harming themselves, and I went to visit. And like I I I did not know what to say. I'm sure there are people who like, I understand the mind of a man who does this, and here are some things that are comforting to them. And I've done it ten, fifteen times. And you're like, shouldn't someone call that guy who knows all the things? But it didn't have anything to do with that. I love this man, and I knew enough to go there and sit there. And I also knew enough to look at him go, I don't know what to say to a situation like this. You know? I'm I'm here with you. Yeah. And we prayed and we just you know what saying? Like, base similar. Actually, you handled yourself better than I did in that situation. And so I I just think I may this conversation in some ways embolden some of you, like, you're not the right person because you did a bunch of training. You're not the right person always because like of all the experiences you've had. I would say the first two qualifications are do you love and trust Jesus and do you love the people that you're going to go serve? And like, that's o that's a start anywhere else. Where people need something more professional, they'll find it. Like, it'll get there. But like, you will do no harm in coming and like providing presents,

Ian c e the c e one, not, like, gifts. Like, I got you some potpourri and a toy soldier. But, anyway, like, I it will provide Dude, why are you only given nineteen thirty five gifts? I got called in so I had my disposal. Anyway That's what he had in his workshop. Yeah. Got you some wax seals. Alright. Fine. A wolfy cushion and some mole wine. Hello, child. I brought you a toboggan.

Pray for snow. Yoo hoo. No. Anyway, I just I think it's okay. And I'm like, whatever. There will always be time and always be other people who will do the more professional things. Mhmm. I think your presence is great. Josh, I I've had it so many times when you're you know you're toward the end and they know they're toward the end, but they're but they don't wanna like, they don't wanna give up because they know they have loved ones there. And and I know don't how many times they say, you know what? We've talked in front of them and stuff. They all know that like, we're gonna miss you and we love you so much, but it's time for you to go. Let go. You know? And I'll and I'll pray. And and it's kinda like, I don't know if I have this authority. I don't know. I don't know. Have anything to say, god, I'll pray. What I would be thinking. Yeah. Yeah. God, I have no idea if I have any authority in this, but I'm just saying we're just we're just releasing we're just releasing this spirit. I don't know how many times I've I've prayed that, and within an hour, they're gone. You know? And I just, like, I sold with the lock away thing. I don't know if that's because I prayed or because I just could tell it was the time or or what, but but they were ready too. Yeah.

It's just a it's a You're like a Kevorkian. Dan, I'm not calling you to my bedside many times, dude. A Dan Reaper shows up. Move. I can tell. It's a it's a flu, Dan. Get out my house. I've got a relatively fine cough, Dan. We can tell you're holding on for us. I'm here to elevate things. Move. You

can let go. We've we've let go of your spirit. And I'm like, no. No. Dad, dad's here to take it to the max. I wanna I wanna build off that and and step back a little bit to the training from Ben. I I had to set the scene a little bit. It's been a long time since I told this story, but I was I was a camp counselor. Well, rather, I was 10 or 11 invited with the camp counselors because my sister ran the camp. And the day before all the campers get there, the counselors go out to the local nursing home to pray with some of the people, to play some games with some of the people, you know. But I'm 10 or 11 at the time, and I think a nursing home is hospice care. Right. That I'm there, and I'm praying. But

so we're going we're going around rooms and we're praying with with some of the elderly people and it's a it's a good time, but I'm on a roll. Third or fourth time, I'm in there. I'm praying with these people and I'm praying for this lady and I I we've got a circle of counselors, maybe six or seven of us, and I keep calling myself a counselor, but I'm I'm definitely not. These guys are all 18 and I'm I'm 10 or 11. And and I'm praying for this lady and she she lets go of my hand. Like I said, this is my third or fourth room. She lets go of my hand and her hand's raised. And I have no idea what's going on. I'm You slap me. I I've gotta stop to in my tracks and somebody else finishes the prayer and then we leave the room and they the other counselors asked me to not pray in the next room. I was like, what? I'm on a roll. I just got, like, got down to my fourth room. What do you mean? And anyway, so the counselors told me later that I was about to get slapped because I had played for the third or fourth time that god be with them in their final moments. Oh, wow. In the nursing home. These guys are just there playing chess or checkers living out their last you know, they got ten years left and I think I think they're all going out. I'm I'm there praying praying their last moments. Oh lord. She just retired five years ago. If her time if it's her time, take them, know. Yeah. Yeah. Down reaper. That's what I'm praying about. Yeah. I saw their supper. It can't last long. Yeah. There's no way they're being nourished in here. So Lord, take Walter. Lost finish here. Take Walter. If you ever ready to take I don't know the the sweet old lady's name, but, man, she was about to slap me. So that's awesome. Oh my gosh. That's fantastic. Been twice the story, to be honest with you, if she did succeed in slapping me. I wish she had. That have been so good. It would have better story for sure. That's fantastic. Take them, lord. That's what I where? I thought I thought hospice care and nursing homes were kids. I was talking. I just wanted to do the lord's work.

So when you're 10, I'm gonna be 30. He's like, old. You know? I mean, that's fair. That's wild to bring a 10 or 11 year old into that situation with no instruction. That's what I said. He said no training, and I had to tell that story. That seems wild, Kenny. But hey. And within the first couple of rooms, I feel like I'd go, hey, Kasm. This is a nursing home. Come here, buddy. They're not, like, on the way out. They're, like, a few exits down the road from actually getting off the interstate, friend. I'm pretty sure they were on their way out. Actually, some of those are gone now. The You're oldest person I've ever met. You have to be on your way out. They're on your way out for sure. But yeah. Didn't you just get into, like, elementary school? What are you doing? You know? Okay. So what's interesting about that is that, like, if you think so, like, training is one thing. Like Setting someone up for any level of success. Throwing them in the deep end. There you go. It's almost so, like, here's the thing. Is I as and this is the this is this is one of the risks is that when you're not a person who does it very often,

you sometimes feel like you have the burden of acting like you know what to go do. Mhmm. You know what I'm saying? And so, like, that's actually the thing I would tell you not to do. Yeah. Like, don't if you don't know what like, don't just know what here's what you know. People around you are hurting. This person is in rough shape and needs peace and calm. Right. And, like, there's probably decisions to be made. Like, you know what saying? Like, there's things you can pray in with every confidence that, like, you're it was it's like thinking at the time when I went to see that friend of mine is that, like, I don't know. I probably could have said some destructive things because I literally don't know. Like, it's not my thing to go. People. Yeah. Yes. You can. Oh, totally. So so, like, in some ways, like, you being around and available caring and even just sitting there going, well, I mean, how are you feeling? I'm it's weird. Like like, fine. Like, these are these are fine. You don't have to posture above

what you have at what the experiences you have. Like Yeah. That's the thing where, like, you're just not required to step into your perception of the role. You're what you should do is what you're capable of. God will give it to you. Yeah. He'll give you the ability to behave in those situations where it is appropriate. Don't feel like you to fit a mold. Like I'm saying, they'll they'll find someone else to say the last rights. Like, whatever. Like, there's other people to do it. Yeah. I don't even know what the last rights are. Ed, I don't know. Yeah. You you have the right to remain silent. You have It's Miranda. Say it. Oh, yeah. That's Miranda. Now kick rock my pussy. You have the right to from now on, you are going to be silent. Yeah. Something like that. I can't remember. Alright. You're listening to Live From The Path.

Let's see. Dan, okay. I'm I'm I'm struck by this Write write me a letter Oh, yeah. Like, from the apostle Paul. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And so, like, when you start with I, Paul, an apostle for the lord Jesus Christ. Wait. Are you gonna have someone else, Sylvanas, write it for you? Can I be your Sylvanas? This sounds like fun. I'll be your scribe. I've put some actual thought into that. Like, that has to be a like, conjure up a lot of things. And so without having to answer exactly what you might put in the thing Yeah. Like, what's been rolling around your mind in reaction to that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I guess I've just because it was like a few hours ago I got this, and I I was talking to my wife like, like, woah. This is big. Like, we gotta put some thought into this and and really do it. And let let's put some general ideas, big picture, and, some family things, some things of faith, some things of of of like a charge to this is this is the direction you should go, you know, spiritually. Mhmm.

And and and some warnings about about things that are to come, you know, in the next stages of life. And that that's just kind of generically where where where I've been. But I want it to be a substantial, helpful advice that if I'm gone twenty years later, she can read that and go, man, this is my dad

giving me something here. Yeah. Yeah. You know? And so, you know, I'm setting myself up maybe for a huge failure, but I'll I'll be gone. It won't matter. Right? I'll walk you through it, Dan. Dan, it's okay to let go. Swirl over and pray for me. I'll get I'll get down. There's, like, two inches of letter left. I'll just rattle rattle off a bunch of stuff.

She's like, Paul. Yeah. So I I don't know. That that's as far as we've gotten. We we haven't, like, spoken, wife and I, other than, hey. We should do something. Yeah. And that's where we're at. But What a cool request. Oh, I love it. I know. I mean, it's insightful. Yeah. What I don't know. Like,

other fellows in the room, when when when you hear a quest like that, like, where does your mind go to? Yeah. I'm not the right guy, isn't it? But where's the guy that's gonna get confused in the first chapter? Where's the role guy? I mean, if you follow like Paul, like, I I always pray for you, which is true. Yes. And I can say, here's some stuff I prayed for you for my whole life. Know? Yeah. Yeah. Right. And that that Here's some things you've done that brought me joy. Proud of you. Yeah. Like, in in being your instructor and your teacher. You have your faith in these Exactly. Like, I'm emboldened in my faith because of what I'm hearing about you. Yeah. And, like, it's interesting because, like, I I take it two different ways because I think of, like, if I'm writing if I'm writing style of Paul, I'm thinking I've got time left with them, and so this is my next iteration of that. But then there's, like, flat out, like, second Peter style of, like, I'm not seeing you again. Like, this is this is my last thing. And You mean, pour it drink offer. Right. Like, I would hope that that you would take the example that I've tried to set you. This is the kind of thing that I think you should care. Like, that's just that's wild. That's a really cool request. And I think has has has I'm super interested to see what you land on. Yeah. But I need to do two because, you know, I have $2 at both both birthdays are in January. I'm like, well, I can't do one and not the other. Yeah. And That'd be wild if you gave one the toy soldier, and then the other one gets the Pauline letter. Hope you like the toy soldier. Y'all got a letter. I got a toboggan. My sister got an epistle, and I got a toothpaste?

This seems odd. That's interesting. I I think that oh gosh. I I would want to I'd want to set the record straight on some things, like that I would I would hope that in my last in in this thing that I know they're gonna be reading forever, like one, set out just a few staples of of, like, exactly who God is to me. Uh-huh. Like, exactly who they are to me and what I would hope would be translatable for their life as well. Like the kind of things that someone's ten, twenty years my junior that like, I would hope that I could help them walk through. In my absence, they've got this. Yeah. And like there's certain things that I'd just be like, if I'm not there to help them walk through this, I want them to know this truth.

Like I want them to be so solid in like this is how my life is described by myself because of what I know about my father and what I know about what my father knows about me kind of stuff. And it's like, oh gosh. That's wild. Yeah. Think think about it like like the words that that Paul used or that the holy spirit inspired Paul to use. Like, the descriptors of who God is and how he acts continues to be the foundation of our faith a thousand, two thousand years later. Right? And so, like, the the weight of that that like like, I have to describe God accurately, and, like, he he can't just be my ex. Uh-huh. He has to be everybody's ex. And, like, this has to be his character all the time because he doesn't change. And so, like, just the thought that, like, when when Paul was writing his letters and and, you know, Peter was writing his and John, that look. You're like, the things that you're saying

can't just be how you feel right now. They have Yeah. To be Yeah. They have to be forever true of this is God's character because our the way that we follow Jesus today is based on the way they described him as a great high priest. Yeah. And you're like, I never would have thought about it as him as being a great high priest, and here's all the reasons, and it makes sense. But, like, if you never would have said that, I would never thought of it. You know what saying? Because it was given to me. And all the words that I'd write to use in a letter are probably, like, half stolen from all descriptors that have already been said. You know? So, like, the whole thing just like if if I think that's okay. Right? Yeah. I've heard that. Exists within some of the letters we have in our bible. Yes. And it's definitely okay. Right? Like but, like, the thought the thought to me is is like, I guess I never considered, like, if if if God qualifies the people that he calls to write to write like, if you felt like you can't do this because the bible's real clear about you not adding to scripture. But like like if like if God's like, look, I'm I'm putting out a new edition. I want you to write a letter to America and this is and and I want you to tell them about me. And you're like, I don't even know where to start. I don't even know where to start. I don't know where to stop. Once I start, I don't know where to stop. And, like, am I describing you accurately, or am I describing you accurately as a 43 year old man that has had x experience, you know, that, like, doesn't the the whole thing just feels very daunting to me. Yeah. You know? I've

as you're speaking, thinking I'm really gonna I'm gonna have to fast before this. You know? Oh, totally. I want it to be yeah. Not just a, oh, right. I'll probably have to handwrite it. I might have to take a calligraphy class. You got a month, man. It's January. I need some special paper too, I guess. Obviously. Gonna have to have a party papyrus? What a what a what a cool thing. Actually, what a great if if, like, the request comes,

like, first of all, from your daughter, which is awesome. Right? Then the second thought is like, what a thing to walk through just this week. Like, as you go home tonight and you get up in the morning and pray like, fellas, you're like, what if this was the thing that God had been asking of you? What would you say to even your congregation, to your group of friends? Right? Like, write a letter to your group of friends that explains whatever, your faith or or, like, who God is to you or who God is in general. You're like, I've never been asked to put it so succinctly. And for something that could last longer than a conversation that I couldn't fix in the next conversation. Mhmm. Interesting. Yeah. Like, I was careless with my words in a way that wasn't lazy, but, like, thought it sounded alright at the time only to think about it later and go, I'll correct that tomorrow. That's no good. You know? And, like, Paul's like, it's written. It's done. Send it. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. There's a finality to that. Yeah. Interesting. That's super cool. Because you figure I mean, twenty years after I'm gone, those words might be elevated some, so they've gotta be good. I mean, I don't mean, like, grammatic. I mean, like, they've gotta be true. Yes. They gotta be they gotta represent Yeah. They have to they have to stand the test of time. Yeah. Time doesn't get to change. Imagine twenty years from now, your grandchildren are reading that. Holy cow. Great grandchildren get to read the letter from from from great grandpa Dan. Yeah. And they have to be like, now I have to explain Dan in historical context. In his day You gotta take in and understand what he meant what he meant by weaker vessel. Okay? Like, it's it didn't it's a type of pottery. Yeah. Actually, I think I'm a be praying on that for you, Dan. Like, that's such a huge thing. I wonder if there's any as many times I've heard you mention this, Mike, I wonder if there's any guidance in scripture on how to how to go about something like this for for a reader, for us.

Not to necessarily rewrite as someone else, but if we were to deliver that message. I wonder if there's not guidance that exists. There's it's already been spoken on. That's how you usually phrase it, Mike. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I wonder if that I wonder if that doesn't doesn't appear somewhere that we can't think of right now. That's a good question. Like, specifically how to talk to someone and encourage them and

I think it's deeper than I don't think it Right. Yeah. I guess I'm trying to flesh out the letter. Right. Right. But just how to, I I guess, how how to write to another people, to a new people, to a different people that you haven't encountered or that you've only heard of. I mean, isn't that like the whole book of Psalms, David, just writing down your your words of life? Stream of conscience of whining. Well, besides that. Mike, that literally is just you're taking in any level of poetry. I hate poetry. It's so weird. You do worship. Dude, here's the thing. Them hospice pastors be ripping out psalms left to right, and I'm like, bleh.

Just sing it, and you'll feel better about it. It's weird. Okay. That did happen to me where someone someone was dying someone's sister was dying, and they they're like, hey. Read Psalm 65. Yeah. Should they're like, which which Psalm should I share with them? I'm like, oh, no. Oh, no. Dude, question the Psalm. One thirty nine. You want like a very intricate rendering of a Psalm that I can read and then explain to you, I'm your man.

Like, random psalm in my back pocket that I use situationally. Great. I am not your man. I mean, Psalm 23. Guess you worked. Hey. Oh, she eliminated that one at the front. She's like, I know Psalm 23. Which else was? I'm like, deep cuts. Dang it. She knows. Psalm 51. Okay. I'll be honest with you. When I was thinking about this letter, like, if I were to write a letter like Paul would, I couldn't land on anything serious. They were all like things Paul might say to his children, like, do not give your belt to Agabus.

And if you wanna use an optometrist, use a man named Judas. He's pretty good. Atheophilus is not a real man. Yeah. Yeah. John Mark has come back to me, and he's not as useless as he used to be. Do not you do not need a letter to get out of your second story. I find baskets are helpful.

Also, include in your letter how to write letters to other people because I didn't get a chance to touch on this yet. It doesn't matter how many times you throw paper, stone still hurts. I always survive, but it still hurt every time. I guess Paul's letter to his kids is funny. Ben is now gonna ask AI to write another Pauline style letter for Ben. Know it feels like you really want to go to Rome. I'm just saying

it may not be what you think. Sometimes you wanna go to Spain and god's like, no. Yeah. It was your idea to go to Asia, never his. Turn around. You gotta be in the bible to get half them jokes. Maja looks good in the pamphlet. For the last time, I'm not Zeus. Yeah. And if you could just use the word complementarian, it would it would eliminate a lot of things.

Be be more direct in your communication about ladies. Like, if a woman just needs to be quiet because she's a chatterbox, you should just say that. Say the last part. And to be honest with you, I just don't like long hair. I phrased it weird. You're getting gnatted. It's just It's a mess, really. You should have seen the headdresses in my day. And tell your mom, I didn't mean that I didn't I thought it was better if I never had a woman. I was young. I'm just saying I could get a lot more done in there.

Without someone anyway. Of course, we turned this into, what are some sarcastic phrases you think Paul might say in a letter? Yeah. And don't ever buy a tent from Agrippa. Stay away from copper coppersmiths entirely. Aquila. Crap. The joke was Aquila. Yeah. I chose the wrong guy. And Alright. You're not still alive from a camp. And I never followed Apollos. Yeah. Just

to be clear. Yeah. Follow the guy used to I follow Apollo. No one followed Yeah. In fact, he he he he doesn't even dunk. Apollo's doth can't ball.

Make thy own tent, Apollos. Who fed you in prison? Nobody. Dude, I bet Paul was a rough rough dude. You know what I'm saying? Like, he he writes these real nice letters. He's like, I can't believe I let a puddle. It's not that easy. Ship that one. Holy spirit. Can't even read chapter five, Savannah. Alright. You listen to life for the past. I I I I don't know. This is this is fun. We should all pray for Dan in this epic. I've been you're in a real pickle, Dan. I know. This is this is a real epic situation you're in. Dude, you're gonna have to have it leather bound. Yeah. For sure. That's not what I decided. Like, how how do I do this? I don't know. I mean Calfskin.

I'll get some. Maybe I'll get a stone cat tablet. Just don't like you saying the word calfskin. I'll get some calfskin. Like a hue like a human calf? Hey. Why did they start making notebooks? Human calf? Is the There's a whole there's a whole section of journals. I was in the I was in the Barnes and Noble. Moleskin. And it was moleskin. I'm like Yeah. When did we decide moleskin was, like, the hippest way to cover up out the of the yard. I mean, really? What? Do you how know many moles you probably gotta collect to cover one skin? To cover one skin. Okay. This is gonna sound crass, but those bastards are perdicious. I

have moles. And I don't care about this. Murder them. Make more mole skin. I generally have I generally am like, whatever. All these animals probably lived on this amount of land I have before I did. I try to live at peace with them. I don't like to I don't like Except for the moles. These okay. I mean, I think there's I think there's three of them, and they can cover about seven acres. Oh, man. I think at first, I thought there's 600 moles here. I don't think that's what's going on. I think there's three. And I bought this this liquid smoke from the old

hardware store, and it's poison. It's basically poison smoke. You fire it up like a dynamite. You toss it in the hole, and you wait till you just gas them out. And, like, you're supposed to, you know, see all the all the smoke come up in all the holes these fellows have dug in the yard. I I put one I took I bought 10 of them. I bought 10 of them. I'm gonna do some murdering. Bought the equivalent of agent orange against these moles. I'm gonna have 18 journals when this is done. Not the arist moles. Here's the really good news. It's a free journal. That's a lot of work for a free journal. I smoked these fellows out all over the place. I mean, I walked all the places. I I found the holes. I dug them in two sides sideways. I took them out. Okay? The next day, I go out to the backyard because like when these things burned down, they burned most of the way down and it just like leaves a little bit. Mhmm. This turd

had kicked it back out of the hole. Not only did he survive the gas He had a gas mask. But he came, saw the remnants of the death candle, and dug it and kicked it back out of his place like he was irritated. Dude, their freaking moles are terrible. Sons of Belial. Sons of Belial. I've had I played fortunate son in everything. I've had a mole problem. And, like, I got my father-in-law involved. And, like, there's nothing there's there's Father-in-law involved. No guy that hates moles more than a guy that successfully beat him at his own property. And when they find out they're terrorizing someone's else property, like, straps on an ammo belt, and he's over. He's the punisher. Dude, he's setting and he's retired too. So he's setting traps at, like, ten in the in the in the morning. You know, he's like, I'm a come back, check him at two, and then you need to check him tomorrow at 03:30. And I'm like, man, my schedule is not this loose. And he's like, 03:30. I'm like, alright. You want these molds gone? You'll be there at fifteen thirty charm. And then I moved kinda to mow, you know, and so I avoided the mold trails for a couple times. Then finally, I'm like, I'm moving them. Then I I mowed it, and then I put it back. And he's like, who put these mold traps back? I'm like, dang it. He's like, how? They'll never. The the firing pin's not and he's like, I'm gonna do some modifications. So then he starts modifying the traps, and, like, we caught a couple of them, but they're still tearing my They're

They're terrible. Alright. This conversation took a turn. If you have mole problems, hit us up on the life from the path complaint line. I just want it's I I wanna sympathize with you. I want moes, no moe. Yeah. No moes. 515 No. 517 0085. Call or text. Hashtag moe no moe. And if you could be specific, though, if I don't want you to just say, hey, Ben. I have a mole problem. I want you to be specific that it's lawn, like a lawnmow. Yeah. I don't need to know that you got seven hairs on a bright bright brown sitting on your left arm. Have you ever tried to burn a mole off like a like a body mole with oregano oil? No. Nail clippered one off. Yo. That's barbaric.

Yeah. Holy cow. I didn't know it could get worse than the oregano oil burn. Guys, it's like, I sawed one off. Butcher of Seville style. I was biting mine off. You should have said, hi. I'm Cassin. I'm a Visigoth. So so could you get some grub killer? That'll get rid of your moles. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. What happened then? Like, was it fine? They oh. Yeah. I'm chilling now. As far as I know. Some people say that. Wild story. After murdering. Chilling now. Yeah.

I mean, that was ten years ago. It was rough then, but I'm I'm kind of at my leisure. I got a third arm growing out my back. I mean, I gotta feed it. I claim it on my taxes. I call it Bernie. Yeah. It's a it's a vegetarian. Something seriously wrong with all of you. Okay. I want the sweet greens, mate. Okay. You're gonna stay till five for the pack.

Sweet the sweet greens. Anyway Another question. We need a new question. That oregano oil, it don't work. Like, the the the oregano oil? It just hurts. Yeah. Somebody told me you could burn this thing off with oregano oil. I thought you have to, like, freeze them. I mean, that's how the doctor would do it, but if you gotta go to the I thought that was a wart. That's a wart. Yeah. Yeah. This is wart. With moles too? You're supposed to go with Flowerskin, fellas. I don't know what's up with you guys. Put my elbow in the freezer for six hours. I'm trying to get rid of this thing. Dude, nothing. They're just sweet greens. I don't understand what's happening. Did I miss a part of the joke that the sweet greens thing is happening? Pitt has turned his bowl into a talking member of his body who only demands sweet greens all the time. He's a vegetarian. It's a feed me Seymour situation and it only wants greens? You're sleepy, and this bowl was like greens, man. Sweet

greens. Yeah. Let me get them them carrot carrot tops tops and and broccoli broccoli green green carrot carrot carrot tops. Tops. You have the carrot. I'll take the tops. Alright. Just the sweet. Alright. Before we give out some advice, let's talk about this Yoav. So the question is is is there something like Yoav to David?

Something that is like it's pernicious, but you can't seem to get rid of it because it has a value to you. So I'll give you an example that we talked about yesterday. So, like, anger's one. Anger's a good example. Like, anger can totally be your yo yo off. It's the thing where you're like, it it's it's it's poisoning you from the inside. You're pissed at the world. You're pissed at some situation that's going on. Something someone did to you, something you did to yourself, yourself, whatever, and you're mad about it. And you know you should get rid of it. But being angry

also can, like, ben it serves a purpose for you. It makes you one, it's it's kind of an exciting emotion. It feels like you're living too. Like, it's you can hold on to it for the means that, I don't know what to do with injustice, and so I'm gonna hold on to anger. And it somehow feels righteous to be able to do that. And so like and there's and frankly, there's it's it serves you and it's it's safe it's more safe to be angry oftentimes compared to being super risky to forgive Oh, or to not embrace the world in such an angry manner. Because like that defensive nature protects you in some ways of getting hurt in the same way of being riled up in similar ways or whatever. So like, you know, not to over spiritualize it, but as an example, anger would be one where you're like, God told you to let this thing go. It's not healthy for you or the people around you, but you're not doing it because it still serves you in some way, and you just don't you're it's too risky to get rid of it. So, like, that'd be an example of a Yoav. Mhmm. Mike, you said you had five? Yeah. Mine all came up List all your problems, Mike. Mine all came up once as a package. And here you go. Here's where you can see into the the mind of Mike.

Like, like, I'll cut it to the quick here. The things that I thought of are all things that I am worried about giving up because I don't believe that god will replace them with something better. Oh. And that's why they continue to hold. Oh. That's a that's a really good just to tie that into it, that's a really good Yoav example because, like, the question is is, like, for all that David have seen, right, they're like, he still relies on this man to do his dirty work Yeah. And not going, god made me promises. I trust god will keep them. I I will get rid of this man because he does not represent Yahweh, and he refused to do it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And, like, I mean, if you want some, like, some solid examples from my life, like, what like, I've always known, like, the things that would fall into that category for me is, like,

substance like, nicotine. Like, I have I have a nicotine nicotine habit rolling most of the time. Right? And, like, it's not that that others haven't succeeded in getting rid of getting rid of it. It's not that I haven't wanted to get rid of it. But, like, to my core, I use it for comfort. I use it for stress. I use it for a break when I need time to just sit and think. And, like, all of it equals an avenue where I think that if it was taken away from me, those things wouldn't happen. I would not find comfort. I would not find a break. I would not find time to just spend five and a half minutes burning a bronson or something. You know what I'm saying? Just thinking, like finding a Sabbath rest in a day to to pause and do this thing. And, like, I can tell you logical reasons why, like, there's plenty of things that could replace that. But, like, I think if you got down to the the the root of it, I just I don't see I can't imagine my life without it. That's that's what an addiction kinda looks like is you're like, if I lost this, what then? What now? Right? Like, what are you gonna use to replace it? Chewing gum? Right? Like, everything that I think of is a is a terrible replacement for it. Like, even the things that they're gonna offer you, like, you know, chewing gum or having suckers or whatever, I'm like, what a what a thrift store attempt to replace the genuine article. And the genuine article is doing the job. So why would I wanna get rid of it? Yeah. Right? So but the truth is it's because I don't believe God's gonna replace it with something better. Mhmm. And so I'll keep holding on to my things. Same thing is true with, like

I my wife will tell you this. Like like, my the thing that I'm most addicted to is convenience. Like, I don't like, it like, I don't care about food at all. I don't care what it tastes like most of the time. I don't care if it's good. I don't care about a high quality of it. I don't think, man, I could really go for x right now. Like, my I have no care about food. I just want it to show up, eat it, and be gone. Like, I don't want it to take very much time out of my day. And so I don't enjoy food or sitting down for meals. So that equals I stop at gas stations all the time. If I'm thirsty, I'll stop. If I'm hungry, I'll stop. I just want the hunger to go away so I can go on with my day and do the other things that I wanna do. And so, like, it's missing a deepness

of appreciation that God has created both in the way that he provides food and, like, sure out convenience that, like, I there's nothing that's stopping me from going and having exactly what I want within five minutes. Yeah. I'm within five minutes of a gas station at home or at work or anywhere I wanna be. So, like, I don't suffer or even stretch in a way that goes, if I want a Doctor Pepper, a Coke in a can will not do. I'm five minutes away of getting what I want. I'm gonna go get it. Right? And so, like, there's a there's a thing in there that goes like, it's very self serving. And if I were to just, like, have the stuff that's available,

like, I think what's god gonna replace Doctor Pepper with? Right? Like like, that's just so stupid. Right? Or fast chicken tenders. I could be hungry for the next twenty five minutes while I drive home, or I could stop being hungry right now and still drive those twenty five minutes. And then when I get home, I can start doing work, you know, like or go play with my kids or talk to my wife. So it seems stupid to spend any amount of time on it. But, like, there's a thing that where where God's like, look, I didn't create if there's a thing about God's character that is increasingly true to me, is, like, he he doesn't he doesn't do efficient. He doesn't think that way. Humans think that way. But, like, he doesn't do efficient, and he also does very deep things. Like, says, if you're gonna drink wine, drink good wine. If you're gonna eat if we're gonna have festivals, we're gonna have a lot of festivals, and you're gonna save money up for them because they're not gonna suck. They're gonna be awesome festivals, and we're gonna party for three days. You're not gonna take a half a day at work and remember how great a harvest was. You're gonna take a week off, and we're gonna celebrate this harvest that showed up. And God's very intentional about that. And so, actually, that drives the the the what probably adds on to the other three is, like, a lack of intentionality in just about anything. I can't be held accountable to things that I don't agree to. Right? So, like, if I were to say, hey. I'm gonna start getting up at 05:30 in the morning and reading my bible. If I don't say that out loud and I just happen to do it, then that was a win. But if I don't happen to do it, I didn't fail at anything, so I don't have to do anything. It's serving me not to not to be intentional.

Because then when I fail at it, there's I can't be held accountable to it. Yeah. And so that's true where then then sometimes my bible reading will just go missed because I was doing good god honoring things throughout the day. And I think, well, I was doing good, god honoring things out the day. I missed the bible reading. Not a big I missed my time with god. That's not a big deal. He's not mad. And it's true. He's not mad. But I also missed that time out with god. And so, like, that starts to add up after a while. And it was all because I I wasn't willing to hold myself within some intentionality that says, I'm setting a part time. 05:30 happens to be the best time because it doesn't conflict with anything else. Right? And so that's why it works. But, like, all if I leave it up to chance or I'm not intentional about it, then I don't have to feel like I failed at it or I screwed something up. Yeah. And so, like, it's serving me. Like, that that way of thinking serves me in a way where I don't have to feel responsible or hold myself accountable to a thing. And so, like, when I said five things, it probably is five things. It's probably 10 things, honestly. But, like, they all come from those three things. It's one, I don't think I I don't believe God's gonna replace it with something better. And, like, I know that's a lie. I know him well enough to know that that's not true. And then for sure, the the the life of convenience thing and the thing where where I don't live deeply. These are all things that, like, God is is trying to stretch in me. And, like, I know this because we talked about it a little bit at church on Sunday, and I was it was always it's been living in the back of my mind today. And then somewhere around, like, noon or something, like, that the verse for the tithing thing came into my head, and it's like, test me on this.

You don't think I'll replace it with something better? Test me on it. I'm like, boy, did he throw a gauntlet now? Because now I'm gonna be like, no. I'm not gonna test you on it or, like, I mean, do what he said. Test him on it. Give up all the things, and let's see what he replaces him with. And, like, wouldn't that be a cool thing to see? The thing that, like, the thing that I'm most afraid of and the thing that I don't wanna let go because I don't trust him to do it, he goes, test me on it. Throw it out there and then watch what I do. And I'm like, now I have to do it. Now I'm like, wishing Ben never would have brought up that stupid Yoav thing because now I'm gearing up to have to dump a bunch of stuff that I don't trust him to fix. Yeah. I think that's I I whatever. You guys you don't have to share. Like, everybody's gonna share something. I just want just just something to think about. Like and I I think especially in the context I think maybe Casan was talking before we started the show, like, in the context of spiritual growth. Like, it's just it's just a it's a question to ask yourself because, like, some things are are easy. I I should stop you should stop murdering. You should stop looking at porn. You should stop, like, mistreating people around you. Okay. Fine. But, like, a lot of the things that are blocking your ability to walk faithfully with Jesus and enjoy it

are the things that in some ways will feel a little bit righteous. And the the anger is a good example because, like, you could easily go, look, I'm angry because there's injustice. Oh, okay. But like, what did you you didn't you just stopped at the anger part. Like, you didn't actually do what you felt righteous about the feeling and then you got risky about letting it go and forgiving somebody so you could get hurt again. Like, I I get it. But there's a reason Jesus gets at these types of things, and they're just harder to find. And so if you're just looking for the obvious things that are gonna fall on the the the Catholic list,

like the seven, mean, I okay. You're like, I think I'm feeling pretty good about this. But, like, we're actually more likely to be start to be consumed by these types of things. And you're you're gonna find that your your growth spiritually is going to stagnate because it's like you've got some you've got weights on your legs. Yeah. And it's these types of things. Yeah. I feel like you're brewing something. I am. I I don't know.

So it's it's it's an interesting thing because so, like, my food has always been my deal. Right? Like, I've always been a big guy. You guys have known me for half my life by this point in time, some of more. And am not at the level that I once was. Like, I'm not catastrophically addicted to food like I once was. Like, I used to not be able to go I think I've talked about on the show before. I would not go five minutes without thinking about fast food. Like, I couldn't leave this studio without stopping and getting fast food from multiple places on the way home. And, like, I don't do that anymore. I haven't eaten fast food. As a matter of fact, Mike, you're the only reason I've eaten fast food in the last nine months. Did you eat it? I did. I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle it. Okay. I was so mad. I wasn't mad at you. Was mad at me. Quick sidebar.

Buva had surgery, and I went to visit him in the hospital. And, like, I forgot that he was not eating fast food, so I brought him a Baconator from the from the Wendy's. And I'm like, dude, that hospital food's gonna suck. This would be awesome. But he's like, I don't eat fast food no more. I'm like, I'm a temptress. No. As a matter of fact, I'm gonna call you eight and further than that. Because I said, Mike, I don't eat fast food anymore. You go, well, you didn't buy it. And and I went, no, man. Like, I don't eat fast food at all anymore. He's like, well, it's not that big of a deal. It's surgery day. Know. That's exactly right. And, like, and then you left it in my hospital room. And then at at 10:00 at night, I scarfed the whole thing down, and it was cold and gross. And I was like, I hate this. I hate I'm so mad that I did this. I was so mad. I Not not at you. I was mad at myself because I couldn't I should have just thrown it away. Anyway, like, doesn't it doesn't have a a lot of hold over me the way that it once did, but it still has,

I mean, a stupid amount of hold. Yeah. Like, if I'm if I'm looking at my life categorized as one that that is, like, bought for a price by Christ. Right? Like, I have been redeemed and restored, and my life is supposed to look like it's being sanctified, and I'm walking closer to my father than ever before. One of the places that this has not permeated into is this space. And, like, it's not as bad as it once was, which is enough for me to go, well, I mean, okay. Yeah. This is probably rough as bad as I used to be. Like, you I mean, I used to go to Chinese buffets by myself,

and, like, I would I would eat them in shame, and I would feel bad if someone noticed me. Like, literally, it used to be rough. Nowadays, I'm like, okay. I probably ate a little more than I should have, or I I went to the gas station and ate some food at a gas station. When it wasn't like in between meals, I got 8,000 calories, it was like I was hungry and stopped at a gas station for a meal versus going home and cooking. The problem is is it is very much so that, like, it is a lack of legitimate control. Mhmm. Like, it is a lack of legitimate control over this thing, and it is undoubtedly something that god has tried to call out of me, And I've said no. I have flat out said no. I've gone. It's not as bad as it want once was, so I'm gonna make up excuses in this, and I'm gonna be fine with this. But, like, when I'm at my lowest, the thing I turn to is food. Like, before God, I run to the comfort of the food relationship I have, and I I make concessions for it the way that it exists. And it hit me like a ton of bricks within the last few weeks that, like, I find myself teaching about my father to people that are like struggling all the time. Like I'm just, I find myself in those positions.

And I don't feel right about what I'm talking about sometimes because this is in the back of my head. Like, I don't feel right and I feel hypocritical. Not to the point where, like, I would go, I'm a sinful person. Like, yeah, I get that, and I'm never not going to be, but this feels like downright a rebellion. Like, this feels like god said it's gone, and I went, no. It's not. God said, this is out of the way. I don't want this anymore because it's stopping us. And I just go, yeah. But, like, I love it, and I'm gonna keep this thing in. And so, like,

it is it is a Yoav thing for me because, like, stops me from going off deep ends at times. Like, way more than I'll run to god when things are bad bad. I'll run to food, and it's enough to take an edge off. And then I can look at life normally again, and things are fine. I'll run to a store and get food that I shouldn't get, whatever that looks like. It's not as bad as it was, and so I say it's fine. But it flat out is an it's an idol. It is like I run to this before I run to my father, and that is unacceptable. Mhmm. It is unacceptable to be in the space that I'm in, to be in the position that I'm in, to be in the place where, like, there are people who who look up to me and hold me responsible in certain ways, rightfully so,

there there's there's a there's a communal failure in my in my, like, hitting rock bottom again. Like, there are people that hold are, like, are I'm responsible for now, and it's a problem. And so I I don't know. I think it was I was reading first Peter, like, last week or the week before, and there was something, and I can't remember the specific scripture. I'll try and figure it out. But, like, there was something in it that goes, like, if I'm if I'm literally supposed to be living like a like a living stone of the temple that makes up god's house and, like, I'm supposed to look this way and transformed by his spirit and what he what he's done for me, and I'm supposed to no longer look like I used to, This sure still looks like old Buva.

Like, this sure still looks like what I looked like ten years ago. And, like, I may not be two hundred and seventy pounds heavier like I once was, but someone could very easily look at me and go, that guy is the one who says that he's following Christ? Like, he has no control over this. It's a four hundred pound man that obviously has no control over this, and they'd be right. They would flat out be right. I would go, yeah. That's true. That's a true statement. Still got me. Still got me. I got no control here. I got no legitimate semblance of control, and this is something that I'm being flat out obedient disobedient about, and it's it is incredibly problematic. Yeah. I'd like it the the run of it is is to go are the things where you're like, god, I'm gonna solve this my way. The feeling that whatever the feeling that I have. Yeah. And, like, it's not like it's not fine to like, the feeling is the feeling. Like, the urge is the urge. Like, you're gonna have these types of things. It's the question is is, like, what are you reaching for? And I'm actually not even part I think a lot of

I've heard, like like, I I go to God alone. I mean, God did provide you community. You can take solace in the sunrise. Like, know Right. The things that god has created are perfectly fine as means of which to otherwise get yourself centered. Sure. But that what is not that is the three hot dogs for $2 at the gas station. Right. It's not pornography because you don't know how to handle the marriage problems you're having. You're feeling lonely today. It's

not anger. It's not like those are the types of things where, like, it goes, I don't know how to solve this, and I don't it's it's probably back to a God trust thing or like a does God care thing or like how might he even do something like help me with this type of thing. I actually do feel like there was what was I trying to give up? Was I think it was caffeine or something like that. And it's so silly, but, like, I think the first three or four days, I actually felt a little bit lost Mhmm. On what to do with something so simple as an urge is like, hey, man. I I'd like a soda. Yeah. I can't have a soda. I like walking around my living room like like someone took away my whole existence Uh-huh. For something that means nothing to me. Right. Exactly. Right? But but you felt it tangibly. And so, like, it's not that I and and I think what you're talking about will attest to this. It's not like this is not a serious thing. It's not nothing

to to have that type of we talk about it as a temptation, but like a lot of times it's a consolation. It's a like, I got a thing in my guts and I don't know quite what to do with Right. It or how to resolve it or have it not feel so strong. And so you reach for things that help calm it, resolve you. Rip a heater. You you know, you find something to heat or something. Or you like you just get the feeling to go away. Like, that's most of what people are doing. They're not just going like, I carnally want to fulfill all my desires. Like, they're trying to ease something Yeah. Sure. That's on it. And so it's not that it's not serious. It's not that it's not of consequence, and not that it's not difficult. It's just that, like, when you reach for the thing that quells it, that isn't where the like, if it's not coming from the prince of peace, what the heck is it coming from? It's coming from a piece of pepperoni. Yeah. Right. Exactly. Yeah. Like, god has given me the pattern to be Two points. Yeah. That he had that one stored up. He really did. He's he's held that in 2016. Brings this up today. Yeah.

Like, god gave me hunger cues. It's okay to eat. Yep. Like, it's perfectly fine. I I rarely ever do I go, man, I'm having a rough day. You know what I need? I need a chicken salad. I'm gonna have a chicken salad is one we have. I go Mike, can you please show up with the Baconator? Yeah. Can you shoot it directly in my IV? It's freaking ridiculous, man. Like, I'll just go, like, I'll get jitters. I'll get angry, like, when something stops me from like, when I get one track minded about it, I'm I'm upset if something gets in the way. Yeah. And it's the it's the dumbest things. Freaking it's 97¢

for a small thing of, like, cheese bites from a Walmart. They're gross. They are disgusting and are probably giving me cancer. Yeah. But, like, I get pissed if they shut down the kitchen section early. Mhmm. Because, like, when I get my harebrained idea of, like, I'm gonna spend that 97¢ on that, like I'm sorry. Commit. And here's the deal. Here's the crazy. It's, like, three and a half ounces of cheese bites. Like, it's not enough that I'm, like, I'm I'm really gonna die because of these today. But, I mean, it's stupid. But I just go, I'm I want this. Like, nothing is gonna stop me from getting this thing. And that's when I realize, I'm like, oh, this has way more power over me than it should. Yeah. And, like, I think it's I think it's a thing that's fine to keep around because I go, it's not as bad as it used to be, or I still have hunger cues. A guy's gotta eat. Yeah. But never once do I go. 90 What's 7¢ cheese bite compared to three stops at a Wendy's, a Culver's, and a Bebop's? Yeah. Right. Yeah. It's nothing. It's a freaking drop in the bucket. I used to I used to be, like, morbidly obese, couldn't move around, was on my deathbed most of the time, sicker than a dog. Nowadays, I'm healthier than I've ever been, but it's still it's still not it's it's a half measure. Yeah. It's like I went and did, oh, this is what Buva can pull off. I've not once went, god, I want you to own this. Okay. I want you to own this and take it from me. Okay. That's a super, again, a super relevant from a Yoav perspective because like when Yoav, the first time he stabs the dude in the belly, David's trying to find a way to wreck it to to allow him to be king over both North and South. He's the king of the South, and there's, like, a seven year time frame before he's the king of the North. And he makes tries to make a pact with Ishbosheth dude Mhmm. To help kinda bring everybody in line. And Joab finds out about it and stabs the guy in the belly. And everybody knows this was wrong, and everybody knows Joab did it. And David goes, I cursed his family.

He didn't he didn't like, he was he should have been punished. He should have been put to death. He should have been relieved of his position. And David does the half measure. Yeah. Goes, I call Yahweh's curses on you. Yeah. Like, you silly man. And so, like, it's the same. Like, did he do something? Yeah. But did he do the the the right the thing the righteous things that should been done? No. That's right. He did not. And that's exactly where I'm at. I've I've done the half measure that went

on Buva's effort, I can get to four hundo. I can I've lost 270 pounds. Mhmm. And like I said, I'm healthier than I've ever been, but I sure ain't a poster boy for health. And I'm certainly not showing off like I'm trying to stick around for my wife and for my daughter. Like, I'm sure not showing up like I go I don't go to that stuff for comfort. Like, god has given me good things to go to, and it's not this. And he's flat out called this out, and I think the half measure is fine, and it's absolute horse crap. Yeah. Yeah. Alright. I think I think mine's mine's a little more hidden. Yep. Maybe culturally acceptable. Yeah. Yeah. And I I it was really when Mike when you were talking, they kinda like that's what I was trying I couldn't think of anything because we blind ourselves. I I mean, not not because I'm not good. I just gotta be adjusted for I I pretty much got my life together, and I don't know what's wrong with you guys.

But but honestly, like, I I don't rest well. Mhmm. Yeah. Sure. Because I think like and it's not that I think that I'm Superman or that I'm the only one can who can do things, but I sure act like it. Mhmm. Yeah. You know? I want I want and part of it is because I want I wanna do everything. I love everything. I love life. I love ministry. I love kingdom work, and I wanna do it all. And I wanna do it every day, and I don't wanna stop. Uh-huh. I don't take vacations. I don't take days off. I don't you know? And it's really unbiblical. Yeah. Yeah. Right. But I think, yeah, but it's for good. It's for God. That's right. Right. Right. It's accomplishing the ends that god wanted and so Yeah. So therefore, I'm exempt. Yeah. Yep. I think I think I wanna go opposite that a bit and say that I my is is that I'm satiated, that I'm content. Built a little bit off yours too, is that for a long time, for the last seven, eight years, I've been content. I haven't been focused on growth. I've been I've been gifted.

I know, Bubba, you talked about no as an answer to a prayer, but I've been gifted a lot of yeses. I've been have had a lot of prayers answered and equipped to go out and do god's work, but I was content that I was just okay with where I was at. I didn't need to grow. I was accomplishing what I needed to do, and I was satiated. I didn't I didn't need anything else. And I was just refusing the opportunities he was giving me Mhmm. Even when he was answering those prayers and giving me everything I needed to to go forward and to make the next move to to step forward into his light, into his mission. And I was just choosing, you know, this is really comfortable. I like I like where I'm at. I like what I have earthly. I like what I'm getting. I like what I'm on track for. And so that was a really, really hard thing to step into and give up and and kinda give to God. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. And it and it's it's got the same it's got the same thing to it, which is like there's a there's a risk on

whatever the the thing that provides you comfort, whether it's stability or whether it's move whether it's it's motion or whether it's food or whether whether, like, heaters or whatever it is. Like, why are like a weird deescalated thing that went down. Always a joke to you guys. I I I like the way you put it earlier, though, that you were scared that that what you would give up wouldn't be replaced. Yeah. Yeah. Wouldn't be replaced by something better than replaced by something good and good and godly. You're comical sis. So Well, no. I think I think there's something about looking at this perspective and going like, it is it is a trust thing. Like, it it is a flat out a trust thing going like, this seems to be working, and there's just this this this part of my mind that says, yeah, but let's not let's not put this one to the test. Let's not mess this up. Like, let's not push this one on this. Because, like, god, this is a space that I've I've kinda got a handle on or whatever we consider to be a handle on it when it's absolutely not. And, like, we go, alright, guy. We've got this one. Like, we're we don't need to open this one up to you. And he's like, no. I want everyone. I want all of it. I want every bit of it. I want every bit of your life. I want every door open to me. I wanna inhabit every space in this, and, like, I want your whole life life to be permeating that you are my child and, like, my light shines out and in. Like, want this. Because his question goes is, like like, my question will be, god, can I can I can I be your son, and will you love me? Can And I also be a smoker? And he's like, sure. But why would you wanna be? Right. Right? Can I god, will you can I can I be your son and do all the things that you asked me, and will you still love me if I continue to be a healthy eater? And he's like, sure. But why would you wanna be? Why would you wanna do any of those things? Dan's like, can I work all the time? God's like, sure. But why would you want to? Let me show you what this looks like, how I designed it to be. A little bit off the mark from what I want for you. Yes. Yes. You're trying to say to make caveats caveats for our relationship, and god's like, relationship covered.

I'm inviting you to freedom, and you're saying, do I have to go? Yeah. It it almost is like if you think of so Adam and Eve get booted out of the garden because they wanted, basically, wanted wisdom for themselves. God wanted to give them wisdom. Yeah. He's like, I wanna be the provider of you wisdom. You took it on your own. We could take it for ourselves. Yes. Now look at Saul look at his reaction to Solomon. In all in all his fallibilities in the future, Solomon asks for, he goes, I want your wisdom, Yahweh. It's the very it's the thing he gets right. Yep. Right? And so Like one of the only things. Right. It goes downhill after that. But like but when you when he asked for God's wisdom, God provided him all the other things that went with it. Right? Like, he got the riches and he got all the things around him. And so then if I think about it, what what what am I keeping off the table where it's like, Yahweh, I I take you all of your wisdom except for I'm not interested in your opinion and wisdom as to whether I should eat this whole plate of brownies or not. Or whether it's okay to say I get better. I have better relationships with my wife when I take sexual satisfaction looking at other things. Or I I don't really want to listen to your

whether I I feel it's right to be angry about this thing. And so I'm not asking for your wisdom here. And so like there's all these places where like the very thing that creates the the blessing from Yahweh, which is like, I just wanna delight in your wisdom and my whole life is open to it. The question is like, what did you carve out and go, you know, I know I should have gotten rid of Yoav, but he's pretty effective for me in these And so I think I'm gonna hold on to it and not do it how you would have me do it. Yeah. And then we'll see how that works out. It does not. Yeah. Right. It goes poorly. It goes poorly. You're listening to Life from the Path. Thanks for hanging out with us today. Buva, we were gonna talk about god said no to a prayer. Yeah. Do you are you are you free next next show? I'll I could try to be. Maybe? At some point in the future. Yeah. We can talk about it. Okay. Mike, let's do some advice then.

Okay. Dear life from the path. My daughter is asking me to apologize to her boyfriend, quotes Harry, for yelling at him when I was helping them move six years ago. Jeez. You have much? I had traveled 250 miles to help. The day of the move, Harry didn't take the day off work, so he wasn't there to help. They had a 2nd Floor unit with no elevator. When he finally did show up, he proceeded to slow walk, taking out the recycling stuff. At the new place, Harry helped somewhat, but when the food was delivered, rather than continue to help, he decided to sit down and eat while the other two helpers and I continued moving stuff in. This was ten hours into the move. That's when I lost it. I yelled at him for not helping more. All he had done in his relationship with my daughter was go to work, come home, and play video games. He didn't help around the house or show any interest in helping with their son.

Over the last few years, Harry has changed somewhat in helping with his son, but my daughter now uh-oh. But my sorry. Oh, no. But my daughter now feels stuck in the middle and wants me to apologize to him for yelling. I have made no disparaging remarks about him since. I even liked some of his posts on Facebook. I haven't gotten over it, but it seems Harry I have gotten over it, but it seems Harry hasn't. I told my daughter he needs professional help. The last time I visited, he stayed in a hotel for the weekend. My son says it should be an apology going both ways. It should come from Harry first. What do you think? Okay.

I'm gonna give I'm gonna give the simple part, and then we can probably talk about the rest. Yeah. If you were in the wrong, you should apologize for the thing you were in the wrong about regardless of whether he does so or not. Right. I just square the situation

to any extent that you were wrong. I'll give you an example. I in fact, I owe an apology today. I I was in my house, and my wife was talking to my kids. And one of them walked away and picked up their phone and started looking at it. And I raised my voice. And I was more like the reason I raised my voice like, she shouldn't have done that. But the reason I raised my voice about it is like, this is a kid who just cannot read the room. And, like, this is the the phone thing is a constant problem anyway, and this is like the the triple wrong time to do it. And so, like, it was just it was stupid. It was a stupid thing to do. K? But I'd overreacted at least slightly. The thing I was saying was right. I just there was I I went from, like, zero to six when I probably should have gone zero to three.

And so, anyway, I need to apologize to her not because I was wrong in the content or that she was not mistaken. She very well was. I just overreacted a little. Sure. So I owe an apology regardless of the fact that she was also wrong. And so I submit that that to the extent if you lost control of yourself or should've handled it differently, it's perfectly fine to say that. And I think you should apologize where it's appropriate. Don't hinge it on someone else. Either you owe the apology or you don't. That's fair. And so I would start there, and then you talk about at least all kinds of other rickety things about this particular situation. But, like, at its core, if you owe an apology and you know you do, then you should just go do it. Yeah. This guy seems like a real buffoon in many ways. Buffoon. Like, absolute buffoon in a lot of ways. I'm glad he's doing better. That seems to be a happy deal. Seems weird that, like, six years later, this is the only thing. I don't know I don't know if I would ever be in a place where, like, I'm not willing to stay in the in the house where my girlfriend's or potentially wife's mother is coming in because she yelled at me six years ago. Yeah. That's good. So I wonder if more is is complicated the situation. But still, totally fair. Yeah. You should apologize for yelling at the dude. It sounded like there was all of the things to make you be stressed and angry.

It doesn't mean you need to yell at the guy. Like, it could have been something you had a conversation about afterwards. But, hey. Like, we're all still working, and you're eating. Do do care to comment on that? Now here's the thing. I I did think, though. Like, regardless of whether you think he's wrong, when the food arrived, I mean, you could also stop and eat. That's also what I was thinking too is, hey. You should just sit down and eat some pizza too. See what Yeah. See what Harry does. I've I have a feeling that he would have just been like, cool. Guess the move's over, guys, and he would have never gotten up. But yeah. I think think the mom needs to apologize to the boyfriend for not yelling at him for having sex with her daughter without marriage and having children.

Yeah. Yeah. We're alone. Yelling again Yeah. Because he's a lousy slacker and yelling at her for having such poor choices. Yeah. She has a lot of yelling to do. Yeah. True. Coming in with the other end. He goes, you should never have stopped yelling. What? I'd I'd still be yelling. You invested in the wrong thing, really. It's like if you're gonna be Yeah. I'm not gonna be angry about it. I don't give a crap about this moving situation. Yeah. Harry, you suck as a human. And this is just one outlet event. Yeah. I don't I it is a little rough to, like, you're helping them move in together. They already had a kid at the The guy seems like a real pansy. And six years later, they still ain't married. And he's That's what it seemed like. He's still holding on to this. He's a working And he's a little bit better now because he does something better, like helps take care of the kid, it sounds like, when the kid's potentially six or seven now, and there's a lot less to do.

Just being honest about the situation. Like, there's not diapers and holding on to the kid twenty four seven like it was when they were a baby. Yeah. It's just forks and outlets now. Yeah. Just forks and outlets now. Mike, when are you writing a book on parenting? I'm super excited for that one. Chapter four. Oh, it's forks and outlets from here on. I'm gonna tell you right now. There's there's zero parts of the way this household is running that makes any sense to me. Yeah. Agreed. It seems odd and odd. When when someone that I met at from six years ago says, hey. I'm gonna fly into town. Can I stay at your place? And my answer goes, sure. But I'm not gonna be there.

I'm gonna pay for a hotel. Yeah. Right. If you're gonna fork out the money for the hotel, send mom there. Yeah. I'd like, how about I stay at home and you stay at a hotel? Right. That seems weird. Yeah. I mean Yeah. Probably cheating on her at the hotel. Yeah. This makes zero sense at all. With Fortnite. Also, like, when when she was describing him at the move, he's like, he's one of the helpers. I'm like, it's his freaking house. Right. He's not a helper. Didn't take the day off. It's his stuff. Most people who know they're inconveniencing other people to have a move, they're like, we got all the stuff we could in our Volvo and our station wagon, and we made 10 trips already. We need help with the couches and the heavy stuff. Yeah. I I don't know who traveled 250 miles to help with this move. The thing is is, like, you don't get to bring that up when you offered to do it. Yeah. Right? Like, doesn't matter if you're 250 miles in. Right? Like, that if that was gonna be a point of contention for you, you never should have made the trip. Yeah. But as soon as you did make the trip, you don't ever get to bring it up again. You're doing conditional generosity. That is exactly right. So, like like, what would be nice is to be able to find a nice clean line where you can hang a black hat on one of these people. And I'm telling you, all three of them ain't got a lick of sense, morality, or smell of Jesus among any of them. All of them are acting like complete apes. And, like, if they can the the best thing you can do is not get involved. Let them fight it amongst themselves because eventually,

the big ape will win. But until then, unless they're willing to either repent and change the way that they look at humanity and themselves, this pattern will continue, and all you've done is made yourself sorry for getting involved. Yeah. That's fair. Yeah. Dang. This one isn't cut and dry. They're all rough. Yeah. Except for the kid. The kid sounds great. Yeah. Yeah. I hope the kid's doing alright. Year old's alright. The kid's a biter. I'm hoping he Dang it. Van, why'd you have to ruin this for me? Sorry. They're bite excited about this kiddo. I thought they were just doing right. Maybe the kids yo have is biting. Why don't you calm down? Everybody's got one. He bit a cat. 2nd Floor. Wow. Bit a cat on the 2nd Floor. Okay. Anybody else wanna throw in? Otherwise, we're doing secular's advice. Kassen? I don't think I have any fatherly advice Yeah. From this end. I'm very interested to hear what secular has to say to this one. Okay. The question was, what do you think? I love what they'd like that. And the answer is, face it, your daughter's boyfriend is an overgrown child. Count your blessings that she isn't married to him. Oh, yeah. That's the big hang up.

Yeah. Be happy that she's just giving him free sex. Right. That's great. Seems like a weird thing to hold on to They share bills and responsibilities, but good thing they're not married. Good thing they're not married because then it would be a little bit more awkward of a tax situation for when they had to cut off this non marriage just legal paperwork. What's wrong with you, secular? Someone has to be an adult, and I'm voting for you to fill that role by taking the first step. Hold your nose and apologize to Harry, if only for your daughter's sake. Yeah. Actually, that's probably the best advice. Make an apology you don't mean. We'll see how long that treaty lasts. This is the worst advice ever. Harry, I'm sorry. You sucked six years ago. Jeez. I would like, realistically, would you go to the guy and go,

I said something six years ago that seems to be really sticking with you. And whatever it is that I said at the time, even if I meant it, one, if I lost my temper, I apologize for that. It wasn't anything that should actually still be hanging around six years. So I apologize. Sure. And then whatever. I also think it's it's perfectly fine. And as long as we're being honest with each other, I like, you're you you can have an opinion if you want to. It's the you risk the relationships. It's up to you whether you think, like, it's gonna be effective or whether you think they're of consequence to go to say these things or not. So I'm not saying you actually can't say a hard thing if you want to. I'm just saying like whatever. If this is the barrier to the conversation, it costs you almost nothing. Yeah. Right. And if it if it's true, then do it. If it's not true, then don't do it.

Yeah. For the record though, I am gonna remember several insults that Mike has delivered to me in six years. So No. What'll happen is they'll eventually pile on so much that you just lose track of emotion. I've got them written down. Kazen, as someone who was insulted by Mike much further than six years ago, just throw the papers away. That's the I didn't really write them down. That's I I know. I just I spent the first five years of this show them telling me my shirts look like curtains. Okay. Dan, your shirts did look like curtains. Those were insults. They were insults, and then you started showing up in black sweatshirts, and it all got fixed. Listen to me, boys. Insults turn around in the light of day to be very true, and you're like, these are just truths that were being told by the saved in his phone up until recently as Fart in the Wind.

That was my contact name in his phone, was Fart in the Wind. He also made me so mad one time, I legitimately almost threw a table at him. Yeah. I can understand. I'm a little scared to know what my name is. I would hope it's just my name. I just started leaving the c off your name in my phone. He did he did call me asson. Yeah. But, yeah, he I played it off as a autocorrect pro. He yeah. There was a quick Kassin afterward, but, no, it's it's usually just assin. Okay. Ready? Here's Hold on. Hold on. Just for clarification. Within the last eighteen months, Dan has come into this show with a pair of pants that had peppers on it. You got pepper pants?

Hey. That's that's very grandpa. Gonna learn no lessons, Dan. Which ones? You showed up with pepper pant pajama pants? Or it was something of the which reminds line cook at a Chi Chi's, you have no right to have peppers on your I don't know what you're talking about. That's what I'd say too, Dan. Okay. I might have mistaken them for some but they were first of all, they were certainly some sort of leisure pants. They were loud. Yeah. And if you'd put a billfold in them, they would have fallen to his knees. Dude, I'm hey, guys. What's a nosy pepper do? Gets jalapeno business. Jalapeno business.

Carrot tops. I'm just saying, Dan, like, you know it when you buy this loud clothing. I've never wore it loud. Yeah. Yeah. Know. Do you like that? Casson's never met a clothing in earth tones. Hold on a minute. I also remember probably was it two or three years? Maybe it was two years ago. Dan, you were at some sort of convention, and you intentionally purchased some sort of loud shirt Yeah. Because it was driving conversation. It's true. You have one week. I was in Atlanta. I had more conversations.

Okay then. I don't wanna hear any this business. Yeah. Curtains, couches, loud and wide. I'll also never forget the secular of Solomon where Dan gave a country of origin, Dan boldly goes forward and goes, secular. Epcot Center.

It's got them all. We're like, wrong. Dan, come on. Hey. This justification makes way more sense to me on the second time around, and I think Dan should be awarded points. So Alright. Mike, give me Okay. Makes me You can take him out of my pool. Okay. This this one isn't funny like I was hoping. Ready? Oh, no. They're not from the path. Okay. Skip it. Should parents be allowed to send birthday invitations to school if only select students are the recipients of the invitation? I'm the parent. Oh, sorry. We said this wasn't funny. Yeah. This is where the heart tugger comes Okay. Sorry. I'm the parent of a very special needs pre K child. Oh, no. Daily, I feel the heartache of her challenges and her desire for connection with others. On the parent Facebook group, someone recently posted about their daughter's birthday. It said those who received an invite should text the cell phone number listed for a change of plans. We never received an invite. Mhmm. We were were we the only ones excluded? If I'm honest, my emotions may be particularly fragile when it comes to my daughter and inclusion. They are. I do think people should be able to invite only their friends. However, it seems to me that the discretion on the part of the parent who is hosting would be more polite and kind. Parents should make a point to know their child's friend's parents' contact information. Do you have an opinion?

So the so the the real crux of the thing from this person's perspective isn't that you could invite individuals. You don't have to invite everybody. It's really the Facebook post that had to draw attention to these invitations that then expose the fact that not everyone was invited. That her special needs child wasn't invited. Yeah. Yeah. The the kid didn't read it. The kid's in the same situation regardless. Yeah? Right. Exactly. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Agreed. This is this is a this is an emotion that you're feeling in this. And understandably, like, won't deny that. Like, it's understandable that you're feeling this thing, especially in in the space where you are very very cognizant cognizant of the kind of things that your daughter you hope for her to get, but she's not. Totally makes sense. You can feel the feelings without

pushing further. Like, you can go, oh, man. This kinda stinks. I really wish Delilah was, you know, invited. I really wish she had this, but you don't need to go any further and then make everyone change the way that they did that on the Facebook group. Yeah. That stinks for you undoubtedly, but, like Yeah. But, like, the the parent sponsoring the party should have contacted the people she invited, not publicly said, hey, everyone. Oh, undoubtedly. Like, they could have been invited. Hold on. That's true of everything on Facebook. Yeah. Right. Exactly. Literally should have just told the people that care. Right? You know what I'm saying? If I might stop posting I just can't imagine doing that. That's why I've been off to Facebook for years. Changed my ways, I'll unblock you. Hey, everybody. I bought a trip to Hawaii too. Could you give me a call? Hey, everybody. I know I'm having that super sweet bowling party next Friday.

If you got the invite, reply to this message. We changed the time. Everyone who didn't need not comment. Yeah. Like, it it is, like maybe it's just a quick lesson to, like, teach your kids how to how to be look outwards. Right? Even when things are about you. Right? So, like, obviously, the party's about you, but, like, you know full well what it feels like to not get invited to a thing excluded. So, like, like, if you're smart about it, like, you can get your kids to to make a game out of it. You're like, look. We don't wanna hurt people's feelings, but, like, the most convenient time to run into all your friends is at the school. So, like, hand them out, but do it on the sly. Be like, hey. This is an invitation to my party. Daughters to do. Yeah. Put it in your backpack, but please don't tell anybody. See it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And everyone's gotten an invite to a party from Danielle. That makes sense. You went to a different school. Yeah. Oh, that's true. Yeah. Good point. She's really sly about that.

Yeah. It's not too early to teach your kids to to to have some empathy for people around you. And, like, I don't think you should guilt them into inviting somebody that they they don't necessarily want there. People have have got to be able to have a a respite, and usually it's their home, and they do it's okay to maintain some some boundaries in there. Right? Like, I don't have to invite people I don't like or who don't like me just to keep up with the parents. So And and I wanna clarify that we do have a picture with Buva at my daughter's sister. Thinking that, actually. I thought to myself, I was like, I think I was invited to some of parties, actually. Remember. Fact. Okay. Good. Let's just Yeah. I was really a joke, but it ended up Sorry for all you guys who didn't get invited. Ouch. Oh, my hand. How my appendix hurts. I feel so much better about myself now. Alright. You know, I guess the other consideration is that, like so it lacked tact

for sure. Sure. I think the Facebook post lacked some tact. Yeah. I also don't know if you're the world's manor police. Like Yeah. Because it so if they sent the invites to school and you weren't aware of this already, then the first thing worked. Right? Right. Yeah. And so it's Your kid didn't find out. It's really the change of plans at the last minute. Maybe it feels like you don't know how to get ahold of everybody quickly. You're not sure maybe your who you who the kid who your kid gave all the invitations to. Yeah. It may be actually they're like, I don't like this option, but it's the only one I have. I just like I mean, I guess if you see a pattern of things and feel like you gotta step in on it, I totally get that. I just don't know It's a weird hell to die on to be like, you should know the contact information of your child's friends. But this is, like, preschool age, though. Yeah. Right. Like, this is Of course, you would know that But I mean, maybe the most convenient way to do it is this Facebook group because there's, like, 12 kids in the pre k class. This is not this is not untrue. Right? Like Uh-huh. Do you sometimes you think the people have have more nuance and capabilities than they do. Yeah. But sometimes they don't own a flyswatter. They only own an elephant gun, and they shoot it for everything. Like, that is most of social media. Right? Like, instead of having a nuanced targeted approach with the sniper, you're in there blowing tanks everywhere and be like, hey, everybody. Here's all the things about me all the time. And so, like, some people just don't have the wit or or tact about them to actually know the difference in in the thing that you're saying. You know what I'm saying? I yeah. I just think it's important to not assume maliciousness.

Just just handle it with more tact than you think they've handled it after after this. Yes. I think there is malicious intent. Like, I'm glad what you've done is is write a letter to secular rather than, like, going on the on the tirade against the parents and making them all feel very uncomfortable in the situation. You probably did. Of the options that you had, one of the better ones, which is not to make a big stink in your social circle with the situation. I guess the only thing I would say is, like, a good a good thing to run by is, like, is the person that you're worried about being harmed, were they harmed? Sure. Yeah. Because because they case? No. Right. Were harmed. They just weren't. You you perceive that they could have been. Sure. But they weren't. Yep. And so I you know? And as a special needs parent, I feel like this is something you're gonna run into forever. Probably. Over and over and over and over again. Your child is gonna get passed up on opportunities, on social situations, and all this different stuff. If you go to war or allow yourself to have all the fire heaped on you every single time,

I I'm I'm so sorry for how your emotional battles are gonna go over the next fifteen years. Like, legitimately, like, I there has to be some level of resilience that you start to get here or you're gonna be buried emotionally forever. Because some of it is gonna be actual, and then some of it's gonna be perceived. Yeah. It's perceived, like, have to grow some thick skin in this. And I know that's not the advice that you're asking for here, but I certainly think it's understandable in this space because, like, the you have a special needs child. This is not gonna go away anywhere. Like, things are going to continue. That's the thing. Undoubtedly. Is there By administrations, by social situations For sure. By people in their life, there's gonna be times when they're old enough that you're not there to be any level of social buffer or emotional buffer at this that, like, you have to teach them a level of resilience here as you can, as you're capable of doing so. And I hope I hope for your sake that you're able to start being, like, water off a duck's back within some of this stuff. Because if by four, which I'm guessing is the age here, we're still in the space where it's like, my kid got passed up for for an invite to a a party. They don't know about it, but I do, and I'm broken.

Mhmm. I'm I'm so sorry. I can understand why that hurts, but I'm hoping for you that you can get to a level where this starts to get to a point where it goes, yep. This is par for the course, but I love my kid. And but that's like to Cass's point, though. Right? Like, it's it's best to try not to to to live with some hope in your life that it is not like this because here's the thing. It's like, you know all the reasons that your kid has special needs and the things they struggle with. The other four year old has no idea. They just know that that kid's different, and they're not very nice. And they don't know why they're not very nice. They don't know why they don't talk or why they don't look them in the eye or why they scream randomly. Like, they have no idea why all these things are true. And so, like, you can't take this heavy burden of knowing the reason that, like, you're heartbroken is because you're looking at a future, and you're going Sure. This will be a lifetime worth of struggle. Sure. But, like, at four years old, you can't be holding these four year olds accountable. Like, the kid in their estimation is not nice to them and is not friendly, and they can't quite figure out how to communicate right or whatever the thing is that's blocking it. And so, like, I think you have to be really careful in in, like, you have to be the protector of your kid, but you also have to be the level setter of what you can expect out of the rest of humanity based on the information they have. Mhmm. Like, they don't know like, them kids have no idea that the kid has special needs. They just know that it's different. Yeah. It's not working right. You know what I'm saying? Alright. Here we go. Secular's advice was, I'm with you a 100%. Speaking for myself as an adult who was once a child who was excluded.

For many reasons, parents should make a point of having their friends parents' contact information. That information could be crucial in case of an emergency. Speaking as a child who was once excluded. Yeah. What a weird way to level set that. Yeah. Right. Like, that is just an odd stretch of empathy. Yeah. It's like, hey. I get where your special needs child is coming from, and I can totally understand where you're coming from as a parent because I too was once not invited to a party.

I'm not I'm secular. I'm I'm so not trying to to no. Yes. I am. I'm absolutely trying to liken your life experiences or or lighten your life experiences. That's ridiculous. Secular also didn't answer the question. No. Not at all. Just said, hey. It is a good idea to have contact information. You're right. They should have the code that they're gonna Yeah. You should know little Timmy's dad's number. Dude, I have I have there's some kids that, like, I only have their mom's number, and I didn't have their dad's number. And I won't call a single like, woman I don't know. You know what I'm saying? If I haven't met them very often, I will all I'll call a dad right out. I got zero problems with that. But, like, like, another woman that, like, I've maybe met once, I always have to find my wife. I'm like, well, you better call this gal. I'm not I I don't do that. Yeah. You know? And so then so people always the, like, the kids will be like, like, here, let me give you my mom's number. I'm like, what's your dad's number? Well, I I I don't know. He's he works a lot. I go, I don't give a rip whether he works or not or not. He's the guy I'm calling. So, like, give me your dad's number. What's what's your daddy's number? And then I'll call the dad, and I'm like, hey. You were supposed to come pick up this kid. They're like, I didn't know my kid was there. I go, not my problem. Your kid's still here, though. Somebody needs to come get him. Well, you should call his mom. I go, you should call his mom. I'm calling you.

Oh, Mike, you're fun. You're real fun in social situations. Did you know that has anyone ever told you that? I didn't think so. I didn't think anyone's ever complimented you on your social ability. You could use some tact. Yeah. You should see him in a Panera Bread. It's the funniest thing you'll ever see in your entire life. I've almost had to leave a Panera Bread because I almost wet myself laughing. You're listening. Ability to handle social cues at all. You're listening live for the Path. I thank you for hanging around with us on this very fine evening or whatever time of day you're enjoying the program. Big thanks to Kassen for joining us this tonight. Thanks for coming in, man. We appreciate it. Door's always open. And we're gonna turn this thing over to you. If you got any feedback, hit us up on the Life of the Path complaint line. (515) 517-0085. Call or text. We'd love to hear from you. And in the meantime, God you should be faithful to meet. God will handle the ends. You've been listening to Live From The Path.

You build your ivory towers, sit on gilded thrones, but the Lord sees all. Even hearts of stone, woe to those at ease who sing out of songs. Your palaces crumble, you've been wicked