Dear LFTP: the 80-year-old father

• Should the listener confront their 80-year-old father about his unkempt appearance?

Dear LFTP letter: a listener's 80-year-old father — once a businessman with many contacts — is now unkempt, unshaven, sagging pants, fingernails full of dirt; the writer dreads the funeral-home presentation and fears confronting him. The hosts' answer: the funeral home will clean him up ('those guys have seen everything'); do mention it gently, since it may signal coordination trouble or depression; and 'he's 80 years old — he doesn't care.' The Secular answer is read: check whether he is depressed or becoming demented, encourage a senior group, and rest assured the funeral director handles presentation as standard procedure.