Colloquialisms, sleep habits, and the fan saga

• What are three Christian teachings that Jesus didn't teach?

An article on 'three Christian teachings that Jesus didn't teach' (Ben Franklin's 'God helps those who help themselves'; 'teach a man to fish') leads into folk-etymology riffs — 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps' as an 1800s physics impossibility, and a 'hangover' as paying to sleep draped over a rope. A hammock-rental business idea, Japanese nap pods, and sleeping-habit confessions follow (sound machines, covered device lights, Boova's giant travel fan). The Bob Eisenlauer complaint line (515) 517-0085 is plugged for listener sleep habits.