Iron Sharpens Iron: is it appropriate to expect a tour of your childhood home?
- Is it appropriate to visit a house you grew up in years ago and expect to be treated to a tour?
A listener letter asks whether one should expect current owners to grant a tour of a childhood home. Answer: no obligation — kindness is optional, not owed. Personal stories follow: an 85-year-old mother whose father built the house was let in; a foreclosed-house buyer regretted letting the previous owners in (they trashed his paint choices and revealed terrible wiring). Secular's advice: don't expect anything from strangers — it suggests entitlement — and write ahead with a polite note instead.
More on Hospitality
-
Dear LFTP: the single man and the holiday cliques
- Would it be wrong for the lonely single man to start declining holiday invitations?
The first Dear LFTP letter: a single man, happy with his life and plenty of friends and family, dreads the holidays — at Thanksgiving and Christmas gatherings of 15 to 25 people,…
From No. 603 · Found Out
-
Dear LFTP: the inclusive dinner and the autistic boy
- How can I stay inclusive when a new family's severely autistic child disrupts my neighborhood movie night?
Mike reads the first Dear LFTP letter: a single woman hosts monthly inclusive neighborhood dinners and movie nights (kids, dogs, a ramp for an elderly neighbor), but a new…
From No. 600 · Rage The Elephant
-
Dear LFTP #2: friends who always bring extra people
- How do we stop friends from inviting extra people to our gatherings?
Mike reads the second letter: dear friends who socialize a lot keep inviting extra people to gatherings at the listener's lake house — including, once, a passed-out stranger ('my coyote fell asleep on the couch').
-
Dear LFTP: the $600 lawnmower and buying them a mower
- My nephew's wife took my $600, lied about it, and is avoiding me. Should I say something or let it go?
Mike reads a letter from someone who gave a nephew's wife $600 for a self-propelled lawnmower; she spent it, never bought the mower, and now avoids them.
From No. 587 · Coffee After Sunday