Dear LFTP: the laid-off IT worker and the handyman dream
- I am 58, laid off from IT, and want to start a handyman business, but my wife insists I find another IT job for the benefits and will not go full-time herself. How do I raise this without an argument?
A host reads a Dear LFTP letter from a 58-year-old IT professional laid off a year ago: he can't find IT work, wants to start a handyman business, but his wife insists he find another IT job for the benefits and refuses to go full-time herself — he calls her selfish and asks how to raise it without an argument. The hosts advise there is no argument-free way (he already knows where she stands), he may be misreading her motives, and his only course is to keep talking until they find an option both agree on. Then the 'Secular' persona's answer is read: expect an argument and be prepared; ageism in IT hiring is real; a good handyman is hard to find.
More on Marriage
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Dear LFTP: the spontaneous husband and the 7 p.m. date
- My spontaneous husband starts a project at 5 p.m., fails to cancel our 7 p.m. date, and shows up late in work clothes. Please advise.
Mike reads the second letter: a planner wife of two years whose spontaneous husband started a household project at 5 p.m., agreed to cancel their 7 p.m. date, never told the other couple, then showed up 45 minutes late in work clothes.
From No. 601 · Humble Faithful Idiot
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Dear LFTP: the basement musician whose wife never asks him to play
- Am I asking too much to expect my wife to ask me to play, or should I just let it go and stop writing songs?
Mike reads a letter from a married-31-years basement musician and songwriter whose non-musical wife has never once asked him to play — he wonders if he's asking too much or should stop writing.
From No. 597 · Maybe A Word From God
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Dear LFTP: the reluctant grandmother
- Am I wrong to prefer not to drive an hour and a half to visit my husband's grandbabies?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a 56-year-old married twelve years who doesn't want to drive an hour and a half to visit her husband's grandbabies — she's 'not into babies or children' — and can't understand why he won't stop asking.
From No. 596 · Mr. Prayer Closet
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Dear LFTP: the incarcerated husband
- My husband is serving a life sentence and I have met someone new — what should I do?
- How would you counsel the incarcerated husband who wants to divorce his wife to free her from the marriage?
Mike reads a heavier letter: the writer's husband is serving a life sentence with the possibility of parole, having turned himself in a year and a half ago for a crime from…
From No. 596 · Mr. Prayer Closet