Dear LFTP: the military husband in Hawaii
- How should I respond to my wife refusing household work while keeping her daycare income as spending money?
- How do you deal with discouragement in marriage when you earnestly seek God but your partner does not?
- Do men wrongly treat the work week as the end of all household responsibility?
The reader reads the final, heavy letter: a married father of two in the military, working twelve-hour days in Hawaii, whose wife runs a mildly successful daycare (the money is 'her spending money'), doesn't cook or clean ('I am not a housemaid'), ignores complaints, plays the victim, and reverts after counseling. The hosts frame it as covenant: you can't control another person, marriage is submission and service not control; households have joint responsibility ('you're not a housemaid either'); keep counseling without stopping; 'serve your spouse' daily. The 'Secular' answer says 'consult a lawyer' — the hosts are stunned it ignored the kids entirely. A Christian marriage has Christ as mediator and an objective standard (sacrifice as Christ sacrificed); outside that framework it's just 'what do I feel?'
More on Marriage
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Dear LFTP: the spontaneous husband and the 7 p.m. date
- My spontaneous husband starts a project at 5 p.m., fails to cancel our 7 p.m. date, and shows up late in work clothes. Please advise.
Mike reads the second letter: a planner wife of two years whose spontaneous husband started a household project at 5 p.m., agreed to cancel their 7 p.m. date, never told the other couple, then showed up 45 minutes late in work clothes.
From No. 601 · Humble Faithful Idiot
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Dear LFTP: the basement musician whose wife never asks him to play
- Am I asking too much to expect my wife to ask me to play, or should I just let it go and stop writing songs?
Mike reads a letter from a married-31-years basement musician and songwriter whose non-musical wife has never once asked him to play — he wonders if he's asking too much or should stop writing.
From No. 597 · Maybe A Word From God
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Dear LFTP: the reluctant grandmother
- Am I wrong to prefer not to drive an hour and a half to visit my husband's grandbabies?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a 56-year-old married twelve years who doesn't want to drive an hour and a half to visit her husband's grandbabies — she's 'not into babies or children' — and can't understand why he won't stop asking.
From No. 596 · Mr. Prayer Closet
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Dear LFTP: the incarcerated husband
- My husband is serving a life sentence and I have met someone new — what should I do?
- How would you counsel the incarcerated husband who wants to divorce his wife to free her from the marriage?
Mike reads a heavier letter: the writer's husband is serving a life sentence with the possibility of parole, having turned himself in a year and a half ago for a crime from…
From No. 596 · Mr. Prayer Closet