Dear LFTP: the inheritance and the controlling husband
- Should a mother leave an inheritance to a daughter whose controlling husband will control it?
The second letter comes from a mother whose daughter married a controlling, rude husband; she wonders whether to leave a sizable inheritance knowing he will control it. Vanek declines to throw out an answer without knowing the root, offering his line about scratching the itch in the right spot — which the room adopts. The hosts reframe the question: what does the money facilitate, and will it produce blessing? They suggest alternative structures and, above all, local community and a pastor rather than a letter. The Secular answer suggests a trust paying monthly and leaving the remainder to a chosen cause.
More on Community
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Do accountability partners actually work?
- Do accountability partners actually do anything?
Mike raises his accountability-partners question: the standard dude-circle advice to get a buddy to hold you accountable for Bible reading, porn, church attendance, and drinking.
From No. 598 · Emphasis | Accountability, Worship and Praying with Strangers
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Dear LFTP 2: the neighbors' piling newspapers
- Dear LFTP: at what point can we pick up our out-of-town neighbors' piling newspapers and recycle them?
Mike reads the second letter: new neighbors have been out of town for weeks and their newspapers are piling up — at what point may the writer recycle them?
From No. 595 · Trust But Verify
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Local pastors, mutual refinement, and the 'pods' joke
- What word comes after "community"?
The best pastor for you is the person in your life who can look you in the eyeballs; walk into every room expecting the other person might refine you — that only works locally.
From No. 590 · Theodore Franco
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Dear LFTP: Martha, John, and Jerry
- How should a woman in love with her ex's brother tell friends, family, and his parents?
A host reads the first Dear LFTP letter: Martha dated John for two years, then he kept living with her six months after the breakup; John is an emotionally and verbally abusive alcoholic who burned every bridge.
From No. 584 · When Vanek Was Here | Cambodia Testimony, Church Mission, Josiah Queen