Dear LFTP 3: being asked for a job reference by a bad former coworker
- How should I respond when a former coworker I don't like asks me to be his job reference?
A listener asks how to handle a former coworker - a good worker who turned irritable and negative under stress - who wants her as a reference at her current workplace, when she is non-confrontational and doesn't want to work with him again. Advice: tell him upfront what you would say ('think twice before you put me down'), suggest he ask his manager instead, or decline by saying you're not comfortable assuming that responsibility. The hosts conclude the awkwardness reveals she was never fully honest in the relationship.
More on Honesty
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Dear LFTP: explaining an invisible disability
- How do I explain my invisible disability to friends who act like I'm making it up?
Mike reads a letter from a listener with polyneuropathy, seven back surgeries, and arthritis in every joint who lives in constant invisible pain and doesn't know how to explain it to friends who act like she's making it up.
From No. 585 · Split Ends | Interacting with other Denominations
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Dear LFTP: ending a friendship or ghosting the young couple
- Should I ghost an unwanted friendship or tell them honestly I want to end it?
A listener wants to end a relationship with a younger couple who guilt-tripped them into visits, now with toddlers she dislikes; her husband disagrees and wants to keep up the charade.
From No. 568 · Like Jesus
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Dear LFTP: the boyfriend's uncomfortably hard bed and couch
- How do I tell my boyfriend his expensive bed and couch are too uncomfortable to sleep on?
A host hands the advice segment to Mike ("Alright. Mike, let's give some advice") and a host reads the Dear LFTP letter: a woman in a tumultuous-but-currently-good relationship…
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Dear LFTP: the aggressively negative colleague
- Should I make excuses or be honest with a negative, aggressive friend?
Mike reads the third Dear LFTP letter: a listener reconnected with a former colleague who has become negative, aggressive, and angry — bashing family, colleagues, and service workers, and refusing to stop talking politics.
From No. 554 · The Simple Life