69 conversations
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Dear LFTP: the plate of food that froze out a grandmother
- My daughter-in-law froze me out over a plate of food — what should I do?
Mike reads a letter from a grandmother frozen out by her son and daughter-in-law Corinne after she offered to pack a take-home plate for Corinne's chemo-recovering stepmother; the…
From No. 583 · My Girl Likes to Holy All the Time | Public Prayer & Worship Culture
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Dear LFTP: drive-up grocery, lazy, or antisocial?
- Am I lazy and antisocial for using drive-up grocery pickup?
A listener's son-in-law calls her lazy and antisocial for using drive-up grocery pickup. The hosts defend her while joking that chunky guacamole from bad avocados is a real risk…
From No. 572 · Rippin’ Heaters
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Boova's social question: sale ethics, future hot dogs, and cologne
- Is it a schmuck move to buy up far more than average of a sale item?
Boova poses his social question: if an item is on sale and you buy far more than the average person, are you a schmuck?
From No. 519 · Folk Ain’t Happy
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Dear LFTP: the hair in the food letter
- Should the husband mention finding a hair in the food or let it pass?
A host reads a letter from a wife embarrassed that her husband loudly complains once or twice a month about finding a hair in her cooking.
From No. 432 · Participating in God’s Will and other sundry advice
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Dear LFTP: cousin wants a bite of everything at restaurants
- How do I stop my cousin from taking food off everyone's plate at restaurants?
A listener who is a healthcare worker writes that her cousin wants a bite of everyone's plate at restaurants and she doesn't know how to say no, especially with food safety concerns.
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Dear LFTP: relative demands all potluck dishes be dairy-free
- Is it selfish for a relative to require all 30 guests at her potluck to cook only dairy-free, cheese-free, butter-free, soy-free dishes?
A listener's relative hosts parties and requires all 30 guests to cook only dairy-free, cheese-free, butter-free, soy-free dishes though she is the only one on the diet.
From No. 324 · Guppies and Pumpkins
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Dear LFTP: who eats too fast or too slow
- My brother eats too slow and I eat too fast -- who's right?
A listener debates her brother over fast versus slow eating. The hosts land on eating at the pace of the table; a guest tells of a Middle East wedding where guests communally ate 13 goats on a bed of rice in five minutes; the 'secular' advice says both are right.
From No. 161 · Persecution and Millennials
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The casserole rulebook
- Is it okay to accept a casserole from a woman you have no romantic interest in?
A follow-up question - is it okay to accept a casserole from a woman you have no romantic interest in? - becomes an extended comedy bit.
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Restaurant kitchens, beard nets, and the BM gag
The hair discussion escalates into gross-out territory: beard nets are 'merely for show,' a host guesses he has eaten eighty-five pounds of beard hair in his life, and they joke that complaining about a restaurant hair earns you food made 'in Hakaluca.'
From No. 432 · Participating in God’s Will and other sundry advice
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Article: the one thing keeping your sin on life support
- What is the one thing keeping your sin on life support?
Ben walks through an article on persistent sin, starting from a US News & World Report claim that two thirds of Americans admit to some form of addiction.
From No. 535 · Solo Contendere
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Dan: Overeaters Anonymous and the food battle
Dan says he went to a few Overeaters Anonymous meetings earlier in the year at a friend's prompting and realized he genuinely has an addiction to food.
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Cheeseburger road talk
- Will mainline Protestantism decline to zero in 23 Easters, and what is the way back?
Lighthearted food talk: the best cheeseburger by city — a $2.50 'deluxe' cheeseburger across from Madison Square Garden that 'tastes like absolute poop', In-N-Out in San Antonio as a tour stop, and Zombie Burger in Des Moines.
From No. 345 · Grammys and Cheeseburgers
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The Yoav in your life
- Is there a 'Yoav' in your life — something harmful you keep because it still serves you?
Ben's framing question — Joab served David even while harming him; what do you keep because it still serves you? — draws confessions from the whole room.
From No. 574 · Starring Ted Danson as Joab
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Cereal and gross-food banter
- Would you eat a stranger's half-eaten bowl of your favorite cereal?
A long comedy riff sparked by eating noises: whether one could eat someone else's half-eaten bowl of cereal (peanut butter Captain Crunch gets a pass from one host), wet bread in…
From No. 113 · September 3 2012
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Snack food confessions
- Is there a food you used to love that you no longer enjoy?
A long chat-driven riff on foods: full-strength cheese puffs from Casey's, milk toast as Depression-era survival food, corn nuts effectively banned by marriage, Burger King French toast sticks, gas-station NeMo's cakes, and Chuck Wagons.
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Missionaries, Global Outreach, and Hamburger America
The story's aftermath: Boova's wife was a missionary in Madagascar, a Global Outreach misunderstanding gets untangled, and the hamburger thread resolves with George Motz's book Hamburger America and Latham's Hamburger Inn.
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Boova's "I used to be fatter" T-shirt and the F.A.T. shirt rant
Boova recounts sweating through his shirt while playing Pokemon GO with his nephew and wishes for a shirt reading "I used to be fatter."
From No. 534 · The Antagonistic Bison
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Make-yourself-sick stories: the carton, the burrito challenge, the smoking punishment
The room trades stories of trying to get sick of a habit: Mike and his band's lead singer smoking a carton in hours, Boova's eight-pound burrito challenge with his dad (who died…
From No. 530 · Know Self Control
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Cold-open comedy: potatoes and handshake etiquette
An extended cold-open comedy run: one host confesses he dislikes twice-baked and scalloped potatoes ('like eating a limp handshake'), which spirals into handshake philosophy —…
From No. 524 · Handshakes and Wrongness
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New Year self-control confessions
Comedy round on failed resolutions: Nathaniel confesses to doubling down on gas-station convenience food instead of quitting it, surrenders his wallet to his wife, and deletes Apple Pay from his phone.
From No. 518 · Jesus Blocked the Jukebox
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HuHot with the band
The hosts and band swap stories about eating at the HuHot restaurant before the show — how many plates they put down, the ultra-spicy 'Con's Revenge' sauce, and salad-eating as self-deception — plus a sidebar about a local sandwich shop run by Chris Romero.
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Biblical Protein teaser and the diciest foods ever eaten
Nathaniel received the Biblical Protein jar of locusts and honey, ordered weeks earlier when the protein bars were sold out, setting up a live taste test later in the show.
From No. 467 · We Ate The Locusts
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Live Biblical Protein locust-and-honey taste test
The locust taste test happens on-air: the dried locusts smell like vitamins and fish food. Dan abstains, saying he is fasting locusts.
From No. 467 · We Ate The Locusts
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'Biblical Protein': Israeli company's commercial locust farm comedy read-through
A host reads a Christian Post story about an Israeli company that launched 'Biblical Protein,' described as the first commercial locust farm in the world, on the banks of the Jordan River — 'Israeli company creates snack food with John the Baptist in mind.'
From No. 464 · Buying International Locusts