Dear LFTP: should I send my ex a birthday card after the breakup?
- Should I send my ex a birthday card and gift even though she asked for no contact?
A host reads a Dear LFTP letter: after a three-year relationship ended over distance, the writer's ex asked for no contact to let things heal, but her birthday is coming and he wonders whether sending a card and gift is appropriate. The hosts are unanimous — leave her alone; her silence request is itself the gift she asked for, illustrated by a seventh-grade Nike-vs-Adidas socks story about giving people what they actually want. The read-aloud 'secular answer' disagrees and says send the card; one host admits he agrees with the secular take.
More on Boundaries
-
Dear LFTP: the mother-in-law moved in
- My mother-in-law moved in seven months ago and it’s been difficult — how can we sort this out?
The last letter comes from a wife whose mother-in-law moved in seven months ago with no boundaries, rising bills, unpaid prescriptions, and open disrespect.
From No. 604 · Rearview Mirror
-
Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
-
Dear LFTP: the senior-living handshake letter, and the close
- How can a senior-living resident politely decline the dining-room manager's handshakes?
Mike reads the second Dear LFTP letter: a senior-living resident whose dining-room manager (Manny) shakes hands at residents' tables, and who dodges with wet or greasy hands — how to decline politely?
-
Dear LFTP: the fiance who games until 5AM
- What should the letter-writer do about her fiance's all-night gaming habit?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman engaged five years to Dustin, who games from 10PM to 5AM, skips chores, and gives her no attention; talking has not helped since 'he grew up gaming.'
From No. 598 · Emphasis | Accountability, Worship and Praying with Strangers