Dear LFTP: 'Big boys walk' — grandma and the disabled grandson
- How do I handle my mom shaming my disabled son with 'big boys walk'?
A mother of a five-year-old with a rare spinal cord injury (crawls, uses a wheelchair) says her own mother fixates on his disability during visits, telling him 'big boys walk, they don't crawl,' leaving him tearfully asking if he can still be a big boy. The hosts say confront her directly and firmly — she is hurting the child — give her one honest chance to change, teach the boy tools (humor, boundaries) for people who won't understand, and the Secular answer adds that she must choose: stop the shaming or lose access. Includes a digression where a host describes a split-second false memory of his own daughter's death.
More on Boundaries
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Dear LFTP: the mother-in-law moved in
- My mother-in-law moved in seven months ago and it’s been difficult — how can we sort this out?
The last letter comes from a wife whose mother-in-law moved in seven months ago with no boundaries, rising bills, unpaid prescriptions, and open disrespect.
From No. 604 · Rearview Mirror
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Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
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Dear LFTP: the senior-living handshake letter, and the close
- How can a senior-living resident politely decline the dining-room manager's handshakes?
Mike reads the second Dear LFTP letter: a senior-living resident whose dining-room manager (Manny) shakes hands at residents' tables, and who dodges with wet or greasy hands — how to decline politely?
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Dear LFTP: the fiance who games until 5AM
- What should the letter-writer do about her fiance's all-night gaming habit?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman engaged five years to Dustin, who games from 10PM to 5AM, skips chores, and gives her no attention; talking has not helped since 'he grew up gaming.'
From No. 598 · Emphasis | Accountability, Worship and Praying with Strangers