Dr. Dan: the couple fighting in the group
- When a couple argues in front of you in a group, do you step in or stay out?
A 'Dr. Dan' advice scenario is posed: a married couple, Jacob and Rachel, bicker in a small group over her father's endless demands for free labor and his unwashed dinner dishes. The hosts' unanimous counsel is to stay out of it — a couple having an off week will reconcile and you will be remembered as the meddler; one compares intervening to taking a man's 'man card,' and Dan is dubbed 'the new Laban' for his plans to put future sons-in-law to work. They back it biblically, noting the consistent scriptural response to complainers before Jesus is rebuke, from the disciples shooing children away to Peter being corrected; one host says that in his job, couples bringing him petty spats is the hardest part: 'I don't care who washes the dishes in your house.'
More on Boundaries
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Dear LFTP: the mother-in-law moved in
- My mother-in-law moved in seven months ago and it’s been difficult — how can we sort this out?
The last letter comes from a wife whose mother-in-law moved in seven months ago with no boundaries, rising bills, unpaid prescriptions, and open disrespect.
From No. 604 · Rearview Mirror
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Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
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Dear LFTP: the senior-living handshake letter, and the close
- How can a senior-living resident politely decline the dining-room manager's handshakes?
Mike reads the second Dear LFTP letter: a senior-living resident whose dining-room manager (Manny) shakes hands at residents' tables, and who dodges with wet or greasy hands — how to decline politely?
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Dear LFTP: the fiance who games until 5AM
- What should the letter-writer do about her fiance's all-night gaming habit?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman engaged five years to Dustin, who games from 10PM to 5AM, skips chores, and gives her no attention; talking has not helped since 'he grew up gaming.'
From No. 598 · Emphasis | Accountability, Worship and Praying with Strangers