Dear LFTP: trimming the holiday party guest list
- How do we politely exclude a couple from our annual formal holiday party?
A listener writes that she and her husband throw a formal annual holiday party, want to cut a couple that has 'fallen out of favor' and tends to spout off when offended, and feels uneasy about excluding them. The hosts roleplay a frank conversation (one host, addressed as Mike, playing the offending couple), then land on the principle that loving someone does not equal accepting their bad behavior — address the behavior directly and honestly rather than using the party as the 'bat'. Ted weighs in that he would rather have them come and address issues in the moment than disinvite on the sly. The hosts reject the 'Secular' answer's no-excuses brusqueness as jerky and insist on owning the decision honestly.
More on Boundaries
-
Dear LFTP: the mother-in-law moved in
- My mother-in-law moved in seven months ago and it’s been difficult — how can we sort this out?
The last letter comes from a wife whose mother-in-law moved in seven months ago with no boundaries, rising bills, unpaid prescriptions, and open disrespect.
From No. 604 · Rearview Mirror
-
Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
-
Dear LFTP: the senior-living handshake letter, and the close
- How can a senior-living resident politely decline the dining-room manager's handshakes?
Mike reads the second Dear LFTP letter: a senior-living resident whose dining-room manager (Manny) shakes hands at residents' tables, and who dodges with wet or greasy hands — how to decline politely?
-
Dear LFTP: the fiance who games until 5AM
- What should the letter-writer do about her fiance's all-night gaming habit?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman engaged five years to Dustin, who games from 10PM to 5AM, skips chores, and gives her no attention; talking has not helped since 'he grew up gaming.'
From No. 598 · Emphasis | Accountability, Worship and Praying with Strangers