Dear LFTP: the husband's affair and the work of forgiveness
- I can't get over my husband's affair — what went wrong and should I stay?
Boova reads a letter from a 60-year-old woman whose husband of two and a half years had a two-month affair; counseling didn't help, and she keeps bringing the affair up while feeling stuck. The hosts counsel that the cheating was entirely his responsibility — nothing she did caused it — and that she cannot rebuild while wielding it as leverage; biblical forgiveness is radically about relieving the pain of the one who caused it, and guilt is God's realm, not a tool for spouses. Dan, asked for his thoughts on-air, adds that forgiveness is key, notes she biblically has the option to leave, and encourages real reconciliation work. The Secular answer — 'you are not a failure, your husband is' plus therapy — is read, and the hosts find it hopeless, with no hope in it.
More on Forgiveness
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Dear LFTP: the $4,200 loan that never came back
- How do I get past the sadness over the $4,200 loan my friend never repaid — do I just let it go?
The final Dear LFTP letter: a year ago a supposed friend asked to borrow money — her husband had left the country to renew his visa, her car was repossessed, she had no way to get to work.
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: the stolen college fund and telling the 90-year-olds
- Should I tell my 90-year-old parents that their grandson stole my granddaughter's college fund?
Ben hands to Mike, who reads a grandmother's letter: her son helped himself to the college money the great-grandparents set aside for her granddaughter; she fears telling her parents, in their nineties, could shock them into a stroke.
From No. 586 · Nothing Personal
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Dear LFTP: forty years of a cheating wife and a temptation
- Would it be wrong to rekindle an old friendship for intimacy when my wife has cheated for forty years?
A man approaching his fortieth anniversary writes that his wife has always been a serial cheater, a secret he kept to protect the children's view of her; with retirement and a sexless marriage he asks whether rekindling things with old female friends would be wrong.
From No. 581 · Silly Rabbit | Christianity, Culture, and Navigating Social Expectations
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Dear LFTP: the stalker ex-girlfriend
- How do I get my stalker ex-girlfriend to leave me alone?
Mike reads a letter from a man whose ex-girlfriend keeps trying to get him back, even stalking him, after he blocked her number.