Dear LFTP: should I attend my murdered niece's funeral?
- Should I attend my murdered niece's funeral after thirty years of family estrangement?
Mike reads a letter from a woman estranged from her brother's family for thirty years whose niece was murdered by her husband in a murder-suicide. She was never contacted and asks whether to attend the funeral. Dan's advice, endorsed by all, is to go: sit in the back, don't make it about the past, grieve quietly, and leave. The Secular answer adds that funerals are for the living, and privately if her presence would disrupt.
Clips from this
-
Go to the funeral, hide out in the back
Hear the full conversation →
More on Family
-
Dear LFTP: the mother-in-law moved in
- My mother-in-law moved in seven months ago and it’s been difficult — how can we sort this out?
The last letter comes from a wife whose mother-in-law moved in seven months ago with no boundaries, rising bills, unpaid prescriptions, and open disrespect.
From No. 604 · Rearview Mirror
-
Dear LFTP: the single man and the holiday cliques
- Would it be wrong for the lonely single man to start declining holiday invitations?
The first Dear LFTP letter: a single man, happy with his life and plenty of friends and family, dreads the holidays — at Thanksgiving and Christmas gatherings of 15 to 25 people,…
From No. 603 · Found Out
-
Dear LFTP: the grandma, 'Libby,' and the weight comment
- Was I wrong to mention my concern about Libby's weight?
Mike reads the letter: she moved 2,000 miles to be near her daughter's family; granddaughter 'Libby' was diagnosed with a medical condition and put on weight.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
-
Dear LFTP: the Mimi letter ('Call Me Hoopi')
- Is it wrong for a grandmother to be upset when her grandson's other grandmother claims the same nickname?
Mike reads the Dear LFTP letter: a grandmother whose two-year-old grandson calls her Mimi — but the other grandmother claimed Mimi for herself, and the daughter-in-law is annoyed and doesn't want 'mom mom' either.