Marriage & Dating
842 conversations across 16 years of the show. Try a few, or go by subject.
A few to try
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Dear LFTP: the fiance who games until 5AM
- What should the letter-writer do about her fiance's all-night gaming habit?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman engaged five years to Dustin, who games from 10PM to 5AM, skips chores, and gives her no attention; talking has not helped since 'he grew up gaming.'
From No. 598 · Emphasis | Accountability, Worship and Praying with Strangers
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Dear LFTP: the significant other who hijacks every religious discussion
- How do I get my significant other to stop hijacking religious discussions with hostility?
A woman writes in that her significant other, nice in every other respect, injects sarcasm and hostility into any religion or spirituality discussion and always ends with 'show me proof.'
From No. 454 · Read, Protect, and Complain About Your Husband
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Dear LFTP: the boyfriend still run by his ex-wife
- Am I wrong for not wanting to move forward in this relationship?
A listener writes that after moving two hours to live with her boyfriend John, who was divorced after a twenty-year marriage, she discovered his ex-wife Jessica still supplies his food, pays his bills, and talks with him daily.
From No. 436 · Failures
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Dear LFTP: boyfriend won't talk about his late father
- How can I get my boyfriend to open up about his late father?
Dear LFTP: a woman who moved in with her boyfriend of two years wants to know more about his late father but gets only terse 'dude answers.'
From No. 392 · More Generous Than Las Vegas
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Dear LFTP: the basement musician whose wife never asks him to play
- Am I asking too much to expect my wife to ask me to play, or should I just let it go and stop writing songs?
Mike reads a letter from a married-31-years basement musician and songwriter whose non-musical wife has never once asked him to play — he wonders if he's asking too much or should stop writing.
From No. 597 · Maybe A Word From God
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Dear LFTP 1: the fiance who impulse-bought Butch the dog
- Dear LFTP: my fiance impulse-bought a dog I did not want, and I resent him — what do I do?
Mike reads the first letter: a woman's fiance talked her into "just looking" at puppies, then put money on the counter over her objections — now they have Butch, an active breed neither has time for, and she resents him.
From No. 595 · Trust But Verify
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Dear LFTP: the verbally abusive 'man of your dreams'
- I love him but don't want to be in another abusive relationship — what should I do?
Mike reads a letter from a woman dating a man who calls her stupid, threatens to leave, and mirrors her abusive ex; the hosts are blunt — 'the man of your dreams does not call you…
From No. 583 · My Girl Likes to Holy All the Time | Public Prayer & Worship Culture
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Dear LFTP: wife mocks husband's bladder problem in public
- How should I respond when my wife mocks me and my bladder problem in public?
Mike reads a letter from a man married three years whose wife calls him vulgar names in public and makes his bladder-control problem into comedy.
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Dear LFTP: the stalker ex-girlfriend
- How do I get my stalker ex-girlfriend to leave me alone?
Mike reads a letter from a man whose ex-girlfriend keeps trying to get him back, even stalking him, after he blocked her number.
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Dear LFTP: dating and communication styles
- Is there a way for both partners to be happy when dealing with difficult conversations, and what can be done to make an avoidant partner more comfortable?
A host reads a second Dear LFTP letter: the writer has seen a man for six or seven months and dated him for three, but he avoids confrontation and communicates poorly while she is very communicative.
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Dear LFTP: the wedding-gift cash and the missing thank-you
- Tell me, was I wrong? (wedding-gift cash and the missing thank-you note)
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman who gave $300 cash at a destination wedding by handing the envelope to a bartender, then asked her friend six months later whether the couple received it, and wonders if she was wrong to ask.
From No. 575 · Heartfelt Heresy
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Dear LFTP: nephew Will's fast-moving rebound relationship
- Is there a tactful way to caution my nephew about his fast-moving new relationship after a painful divorce?
Ben tells Mike to give the advice; Mike reads a letter asking whether there's a tactful way to caution nephew Will — blindsided at his 25th anniversary dinner when his wife said…
From No. 567 · Talk Less
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Dear LFTP: excluded from the neighbors' dinner invitation
- Am I overreacting that my husband went to the neighbors' dinner without me?
A wife of 20+ years writes that neighbors invited her husband alone to dinner to thank him for yard work, he went without her, then talked about the evening with their son as if she weren't there.
From No. 567 · Talk Less
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Dear LFTP: the mumbling husband and long-marriage patience
- How can I get my mumbling husband to speak up so I can hear him?
A woman 'amicably' married 16 years is exasperated that her husband mumbles, talks from other rooms, and won't speak up despite her normal hearing test.
From No. 567 · Talk Less
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Dear LFTP: saying "I love you" too soon
- Is there a recommended timeframe for saying "I love you" in a new relationship?
Mike reads a letter from a man who reconnected with a woman he dated in the 1980s and told her he loved her too soon, then tried to walk it back to "caring and affection."
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Dear LFTP: the boyfriend with commitment issues
- How can I get my boyfriend to see that we are meant to be?
The host hands the Dear LFTP letters to Mike to read. The first letter is from a 29-year-old whose 36-year-old boyfriend of three years broke up with her two months ago, saying he…
From No. 554 · The Simple Life
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Dear LFTP: the age-gap relationship
- A late-20s woman is falling in love with a man 30-plus years older with incompatible life goals — can any good come of this, or is the end just heartbreak?
Dear LFTP letter: a woman in her late twenties is back with a man 30-plus years older after both failed to find partners closer to their ages; she wants children and a career…
From No. 326 · From Rib to Reality
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Dear LFTP: trusting a new partner after betrayal
- How do I move past my trust issues and give a new relationship a fair chance?
A second Dear LFTP letter: after years of untrustworthy family, friends, and ex-boyfriends, a woman fears she will destroy a promising new relationship.
From No. 312 · The Shack
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Dear LFTP: the married man who wants her as his side piece
- Should I block the married man who lied to me and wants me as his side piece, or stick around?
- When someone is cheating, do you tell the wife?
Ben reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman who fell for a coworker who claimed his ex was out of the picture, then learned via internet research that he is married and bought the house with his wife — and now he wants her as his side piece.
From No. 535 · Solo Contendere
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Dear LFTP: Sarah of Illinois on finding a lasting husband
- I am divorced and in my forties and still want a husband -- should I try online dating or reach out to another state?
A Dear LFTP letter from Sarah in Illinois: divorced, in her forties, still wanting a man in her life, alarmed that the men she meets prefer living alone, and asking whether to try…
From No. 528 · First Death, Then Resurrection
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Dear LFTP: the husband who only reads fan fiction
- How can I motivate my husband, who does nothing but read fan fiction all day?
A Dear LFTP letter: a wife of 35 years says her husband now does nothing but read internet fantasy fan fiction (16-18 hours on weekends, 10 hours weekdays), exercising no longer, no maintenance, no friends, and she cannot motivate him.
From No. 527 · Angels and Blessings
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Dear LFTP: the vegan-obsessed wife
- Should I stay or go? My wife has become obsessed with veganism and I can't have a conversation with her.
Dear LFTP letter one: a teacher writes that his wife beat diabetes through veganism but has since become purely vegan for animal rights, listening to vegan podcasts on earbuds all day and messaging vegan friends mid-conversation — 'should I stay or should I go?'
From No. 524 · Handshakes and Wrongness
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Dear LFTP: the drinking-establishment letter and rebuilding trust
- I exchanged numbers and agreed to lunch with a man I met while my husband was in class — how do I rebuild his trust?
A listener married four years (together ten) writes that while her husband was in a class, she went to a drinking establishment, met a man, exchanged numbers, and agreed to meet…
From No. 523 · This Is Not Love
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Dear LFTP: the difficult son and the defensive husband — 'evil advice'
- How should I handle my husband blaming our 26-year-old son for every problem in our marriage?
A Dear LFTP letter from a 30-year wife: her husband blames their 26-year-old son Isaac for every problem in the marriage, listens to no one, gets defensive, and she is caught in the middle.
From No. 522 · Biking with Billy Shatner
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Dear LFTP: the unaffectionate live-in boyfriend
- Should I leave my live-in boyfriend because he is not affectionate enough?
A mature divorced woman writes that she has lived with her boyfriend for two years; he is a good man but shows little affection and their sex life is “mechanical,” and she asks whether she should leave.
From No. 519 · Folk Ain’t Happy
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Dear LFTP: 36, single, and the laundry-facilities suitor
- Why do the men I meet want to kiss but not have a relationship?
A 36-year-old single listener went home with a man whose main selling points were his own place with laundry facilities and a people-free job; he went straight for kissing, then said he doesn't want a relationship.
From No. 508 · The Caduce
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Dear LFTP: the vacation-ruining, heavy-drinking husband
- Is it wrong to not want my husband on the next big trip?
A listener loves to travel but loathes traveling with her anxious, mean, heavy-drinking husband, who promised good behavior then 'flipped the mean switch' before the airport — and told the kids she left alone because she doesn't like them.
From No. 508 · The Caduce
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Dear LFTP: the retired wife's crossword obsession
- How do I handle my wife's crossword obsession since retirement?
Mike reads a thirty-year-marriage letter: since retiring, his wife does crossword puzzles all day, ignoring him, the kids, and family gatherings.
From No. 507 · What’s in a Name
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Dear LFTP: ghosted after eight months
- What do you think happened when he ghosted me after eight months of long-distance dating?
Mike reads a Dear LFTP letter from a woman ghosted after eight months of long-distance dating; the hosts theorize the 'great' final call was not great and another woman or a wife…
From No. 494 · 500-ish
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Dear LFTP: Ron versus Dan
- Should I leave my emotionally unavailable boyfriend Ron for my affectionate coworker Dan?
A Dear LFTP letter: a woman in a three-year relationship with Ron, who is emotionally unavailable and married to his job (two years to say 'I love you'), has begun an intimate relationship with her coworker Dan, who is openly affectionate.