Dear LFTP — the insecure sixteen-year-old
- I'm a deeply insecure 16-year-old with no real friends — please help.
A 16-year-old girl writes a long letter: she feels she is the most insecure person on the planet, believes her friends don't care about her, has distanced herself until she is socially deprived, was left uninvited to every 16 party, and traces much of the 'no one likes you' paranoia to her parents telling her that when she was young; her only real friends are online. The hosts answer earnestly: take social risks, ignore some rejection, stop hiding behind the computer screen, re-engage people since her withdrawal is a choice she can reverse, ground her identity in a relationship with Jesus rather than others' opinions, and recognize isolation distorts her perception of reality. They push back on the secular columnist's answer, which called the girl a victim of verbal abuse and recommended professional counseling: they don't oppose counseling, but say true encouragement should also empower her to act now.
More on Friendship
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Dear LFTP: 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions'
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The second Dear LFTP letter, titled 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions' (not a bathing problem — a bridal shower problem): the bride was clear she didn't want a…
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: the $4,200 loan that never came back
- How do I get past the sadness over the $4,200 loan my friend never repaid — do I just let it go?
The final Dear LFTP letter: a year ago a supposed friend asked to borrow money — her husband had left the country to renew his visa, her car was repossessed, she had no way to get to work.
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
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Dear LFTP: the birthday-gift pressure
- My friends insist on giving me birthday presents I can't reciprocate. Shouldn't my wishes have been respected since it's my birthday?
Mike reads the first Dear LFTP letter: a part-time worker paying her own health insurance asked friends to skip presents at a triple birthday dinner; they refused, saying she needn't reciprocate.
From No. 601 · Humble Faithful Idiot