Dear LFTP: should we tell Julia about the affair?
- Our friend is having an affair with our best friend's husband — should we tell her?
A listener letter: their friend Carrie revealed she has been having an affair with her best friend Julia's husband for years; their kids are best friends and take family vacations together. The writers ask whether to tell Julia or wait for it to come out. The hosts' verdict is immediate and unanimous: tell her right now — there are no caveats for hiding sin, the damage is already done and ongoing, and a friend who asks you to hold their secret is not being a friend. A second letter from 'Segler' argues to stay quiet for the kids' sake; the hosts flatly disagree.
More on Friendship
-
Dear LFTP: 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions'
- Who is in the wrong — the bride or the maid of honor who won't follow the shower instructions?
The second Dear LFTP letter, titled 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions' (not a bathing problem — a bridal shower problem): the bride was clear she didn't want a…
From No. 603 · Found Out
-
Dear LFTP: the $4,200 loan that never came back
- How do I get past the sadness over the $4,200 loan my friend never repaid — do I just let it go?
The final Dear LFTP letter: a year ago a supposed friend asked to borrow money — her husband had left the country to renew his visa, her car was repossessed, she had no way to get to work.
From No. 603 · Found Out
-
Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
-
Dear LFTP: the birthday-gift pressure
- My friends insist on giving me birthday presents I can't reciprocate. Shouldn't my wishes have been respected since it's my birthday?
Mike reads the first Dear LFTP letter: a part-time worker paying her own health insurance asked friends to skip presents at a triple birthday dinner; they refused, saying she needn't reciprocate.
From No. 601 · Humble Faithful Idiot