Dear LFTP: how to get off the shower invitation list
- How do I get off the bridal and baby shower invitation list?
A woman in her forties writes that she loathes bridal and baby showers — the games, the chatter, the cheap door prizes — and wants off the invitation list, asking whether other women feel the same. Advice: Mary says just keep politely declining, since the invitation itself is an expression of friendship; a host suggests owning the quirk publicly so people stop inviting her without taking it personally; another host tells how he got himself uninvited by deliberately bringing the wrong-gendered gift (boy clothes for a girl named Sutton) until the invites stopped. A crude baby-shower game ('pin the sperm on the uterus') sparks a medical-terms riff and an Ezekiel joke. The Secular answer predicts that if she stays unavailable, the invitations will eventually taper off.
More on Friendship
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Dear LFTP: 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions'
- Who is in the wrong — the bride or the maid of honor who won't follow the shower instructions?
The second Dear LFTP letter, titled 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions' (not a bathing problem — a bridal shower problem): the bride was clear she didn't want a…
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: the $4,200 loan that never came back
- How do I get past the sadness over the $4,200 loan my friend never repaid — do I just let it go?
The final Dear LFTP letter: a year ago a supposed friend asked to borrow money — her husband had left the country to renew his visa, her car was repossessed, she had no way to get to work.
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
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Dear LFTP: the birthday-gift pressure
- My friends insist on giving me birthday presents I can't reciprocate. Shouldn't my wishes have been respected since it's my birthday?
Mike reads the first Dear LFTP letter: a part-time worker paying her own health insurance asked friends to skip presents at a triple birthday dinner; they refused, saying she needn't reciprocate.
From No. 601 · Humble Faithful Idiot