Dear LFTP: the pet-sitter and the filthy house
- How do I tell a friend her house is too filthy to pet-sit in?
A listener who pet-sits for "Whitney" dreads her increasingly filthy house and asks how to broach it. The room splits between direct honesty (feelings don't outrank truth) and not policing another adult's comfort level, converging on: say something if it's a health hazard for her or the animals, offer to tidy while there, and never lead with your conclusion — start the conversation, don't end it. They reject the Secular answer for answering backward: it told her to quit first and justify later.
More on Friendship
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Dear LFTP: 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions'
- Who is in the wrong — the bride or the maid of honor who won't follow the shower instructions?
The second Dear LFTP letter, titled 'Maid of Honor Fails to Follow Shower Instructions' (not a bathing problem — a bridal shower problem): the bride was clear she didn't want a…
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: the $4,200 loan that never came back
- How do I get past the sadness over the $4,200 loan my friend never repaid — do I just let it go?
The final Dear LFTP letter: a year ago a supposed friend asked to borrow money — her husband had left the country to renew his visa, her car was repossessed, she had no way to get to work.
From No. 603 · Found Out
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Dear LFTP: Ralph calls three or four times a week
- How can I get my retired friend Ralph to call less frequently without being rude?
The letter: 'Ralph,' a longtime best friend, retired and is bored, so he calls three or four times a week 'even when there's nothing new to talk about,' rehashing the same things; subtle hints haven't worked; letting it go to voicemail just earns a callback request.
From No. 602 · Relationship Counseling
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Dear LFTP: the birthday-gift pressure
- My friends insist on giving me birthday presents I can't reciprocate. Shouldn't my wishes have been respected since it's my birthday?
Mike reads the first Dear LFTP letter: a part-time worker paying her own health insurance asked friends to skip presents at a triple birthday dinner; they refused, saying she needn't reciprocate.
From No. 601 · Humble Faithful Idiot